Apologia pro vita sua being a history of his religious opinions
your Grace in a serious way before strangers;--indeed mixing very little
in general society, and not overapt to open myself in it, I have had
little temptation to do so. Least of all should I so forget myself as to
take undergraduates into my confidence in such a matter.
"I wish I could convey to your Grace the mixed and very painful
feelings, which the late history of the Irish Church has raised in
me:--the union of her members with men of heterodox views, and the
extinction (without ecclesiastical sanction) of half her Candlesticks,
the witnesses and guarantees of the Truth and trustees of the Covenant.
I willingly own that both in my secret judgment and my mode of speaking
concerning you to my friends, I have had great alternations and changes
of feeling,--defending, then blaming your policy, next praising your own
self and protesting against your measures, according as the affectionate
remembrances which I had of you rose against my utter aversion of the
secular and unbelieving policy in which I considered the Irish Church to
be implicated. I trust I shall never be forgetful of the kindness you
uniformly showed me during your residence in Oxford: and anxiously hope
that no duty to Christ and His Church may ever interfere with the
expression of my sense of it. However, on the present opportunity, I am
conscious to myself, that I am acting according to the dictates both of
duty and gratitude, if I beg your leave to state my persuasion, that the
perilous measures in which your Grace has acquiesced are but the
legitimate offspring of those principles, difficult to describe in few
words, with which your reputation is especially associated; principles
which bear upon the very fundamentals of all argument and investigation,
and affect almost every doctrine and every maxim by which our faith or
our conduct is to be guided. I can feel no reluctance to confess, that,
when I first was noticed by your Grace, gratitude to you and admiration
of your powers wrought upon me; and, had not something from within
resisted, I should certainly have adopted views on religious and social
duty, which seem to my present judgment to be based in the pride of
reason and to tend towards infidelity, and which in your own case
nothing but your Grace's high religious temper and the unclouded faith
of early piety has been able to withstand.
"I am quite confident, that, however you may regard this judgment, you
will give me credit, not only for honesty, but for a deeper feeling in
thus laying it before you.
"May I be suffered to add, that your name is ever mentioned in my
prayers, and to subscribe myself
"Your Grace's very sincere friend and servant,
"J. H. NEWMAN."
3.
"Dublin, November 3, 1834.
"My dear Newman,
"I cannot forbear writing again to express the great satisfaction I feel
in the course I adopted; which has, eventually, enabled me to contradict
a report which was more prevalent and more confidently upheld than I
could have thought possible: and which, while it was perhaps likely to
hurt my character with some persons, was injurious to yours in the eyes
of the best men. For what idea must any one have had of religion--or at
least of your religion--who was led to think there was any truth in the
imputation to you of such uncharitable arrogance!
"But it is a rule with me, not to cherish, even on the strongest
assertions, any belief or even suspicion, to the prejudice of any one
whom I have any reason to think well of, till I have carefully inquired,
and dispassionately heard both sides. And I think if others were to
adopt the same rule, I should not myself be quite so much abused as I
have been.
"I am well aware indeed that one cannot expect all, even good men, to
think alike on every point, even after they shall have heard both sides;
and that we may expect many to judge, after all, very harshly of those
who do differ from them: for, God help us! what will become of men if
they receive no more mercy than they show to each other! But at least,
if the rule were observed, men would not condemn a brother on mere vague
popular rumour, about principles (as in my case) 'difficult to describe
in few words,' and with which his 'reputation is associated.' My own
reputation I know is associated, to a very great degree, with what are
in fact calumnious imputations, originated in exaggerated, distorted, or
absolutely false statements, for which even those who circulate them, do
not, for the most part, pretend to have any ground except popular
rumour: like the Jews at Rome; 'as for this way, we know that it is
every where spoken against.'
"For I have ascertained that a very large proportion of those who join
in the outcry against my works, confess, or even boast, that they have
never read them. And in respect of the measure you advert to--the Church
Temporalities Act--(which of course I shall not now discuss), it is
curious to see how many of those who load me with censure for
acquiescing in it, receive with open arms, and laud to the skies, the
Primate; who was consulted on the measure--as was natural, considering
his knowledge of Irish affairs, and his influence--long before me; and
gave his consent to it; differing from Ministers only on a point of
detail, whether the revenues of six Sees, or of ten, should be
alienated.
"Of course, every one is bound ultimately to decide according to his own
judgment; nor do I mean to shelter myself under his example: but only to
point out what strange notions of justice those have, who acquit with
applause the leader, and condemn the follower in the same individual
transaction.
"Far be it from any servant of our Master, to feel surprise or anger at
being thus treated; it is only an admonition to me to avoid treating
others in a similar manner; and not to 'judge another's servant,' at
least without a fair hearing.
