A journey to the world under-ground
The Form of the Oath, which all, who are admitted to publick
Employments and Honours, are forc’d to subscribe to, is this,
_Kaka manasca quihompu miriac Facku mesimbrii Caphani Crukkia Manascar
quebriac Krusundora._
That is, I _A. B._ do swear, that the sacred Tablet of the Sun appears
to me to be long, and I promise that I will persist in this Opinion to
my last Breath.
After this Oath, they are declar’d fit for the Service of the State,
and are incorporated into the Tribe of the _Nagiri_.
The Day after my Arrival, as I was sauntring in the Market-Place, I
beheld an old Man, whom they were hurrying away to be scourg’d. A large
Croud of _Cypresses_ follow’d him, with Scoffs and Revilings. Upon my
inquiring the Cause, I was inform’d, that he was a Heretick, who openly
taught, that the Tablet of the Sun seem’d to him to be square; and in
that diabolical Opinion he had obstinately persisted, after repeated
Admonitions.
This rous’d my Curiosity to go to the Temple, and try whether I had
orthodox Eyes or no. I examin’d the aforesaid Tablet with all the Eyes
I had, and really it appear’d square to me. This I ingenuously told my
Host, who at that Time had the Post of Ædile. With that he fetch’d a
deep Sigh, and confess’d to me, that it appear’d square to him too, but
that he dare not say so publickly, for fear of being dispossess’d of
his Employment by the governing Tribe.
All pale and trembling I left this execrable City, fearing lest my
Back must expiate the Crime of my Eyes, or lest branded with the Title
of Heretick, I should be sent with Ignominy out of their Dominions.
In Truth, no Institution ever appear’d more horrid, barbarous, and
unjust, than this, where Hypocrisies and Perjuries alone are the
Avenues to Preferment. And when I return’d to the _Potuans_, I took
every Opportunity to express my Indignation against that detestable
Race of People. But while I was in one of my angry Moods, and venting
my Spleen according to Custom, a certain Juniper Tree, with whom I had
liv’d in a good Degree of Intimacy, made me this Answer: “It is true,
says he, that the Conduct of the _Nagiri_ will always appear absurd
and iniquitous to the _Potuans_; but to you it should not seem at all
strange, that this Diversity of Eyes should cause such Cruelties,
because you have formerly assur’d me, that in most of the _European_
Dominions there are governing Tribes, which fall upon the rest with
Fire and Sword, upon Account of some Defect, not of their Eyes indeed,
but of their Reason; and you yourself extoll’d such a Proceeding as a
pious Act, and of Advantage to the Government.” I presently understood
the Drift of this Observation, and blusht for Shame. I left him soon,
and was ever after a stanch Advocate for Toleration, and entertain’d
milder Sentiments of People under Error.
_Kimal_, the next Principality, is accounted the most potent, by reason
of its immense Wealth. For besides the Silver Mines, which are there in
great Abundance, vast Quantities of Gold are gather’d from among the
Sands of their Rivers. Their Seas too afford the most costly Pearls.
And yet upon a due Examination of this Country, I could discover, that
Happiness did not consist in Wealth alone. For as many Inhabitants,
so many Divers and Diggers there were, who, bent upon Gain, seem’d
condemn’d to perpetual Slavery, and such a Slavery as one would think
was fit only for Criminals. Those who are rich enough to be exempted
from these Toils, are oblig’d to keep constant Watch. The whole Country
is so infested with Thieves and Robbers, that it is not safe to go
without a Guard.
_Non tam festa dies, ut cesset prodere furem,
Perfidiam, fraudes, atq; omni ex crimine lucrum.
Vivitur ex rapto; non hospes ab hospite tutus,
Non socer a genero, fratrum quoque gratia rara est.
Filius ante diem patrios inquirit in annos;
Victa jacet pietas, & virgo cæde madentes
Ultima cœlestum terras Astræa reliquit._
Hence this Nation, beheld with envious Eyes by their Neighbours,
drew Pity from me more than Envy. Fear, Jealousy, Suspicion, and
Distrust, reign in every Mind, and each looks upon his Neighbour as a
designing Enemy. So that endless Solicitude, wasting Cares, and pallid
Complexions, are the Fruits of the boasted Felicity of this Province.
It was not without Anxiety I travell’d over this Region; for in every
Road, and upon every Frontier, I was oblig’d to give an Account of my
Business, Name, and Country, to the Guards and Examiners, and I found
myself expos’d to all those Vexations which Travellers experience in
Countries that are jealous of Strangers. There is a Volcano, or burning
Mountain, in this Province, from whence ascend perpetual Whirlwinds of
Fire.
After having run over this Principality, and that with more Trouble
than I experienc’d throughout my whole Journey, I pursued my
Course full East. I every where found the Inhabitants sociable and
well-behav’d, but extremely paradoxical. The Natives of the little
Kingdom of _Quamboia_ surpriz’d me most. There the Order of Nature is
inverted. The more the Natives advance in Years, the more wanton and
voluptuous they grow; and Age produces such fantastic Vices, and such
lascivious Freaks, as Youth alone, in every other Place, is guilty of.
Here none are intrusted with the Cares of State, unless they are under
forty Years of Age. When they exceed this Term, they are too giddy for
Business, like Children,
_Quos dura premit custodia matrum_.
I saw here the Aged frisking and gamboling in the Streets like Boys,
and spending their Time in puerile Diversions. They did, as the Poet
says,
_Ædificare casas, plostello adjungere mures,
Ludere par impar, equitare in arundine longa_.
