Boswell's Life of Johnson
us. Dr. Johnson surprised him not a little, by acknowledging with a look
of horrour, that he was much oppressed by the fear of death. The amiable
Dr. Adams suggested that GOD was infinitely good. JOHNSON. 'That he is
infinitely good, as far as the perfection of his nature will allow, I
certainly believe; but it is necessary for good upon the whole, that
individuals should be punished. As to an INDIVIDUAL, therefore, he is
not infinitely good; and as I cannot be SURE that I have fulfilled the
conditions on which salvation is granted, I am afraid I may be one of
those who shall be damned.' (looking dismally). DR. ADAMS. 'What do you
mean by damned?' JOHNSON. (passionately and loudly,) 'Sent to Hell, Sir,
and punished everlastingly!' DR. ADAMS. 'I don't believe that doctrine.'
JOHNSON. 'Hold, Sir, do you believe that some will be punished at all?'
DR. ADAMS. 'Being excluded from Heaven will be a punishment; yet there
may be no great positive suffering.' JOHNSON. Well, Sir; but, if you
admit any degree of punishment, there is an end of your argument for
infinite goodness simply considered; for, infinite goodness would
inflict no punishment whatever. There is not infinite goodness
physically considered; morally there is.' BOSWELL. 'But may not a man
attain to such a degree of hope as not to be uneasy from the fear of
death?' JOHNSON. 'A man may have such a degree of hope as to keep him
quiet. You see I am not quiet, from the vehemence with which I talk; but
I do not despair.' MRS. ADAMS. 'You seem, Sir, to forget the merits
of our Redeemer.' JOHNSON. 'Madam, I do not forget the merits of my
Redeemer; but my Redeemer has said that he will set some on his right
hand and some on his left.' He was in gloomy agitation, and said, 'I'll
have no more on't.' If what has now been stated should be urged by
the enemies of Christianity, as if its influence on the mind were
not benignant, let it be remembered, that Johnson's temperament was
melancholy, of which such direful apprehensions of futurity are often a
common effect. We shall presently see that when he approached nearer to
his aweful change, his mind became tranquil, and he exhibited as much
fortitude as becomes a thinking man in that situation.
From the subject of death we passed to discourse of life, whether it was
upon the whole more happy or miserable. Johnson was decidedly for the
balance of misery: in confirmation of which I maintained, that no man
would choose to lead over again the life which he had experienced.
Johnson acceded to that opinion in the strongest terms.
On Sunday, June 13, our philosopher was calm at breakfast. There was
something exceedingly pleasing in our leading a College life, without
restraint, and with superiour elegance, in consequence of our living
in the Master's house, and having the company of ladies. Mrs. Kennicot
related, in his presence, a lively saying of Dr. Johnson to Miss Hannah
More, who had expressed a wonder that the poet who had written Paradise
Lost should write such poor Sonnets:--'Milton, Madam, was a genius
that could cut a Colossus from a rock; but could not carve heads upon
cherry-stones.'
On Monday, June 14, and Tuesday, 15, Dr. Johnson and I dined, on one
of them, I forget which, with Mr. Mickle, translator of the Lusiad, at
Wheatley, a very pretty country place a few miles from Oxford; and on
the other with Dr. Wetherell, Master of University College. From Dr.
Wetherell's he went to visit Mr. Sackville Parker, the bookseller; and
when he returned to us, gave the following account of his visit, saying,
'I have been to see my old friend, Sack Parker; I find he has married
his maid; he has done right. She had lived with him many years in great
confidence, and they had mingled minds; I do not think he could have
found any wife that would have made him so happy. The woman was very
attentive and civil to me; she pressed me to fix a day for dining with
them, and to say what I liked, and she would be sure to get it for me.
Poor Sack! He is very ill, indeed. We parted as never to meet again.
It has quite broke me down.' This pathetic narrative was strangely
diversified with the grave and earnest defence of a man's having married
his maid. I could not but feel it as in some degree ludicrous.
In the morning of Tuesday, June 15, while we sat at Dr. Adams's, we
talked of a printed letter from the Reverend Herbert Croft, to a young
gentleman who had been his pupil, in which he advised him to read to the
end of whatever books he should begin to read. JOHNSON. 'This is surely
a strange advice; you may as well resolve that whatever men you happen
to get acquainted with, you are to keep to them for life. A book may be
good for nothing; or there may be only one thing in it worth knowing;
are we to read it all through? These Voyages, (pointing to the three
large volumes of Voyages to the South Sea, which were just come out) WHO
will read them through? A man had better work his way before the mast,
than read them through; they will be eaten by rats and mice, before they
are read through. There can be little entertainment in such books; one
set of Savages is like another.' BOSWELL. 'I do not think the people of
Otaheite can be reckoned Savages.' JOHNSON. 'Don't cant in defence of
Savages.' BOSWELL. 'They have the art of navigation.' JOHNSON. 'A dog or
a cat can swim.' BOSWELL. 'They carve very ingeniously.' JOHNSON. 'A cat
can scratch, and a child with a nail can scratch.' I perceived this was
none of the mollia tempora fandi; so desisted.