"You do me no more than justice, in feeling confident that I shall give
you credit both for 'honesty and for a deeper feeling' in freely laying
your opinions before me: and besides this, you might have been no less
confident, from your own experience, that, long since--whenever it was
that you changed your judgment respecting me--if you had freely and
calmly remonstrated with me on any point where you thought me going
wrong, I should have listened to you with that readiness and candour and
deference, which as you well know, I always showed, in the times when
'we took sweet counsel together, and walked in the house of God as
friends;'--when we consulted together about so many practical measures,
and about almost all the principal points in my publications.
"I happen to have before me a letter from you just eight years ago, in
which, after saying that 'there are few things you wish more sincerely
than to be known as a friend of mine,' and attributing to me, in the
warmest and most flattering terms, a much greater share in the forming
of your mind than I could presume to claim, you bear a testimony, in
which I do most heartily concur, to the _freedom_ at least of our
_intercourse_, and the readiness and respect with which you were
listened to. Your words are: 'Much as I owe to Oriel in the way of
mental improvement, to none, as I think, do I owe so much as to
yourself. I know who it was first gave me heart to look about me after
my election, and taught me to think correctly, and--strange office for
an instructor--to rely upon myself. Nor can I forget that it has been at
your kind suggestion, that I have since been led to employ myself in the
consideration of several subjects, which I cannot doubt have been very
beneficial to my mind.'
"If in all this I was erroneous,--if I have misled you, or any one else,
into 'the pride of reason,' or any other kind of pride,--or if I have
entertained, or led others into, any wrong opinions, I can only say I
sincerely regret it. And again I rejoice if I have been the means of
contributing to form in any one that 'high religious temper and
unclouded faith' of which I not only believe, with you, that they are
able to withstand tendencies towards infidelity, but also, that
_without_ them, no correctness of abstract opinions is worth much. But
what I meant to point out, is, that there was plainly nothing to
preclude you from offering friendly admonition (when your view of my
principles changed), with a full confidence of being at least patiently
and kindly listened to.
"I for my part could not bring myself to find relief in escaping the
society of an old friend,--with whom I had been accustomed to frank
discussion,--on account of my differing from him as to certain
principles, whether through a change of _his_ views, or (much more) of
_my own_,--till at least I had made full trial of private and
affectionate remonstrance and free discussion. Even a 'man that is a
heretic,' we are told, even a ruler of a Church is not to reject, till
after repeated admonitions.
"But though your regard for me does not show itself such as I think mine
would have been under similar circumstances, I will not therefore reject
what remains of it. Let us pray for each other that it may please God to
enlighten whichever of us is, on any point, in error, and recall him to
the truth; and that at any rate we may hold fast that charity, without
which all knowledge, and all faith, that could remove mountains, will
profit us nothing.
"I fear you will read with a jaundiced eye,--if you venture to read it
at all--any publication of mine; but 'for auld lang syne' I take
advantage of a frank to enclose you my last two addresses to my clergy.
"Very sincerely yours,
"RD. WHATELY."
4.
"Oriel, November 11, 1834.
"My dear Lord,
"The remarks contained in your last letter do not come upon me by
surprise, and I can only wish that I may be as able to explain myself to
you, as I do with a clear and honest conscience to myself. Your Grace
will observe that the letter of mine from which you make an extract, was
written when I _was_ in habits of intimacy with you, in which I have not
been of late years. It does not at all follow, because I could then
speak freely to you, that I might at another time. Opportunity is the
chief thing in such an office as delivering to a superior an opinion
about himself. Though I never concealed my opinion from you, I have
never been forward. I have spoken when place and time admitted, when my
opinion was asked, when I was called to your side and was made your
counsellor. No such favourable circumstances have befallen me of late
years,--if I must now state in explanation what in truth has never
occurred to me in _this fulness_, till now I am called to reflect upon
my own conduct and to account for an apparent omission. I have spoken
the first opportunity you have given me; and I am persuaded good very
seldom comes of _volunteering_ a remonstrance.
"Again, I cannot doubt for an instant that you have long been aware in a
measure that my opinions differed from your Grace's. You knew it when at
Oxford, for you often found me differing from you. You must have felt
it, at the time you left Oxford for Dublin. You must have known it from
hearsay in consequence of the book I have published. What indeed can
account for my want of opportunities to speak to you freely my mind, but
the feeling on your part, (which, if existing, is nothing but a fair
reason,) that my views are different from yours?
"And that difference is certainly of no recent date. I tacitly allude to
it in the very letter you quote--in which, I recollect well that the
words 'strange office for an instructor,--_to rely upon myself_,' were
intended to convey to you that, much as I valued (and still value) your
great kindness and the advantage of your countenance to me at that time,
yet even then I did not fall in with the line of opinions which you had