While on the other Hand the Youths took the Liberty to reprove them,
and sometimes drive them home before them with a Whip. I saw an old
decrepit Male Tree whipping a Top in the Market-Place, and was inform’d
he was some Years ago a Person of very great Consequence, no less than
President of the Grand Council. This inverted Order obtain’d also in
the weaker Sex. Hence, when a certain Youth was to be marry’d to an old
Lady, all were of Opinion he must undergo the Fate of _Actæon_; which
is diametrically opposite to what happens among us, where if an old Man
has a Mind for a young Bride, he has ample Reason to fear an Injury of
that Sort. Once I remember I met two old Bald-Heads engag’d in a Duel.
Amaz’d to find such Vigour at such an Age, I enquir’d the Cause of
this Duel, and was told, that the Quarrel arose about a Mistress they
had met with at one of their Haunts, and who had equally pleas’d them
both. They who told me this, added, that if the Governors of these two
old Sinners were to know of their Difference, their Backs would be sure
to smart for it. The same Evening a Report flew about, that a certain
venerable Matron had hang’d herself for Despair, because she had met
with a Repulse from a young _Beech_ she was enamour’d of.
This inverted Order of Nature demands of course an Inversion of the
Laws. Hence, in that Chapter of the Law which treats of Guardianship,
it is enacted, That the Administration of Goods shall not be granted
to any one, unless he be under forty Years of Age. Moreover, Contracts
are deem’d ineffectual, if enter’d into by Persons above Forty, unless
such Contracts are sign’d by their Tutors or Children. In the Chapter
concerning Subordination, there is this Injunction, _Let the Aged of
both Sexes be obedient to their Children_. Every Person in Office is
always dismiss’d before he arrives to the Age of Forty.
——_Interdicto huic omne adimat jus
Prætor, & ad juvenes abeat tutela propinquos._
I did not think it convenient to continue longer in this Place, where
if I had happen’d to have stay’d but ten Years, I must have been
oblig’d by Law to become a Child again.
In the Province of _Cocklecu_ there is a very perverse Custom, and such
as would be highly condemn’d among us. The Order of Things is indeed
inverted, but the Fault is not owing to Nature, but solely to the Laws.
The Natives are all _Junipers_ of both Sexes: But the Males alone
perform the Drudgery of the Kitchen, and every such ignoble Labour. In
Time of War indeed, they serve their Country, but rarely rise above the
Rank of common Soldiers. Some few get to be Ensigns, which is the very
highest military Honour the Males ever arrive to. The Females, on the
other Hand, are in Possession of all Honours and Employments sacred,
civil, or military. I had lately derided the _Potuans_ for observing
no Difference of Sex in the Distribution of publick Offices: But that
was nothing to the Phrenzy of this People. I could not conceive the
Meaning of so much Indolence in the Males, who, tho’ of far superior
Strength of Body, could yet so tamely submit to such a Yoke, and for
Ages together digest such an Ignominy. For it would have been very
easy, at any Time, to have freed themselves from so shameful a Tyranny.
But long and ancient Custom had so blinded them, that none ever thought
of attempting to remove such a Disgrace, but quietly believ’d it was
Nature’s Appointment, that the Government should be lodg’d in Female
Hands, and that it was the Business of the other Sex to spin, to
weave, to clean the House, and upon Occasion take a Beating from their
Wives. The Arguments, by which the Ladies justify’d this Custom, were
these: That as Nature had furnish’d the Males with greater Strength of
Body, her Intention in that could only be to destine them to the more
laborious and servile Duties of Life. Strangers are amaz’d, when going
into a House they see the Mistress of the Family in the Compting-House,
with a Pen in her Hand, and her Books before her, and at the same Time
find her Husband in the Kitchen scouring the Dishes. And, indeed,
whatever House I went to, if I enquir’d for the Master of the Family, I
was still conducted into the Kitchin.
_Hic lavet argentum, vasa aspera tergeat alter;
Vox dominæ fremit instantis virgamque tenentis._
Horrible were the Effects of this unnatural Custom. For as in other
Countries there are abandon’d Women, who prostitute themselves for
Hire, so here the young Men sell their Favours, and to that End hire
some House of Pleasure, which shall be easily known, either by a
Writing over it, or some other infallible Sign. And when the Men drive
this wicked Trade with too great Effrontery, and in too barefac’d a
Manner, they are had to Prison, and whipt like our Street-Walkers.
On the other Hand, the Matrons and Virgins here, without the least
Reproach, can prowl up and down, gaze at the young Fellows, nod,
whistle, tip the Wink, pluck them by the Sleeve, importune them, write
Love-Verses upon their Doors, boast of their Conquests, and reckon up
their Gallantries with as much Satisfaction as the _fine Gentlemen_ of
our World entertain you with their Amours. Moreover, it is no Crime
for the Ladies here to make amorous Poems, and send Presents to the
Youths; who, on the contrary, counterfeit Coyness and Modesty, as
knowing it indecent to surrender to a Lady upon the first Summons.
There was at the Time I was there, a mighty Disturbance about a noble
Youth, the Son of a Senator, who had been ravish’d by a young Woman. I
heard, that it was whisper’d among the Friends of the injur’d Youth,
that a Suit would be commenc’d against the Ravisher, and that at the
next Consistory Court she would be sentenc’d to repair the Dishonour by
Marriage, since it could be indubitably prov’d, that he was a Person
of an innocent Life and Conversation. During my Stay here, I had not
the Courage openly to condemn this deprav’d Custom: But upon my leaving
the City, I told several, that these Junipers acted in downright