Boswell's Life of Johnson
who preaches in the stocks will always have hearers enough.' BOSWELL.
'But Elwal thought himself in the right.' JOHNSON. 'We are not providing
for mad people; there are places for them in the neighbourhood.'
(meaning moorfields.) MAYO. 'But, Sir, is it not very hard that I should
not be allowed to teach my children what I really believe to be the
truth?' JOHNSON. 'Why, Sir, you might contrive to teach your children
extra scandalum; but, Sir, the magistrate, if he knows it, has a right
to restrain you. Suppose you teach your children to be thieves?' MAYO.
'This is making a joke of the subject.' JOHNSON. 'Nay, Sir, take it
thus:--that you teach them the community of goods; for which there are
as many plausible arguments as for most erroneous doctrines. You teach
them that all things at first were in common, and that no man had a
right to any thing but as he laid his hands upon it; and that this still
is, or ought to be, the rule amongst mankind. Here, Sir, you sap a great
principle in society,--property. And don't you think the magistrate
would have a right to prevent you? Or, suppose you should teach your
children the notion of the Adamites, and they should run naked into the
streets, would not the magistrate have a right to flog 'em into their
doublets?' MAYO. 'I think the magistrate has no right to interfere till
there is some overt act.' BOSWELL. 'So, Sir, though he sees an enemy
to the state charging a blunderbuss, he is not to interfere till it is
fired off?' MAYO. 'He must be sure of its direction against the state.'
JOHNSON. 'The magistrate is to judge of that.--He has no right to
restrain your thinking, because the evil centers in yourself. If a
man were sitting at this table, and chopping off his fingers, the
magistrate, as guardian of the community, has no authority to restrain
him, however he might do it from kindness as a parent.--Though, indeed,
upon more consideration, I think he may; as it is probable, that he who
is chopping off his own fingers, may soon proceed to chop off those of
other people. If I think it right to steal Mr. Dilly's plate, I am a bad
man; but he can say nothing to me. If I make an open declaration that
I think so, he will keep me out of his house. If I put forth my hand, I
shall be sent to Newgate. This is the gradation of thinking, preaching,
and acting: if a man thinks erroneously, he may keep his thoughts to
himself, and nobody will trouble him; if he preaches erroneous doctrine,
society may expel him; if he acts in consequence of it, the law takes
place, and he is hanged.' MAYO. 'But, Sir, ought not Christians to have
liberty of conscience?' JOHNSON. 'I have already told you so, Sir. You
are coming back to where you were.' BOSWELL. 'Dr. Mayo is always taking
a return post-chaise, and going the stage over again. He has it at
half price.' JOHNSON. 'Dr. Mayo, like other champions for unlimited
toleration, has got a set of words. Sir, it is no matter, politically,
whether the magistrate be right or wrong. Suppose a club were to
be formed, to drink confusion to King George the Third, and a happy
restoration to Charles the Third, this would be very bad with respect
to the State; but every member of that club must either conform to its
rules, or be turned out of it. Old Baxter, I remember, maintains, that
the magistrate should "tolerate all things that are tolerable." This is
no good definition of toleration upon any principle; but it shows that
he thought some things were not tolerable.' TOPLADY. 'Sir, you have
untwisted this difficult subject with great dexterity.'
During this argument, Goldsmith sat in restless agitation, from a wish
to get in and SHINE. Finding himself excluded, he had taken his hat
to go away, but remained for some time with it in his hand, like a
gamester, who at the close of a long night, lingers for a little while,
to see if he can have a favourable opening to finish with success. Once
when he was beginning to speak, he found himself overpowered by the loud
voice of Johnson, who was at the opposite end of the table, and did not
perceive Goldsmith's attempt. Thus disappointed of his wish to obtain
the attention of the company, Goldsmith in a passion threw down his hat,
looking angrily at Johnson, and exclaiming in a bitter tone, 'TAKE IT.'
When Toplady was going to speak, Johnson uttered some sound, which led
Goldsmith to think that he was beginning again, and taking the words
from Toplady. Upon which, he seized this opportunity of venting his own
envy and spleen, under the pretext of supporting another person:
'Sir, (said he to Johnson,) the gentleman has heard you patiently for
an hour; pray allow us now to hear him.' JOHNSON. (sternly,) 'Sir, I
was not interrupting the gentleman. I was only giving him a signal of
my attention. Sir, you are impertinent.' Goldsmith made no reply, but
continued in the company for some time.
A gentleman present ventured to ask Dr. Johnson if there was not a
material difference as to toleration of opinions which lead to action,
and opinions merely speculative; for instance, would it be wrong in
the magistrate to tolerate those who preach against the doctrine of the
TRINITY? Johnson was highly offended, and said, 'I wonder, Sir, how a
gentleman of your piety can introduce this subject in a mixed company.'
He told me afterwards, that the impropriety was, that perhaps some of
the company might have talked on the subject in such terms as might
have shocked him; or he might have been forced to appear in their eyes
a narrow-minded man. The gentleman, with submissive deference, said,
he had only hinted at the question from a desire to hear Dr. Johnson's
opinion upon it. JOHNSON. 'Why then, Sir, I think that permitting men
to preach any opinion contrary to the doctrine of the established church
tends, in a certain degree, to lessen the authority of the church,
and consequently, to lessen the influence of religion.' 'It may be
considered, (said the gentleman,) whether it would not be politick to
tolerate in such a case.' JOHNSON. 'Sir, we have been talking of RIGHT:
this is another question. I think it is NOT politick to tolerate in such
a case.'
