A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court
Invasion is a triviality to it. It was the INTERDICT!
I asked no questions; I didn't need to ask any. The Church had
struck; the thing for me to do was to get into a disguise, and
go warily. One of my servants gave me a suit of clothes, and
when we were safe beyond the town I put them on, and from that time
I traveled alone; I could not risk the embarrassment of company.
A miserable journey. A desolate silence everywhere. Even in
London itself. Traffic had ceased; men did not talk or laugh, or
go in groups, or even in couples; they moved aimlessly about, each
man by himself, with his head down, and woe and terror at his heart.
The Tower showed recent war-scars. Verily, much had been happening.
Of course, I meant to take the train for Camelot. Train! Why,
the station was as vacant as a cavern. I moved on. The journey
to Camelot was a repetition of what I had already seen. The Monday
and the Tuesday differed in no way from the Sunday. I arrived
far in the night. From being the best electric-lighted town in
the kingdom and the most like a recumbent sun of anything you ever
saw, it was become simply a blot--a blot upon darkness--that is
to say, it was darker and solider than the rest of the darkness,
and so you could see it a little better; it made me feel as if
maybe it was symbolical--a sort of sign that the Church was going to
_keep_ the upper hand now, and snuff out all my beautiful civilization
just like that. I found no life stirring in the somber streets.
I groped my way with a heavy heart. The vast castle loomed black
upon the hilltop, not a spark visible about it. The drawbridge
was down, the great gate stood wide, I entered without challenge,
my own heels making the only sound I heard--and it was sepulchral
enough, in those huge vacant courts.
CHAPTER XLII
WAR!
I found Clarence alone in his quarters, drowned in melancholy;
and in place of the electric light, he had reinstituted the ancient
rag-lamp, and sat there in a grisly twilight with all curtains
drawn tight. He sprang up and rushed for me eagerly, saying:
“Oh, it's worth a billion milrays to look upon a live person again!”
He knew me as easily as if I hadn't been disguised at all. Which
frightened me; one may easily believe that.
“Quick, now, tell me the meaning of this fearful disaster,” I said.
“How did it come about?”
“Well, if there hadn't been any Queen Guenever, it wouldn't have
come so early; but it would have come, anyway. It would have
come on your own account by and by; by luck, it happened to come
on the queen's.”
“_And_ Sir Launcelot's?”
“Just so.”
“Give me the details.”
“I reckon you will grant that during some years there has been
only one pair of eyes in these kingdoms that has not been looking
steadily askance at the queen and Sir Launcelot--”
“Yes, King Arthur's.”
“--and only one heart that was without suspicion--”
“Yes--the king's; a heart that isn't capable of thinking evil
of a friend.”
“Well, the king might have gone on, still happy and unsuspecting,
to the end of his days, but for one of your modern improvements
--the stock-board. When you left, three miles of the London,
Canterbury and Dover were ready for the rails, and also ready and
ripe for manipulation in the stock-market. It was wildcat, and
everybody knew it. The stock was for sale at a give-away. What
does Sir Launcelot do, but--”
“Yes, I know; he quietly picked up nearly all of it for a song;
then he bought about twice as much more, deliverable upon call;
and he was about to call when I left.”
“Very well, he did call. The boys couldn't deliver. Oh, he had
them--and he just settled his grip and squeezed them. They were
laughing in their sleeves over their smartness in selling stock
to him at 15 and 16 and along there that wasn't worth 10. Well,
when they had laughed long enough on that side of their mouths,
they rested-up that side by shifting the laugh to the other side.
That was when they compromised with the Invincible at 283!”
“Good land!”
“He skinned them alive, and they deserved it--anyway, the whole
kingdom rejoiced. Well, among the flayed were Sir Agravaine and
Sir Mordred, nephews to the king. End of the first act. Act
second, scene first, an apartment in Carlisle castle, where the
court had gone for a few days' hunting. Persons present, the
whole tribe of the king's nephews. Mordred and Agravaine propose
to call the guileless Arthur's attention to Guenever and Sir
Launcelot. Sir Gawaine, Sir Gareth, and Sir Gaheris will have
nothing to do with it. A dispute ensues, with loud talk; in the
midst of it enter the king. Mordred and Agravaine spring their
devastating tale upon him. _Tableau_. A trap is laid for Launcelot,
by the king's command, and Sir Launcelot walks into it. He made
it sufficiently uncomfortable for the ambushed witnesses--to wit,
Mordred, Agravaine, and twelve knights of lesser rank, for he
killed every one of them but Mordred; but of course that couldn't
straighten matters between Launcelot and the king, and didn't.”
“Oh, dear, only one thing could result--I see that. War, and
the knights of the realm divided into a king's party and a
Sir Launcelot's party.”
“Yes--that was the way of it. The king sent the queen to the
stake, proposing to purify her with fire. Launcelot and his
knights rescued her, and in doing it slew certain good old friends
of yours and mine--in fact, some of the best we ever had; to wit,
Sir Belias le Orgulous, Sir Segwarides, Sir Griflet le Fils de Dieu,
Sir Brandiles, Sir Aglovale--”
“Oh, you tear out my heartstrings.”
“--wait, I'm not done yet--Sir Tor, Sir Gauter, Sir Gillimer--”
“The very best man in my subordinate nine. What a handy right-fielder
he was!”