BOSWELL. 'Pray, Mr. Dilly, how does Dr. Leland's History of Ireland
sell?' JOHNSON. (bursting forth with a generous indignation,) 'The Irish
are in a most unnatural state; for we see there the minority prevailing
over the majority. There is no instance, even in the ten persecutions,
of such severity as that which the protestants of Ireland have exercised
against the Catholicks. Did we tell them we have conquered them,
it would be above board: to punish them by confiscation and other
penalties, as rebels, was monstrous injustice. King William was not
their lawful sovereign: he had not been acknowledged by the Parliament
of Ireland, when they appeared in arms against him.'
He and Mr. Langton and I went together to THE CLUB, where we found Mr.
Burke, Mr. Garrick, and some other members, and amongst them our friend
Goldsmith, who sat silently brooding over Johnson's reprimand to him
after dinner. Johnson perceived this, and said aside to some of us,
'I'll make Goldsmith forgive me;' and then called to him in a loud
voice, 'Dr. Goldsmith,--something passed to-day where you and I dined;
I ask your pardon.' Goldsmith answered placidly, 'It must be much from
you, Sir, that I take ill.' And so at once the difference was over, and
they were on as easy terms as ever, and Goldsmith rattled away as usual.
In our way to the club to-night, when I regretted that Goldsmith would,
upon every occasion, endeavour to shine, by which he often exposed
himself, Mr. Langton observed, that he was not like Addison, who
was content with the fame of his writings, and did not aim also at
excellency in conversation, for which he found himself unfit; and that
he said to a lady who complained of his having talked little in company,
'Madam, I have but ninepence in ready money, but I can draw for a
thousand pounds.' I observed, that Goldsmith had a great deal of gold
in his cabinet, but, not content with that, was always taking out his
purse. JOHNSON. 'Yes, Sir, and that so often an empty purse!'
Goldsmith's incessant desire of being conspicuous in company, was the
occasion of his sometimes appearing to such disadvantage as one should
hardly have supposed possible in a man of his genius. When his literary
reputation had risen deservedly high, and his society was much courted,
he became very jealous of the extraordinary attention which was every
where paid to Johnson. One evening, in a circle of wits, he found
fault with me for talking of Johnson as entitled to the honour of
unquestionable superiority. 'Sir, (said he,) you are for making a
monarchy of what should be a republick.'
He was still more mortified, when talking in a company with fluent
vivacity, and, as he flattered himself, to the admiration of all who
were present; a German who sat next him, and perceived Johnson rolling
himself, as if about to speak, suddenly stopped him, saying, 'Stay,
stay,--Toctor Shonson is going to say something.' This was, no doubt,
very provoking, especially to one so irritable as Goldsmith, who
frequently mentioned it with strong expressions of indignation.
It may also be observed, that Goldsmith was sometimes content to
be treated with an easy familiarity, but, upon occasions, would be
consequential and important. An instance of this occurred in a small
particular. Johnson had a way of contracting the names of his friends;
as Beauclerk, Beau; Boswell, Bozzy; Langton, Lanky; Murphy, Mur;
Sheridan, Sherry. I remember one day, when Tom Davies was telling that
Dr. Johnson said, 'We are all in labour for a name to GOLDY'S play,'
Goldsmith seemed displeased that such a liberty should be taken with his
name, and said, 'I have often desired him not to call me GOLDY.' Tom was
remarkably attentive to the most minute circumstance about Johnson. I
recollect his telling me once, on my arrival in London, 'Sir, our great
friend has made an improvement on his appellation of old Mr. Sheridan.
He calls him now Sherry derry.'
On Monday, May 9, as I was to set out on my return to Scotland next
morning, I was desirous to see as much of Dr. Johnson as I could. But
I first called on Goldsmith to take leave of him. The jealousy and
envy which, though possessed of many most amiable qualities, he frankly
avowed, broke out violently at this interview. Upon another occasion,
when Goldsmith confessed himself to be of an envious disposition, I
contended with Johnson that we ought not to be angry with him, he was so
candid in owning it. 'Nay, Sir, (said Johnson,) we must be angry that a
man has such a superabundance of an odious quality, that he cannot keep
it within his own breast, but it boils over.' In my opinion, however,
Goldsmith had not more of it than other people have, but only talked of
it freely.
He now seemed very angry that Johnson was going to be a traveller; said
'he would be a dead weight for me to carry, and that I should never be
able to lug him along through the Highlands and Hebrides.' Nor would he
patiently allow me to enlarge upon Johnson's wonderful abilities; but
exclaimed, 'Is he like Burke, who winds into a subject like a serpent?'
'But, (said I,) Johnson is the Hercules who strangled serpents in his
cradle.'
I dined with Dr. Johnson at General Paoli's. He was obliged, by
indisposition, to leave the company early; he appointed me, however,
to meet him in the evening at Mr. (now Sir Robert) Chambers's in the
Temple, where he accordingly came, though he continued to be very ill.
Chambers, as is common on such occasions, prescribed various remedies to
him. JOHNSON. (fretted by pain,) 'Pr'ythee don't tease me. Stay till I
am well, and then you shall tell me how to cure myself.' He grew better,