“--Sir Reynold's three brothers, Sir Damus, Sir Priamus, Sir Kay
the Stranger--”
“My peerless short-stop! I've seen him catch a daisy-cutter in
his teeth. Come, I can't stand this!”
“--Sir Driant, Sir Lambegus, Sir Herminde, Sir Pertilope,
Sir Perimones, and--whom do you think?”
“Rush! Go on.”
“Sir Gaheris, and Sir Gareth--both!”
“Oh, incredible! Their love for Launcelot was indestructible.”
“Well, it was an accident. They were simply onlookers; they were
unarmed, and were merely there to witness the queen's punishment.
Sir Launcelot smote down whoever came in the way of his blind fury,
and he killed these without noticing who they were. Here is an
instantaneous photograph one of our boys got of the battle; it's
for sale on every news-stand. There--the figures nearest the queen
are Sir Launcelot with his sword up, and Sir Gareth gasping his
latest breath. You can catch the agony in the queen's face through
the curling smoke. It's a rattling battle-picture.”
“Indeed, it is. We must take good care of it; its historical value
is incalculable. Go on.”
“Well, the rest of the tale is just war, pure and simple. Launcelot
retreated to his town and castle of Joyous Gard, and gathered
there a great following of knights. The king, with a great host,
went there, and there was desperate fighting during several days,
and, as a result, all the plain around was paved with corpses
and cast-iron. Then the Church patched up a peace between Arthur
and Launcelot and the queen and everybody--everybody but Sir Gawaine.
He was bitter about the slaying of his brothers, Gareth and Gaheris,
and would not be appeased. He notified Launcelot to get him
thence, and make swift preparation, and look to be soon attacked.
So Launcelot sailed to his Duchy of Guienne with his following, and
Gawaine soon followed with an army, and he beguiled Arthur to go
with him. Arthur left the kingdom in Sir Mordred's hands until
you should return--”
“Ah--a king's customary wisdom!”
“Yes. Sir Mordred set himself at once to work to make his kingship
permanent. He was going to marry Guenever, as a first move; but
she fled and shut herself up in the Tower of London. Mordred
attacked; the Bishop of Canterbury dropped down on him with the
Interdict. The king returned; Mordred fought him at Dover, at
Canterbury, and again at Barham Down. Then there was talk of peace
and a composition. Terms, Mordred to have Cornwall and Kent during
Arthur's life, and the whole kingdom afterward.”
“Well, upon my word! My dream of a republic to _be_ a dream, and
so remain.”
“Yes. The two armies lay near Salisbury. Gawaine--Gawaine's head
is at Dover Castle, he fell in the fight there--Gawaine appeared to
Arthur in a dream, at least his ghost did, and warned him to
refrain from conflict for a month, let the delay cost what it might.
But battle was precipitated by an accident. Arthur had given
order that if a sword was raised during the consultation over
the proposed treaty with Mordred, sound the trumpet and fall on!
for he had no confidence in Mordred. Mordred had given a similar
order to _his_ people. Well, by and by an adder bit a knight's heel;
the knight forgot all about the order, and made a slash at the
adder with his sword. Inside of half a minute those two prodigious
hosts came together with a crash! They butchered away all day.
Then the king--however, we have started something fresh since
you left--our paper has.”
“No? What is that?”
“War correspondence!”
“Why, that's good.”
“Yes, the paper was booming right along, for the Interdict made
no impression, got no grip, while the war lasted. I had war
correspondents with both armies. I will finish that battle by
reading you what one of the boys says:
Then the king looked about him, and then was he ware of all his
host and of all his good knights were left no more on live but two
knights, that was Sir Lucan de Butlere, and his brother Sir
Bedivere: and they were full sore wounded. Jesu mercy, said the
king, where are all my noble knights becomen? Alas that ever I
should see this doleful day. For now, said Arthur, I am come to
mine end. But would to God that I wist where were that traitor Sir
Mordred, that hath caused all this mischief. Then was King Arthur
ware where Sir Mordred leaned upon his sword among a great heap of
dead men. Now give me my spear, said Arthur unto Sir Lucan, for
yonder I have espied the traitor that all this woe hath wrought.
Sir, let him be, said Sir Lucan, for he is unhappy; and if ye pass
this unhappy day, ye shall be right well revenged upon him. Good
lord, remember ye of your night’s dream, and what the spirit of Sir
Gawaine told you this night, yet God of his great goodness hath
preserved you hitherto. Therefore, for God’s sake, my lord, leave
off by this. For blessed be God ye have won the field: for here we
be three on live, and with Sir Mordred is none on live. And if ye
leave off now, this wicked day of destiny is past. Tide me death,
betide me life, saith the king, now I see him yonder alone, he
shall never escape mine hands, for at a better avail shall I never
have him. God speed you well, said Sir Bedivere. Then the king gat
his spear in both his hands, and ran toward Sir Mordred crying,
Traitor, now is thy death day come. And when Sir Mordred heard Sir
Arthur, he ran until him with his sword drawn in his hand. And then
King Arthur smote Sir Mordred under the shield, with a foin of his
spear throughout the body more than a fathom. And when Sir Mordred
felt that he had his death’s wound, he thrust himself, with the
might that he had, up to the butt of King Arthur’s spear. And right
so he smote his father Arthur with his sword holden in both his
hands, on the side of the head, that the sword pierced the helmet
and the brain-pan, and therewithal Sir Mordred fell stark dead to