Upon his mentioning that when he came to College he wrote his first
exercise twice over; but never did so afterwards; MISS ADAMS. 'I
suppose, Sir, you could not make them better?' JOHNSON. 'Yes, Madam, to
be sure, I could make them better. Thought is better than no thought.'
MISS ADAMS. 'Do you think, Sir, you could make your Ramblers better?'
JOHNSON. 'Certainly I could.' BOSWELL. 'I'll lay a bet, Sir, you
cannot.' JOHNSON. 'But I will, Sir, if I choose. I shall make the best
of them you shall pick out, better.' BOSWELL. 'But you may add to them.
I will not allow of that.' JOHNSON. 'Nay, Sir, there are three ways of
making them better;--putting out,--adding,--or correcting.'
During our visit at Oxford, the following conversation passed between
him and me on the subject of my trying my fortune at the English bar:
Having asked whether a very extensive acquaintance in London, which was
very valuable, and of great advantage to a man at large, might not
be prejudicial to a lawyer, by preventing him from giving sufficient
attention to his business;--JOHNSON. 'Sir, you will attend to business,
as business lays hold of you. When not actually employed, you may see
your friends as much as you do now. You may dine at a Club every day,
and sup with one of the members every night; and you may be as much at
publick places as one who has seen them all would wish to be. But you
must take care to attend constantly in Westminster-Hall; both to mind
your business, as it is almost all learnt there, (for nobody reads now;)
and to shew that you want to have business. And you must not be too
often seen at publick places, that competitors may not have it to say,
"He is always at the Playhouse or at Ranelagh, and never to be found at
his chambers." And, Sir, there must be a kind of solemnity in the manner
of a professional man. I have nothing particular to say to you on the
subject. All this I should say to any one; I should have said it to Lord
Thurlow twenty years ago.'
On Wednesday, June 19, Dr. Johnson and I returned to London; he was not
well to-day, and said very little, employing himself chiefly in reading
Euripides. He expressed some displeasure at me, for not observing
sufficiently the various objects upon the road. 'If I had your eyes,
Sir, (said he,) I should count the passengers.' It was wonderful how
accurate his observation of visual objects was, notwithstanding his
imperfect eyesight, owing to a habit of attention. That he was much
satisfied with the respect paid to him at Dr. Adams's is thus attested
by himself: 'I returned last night from Oxford, after a fortnight's
abode with Dr. Adams, who treated me as well as I could expect or wish;
and he that contents a sick man, a man whom it is impossible to please,
has surely done his part well.'
After his return to London from this excursion, I saw him frequently,
but have few memorandums: I shall therefore here insert some particulars
which I collected at various times.
It having been mentioned to Dr. Johnson that a gentleman who had a son
whom he imagined to have an extreme degree of timidity, resolved to send
him to a publick school, that he might acquire confidence;--'Sir, (said
Johnson,) this is a preposterous expedient for removing his infirmity;
such a disposition should be cultivated in the shade. Placing him at a
publick school is forcing an owl upon day.'
Speaking of a gentleman whose house was much frequented by low company;
'Rags, Sir, (said he,) will always make their appearance where they have
a right to do it.'
Of the same gentleman's mode of living, he said, 'Sir, the servants,
instead of doing what they are bid, stand round the table in idle
clusters, gaping upon the guests; and seem as unfit to attend a company,
as to steer a man of war.'
A dull country magistrate gave Johnson a long tedious account of his
exercising his criminal jurisdiction, the result of which was his having
sentenced four convicts to transportation. Johnson, in an agony of
impatience to get rid of such a companion, exclaimed, 'I heartily wish,
Sir, that I were a fifth.'
Johnson was present when a tragedy was read, in which there occurred
this line:--
'Who rules o'er freemen should himself be free.'
The company having admired it much, 'I cannot agree with you (said
Johnson). It might as well be said,--
'Who drives fat oxen should himself be fat.'
Johnson having argued for some time with a pertinacious gentleman; his
opponent, who had talked in a very puzzling manner, happened to say, 'I
don't understand you, Sir:' upon which Johnson observed, 'Sir, I
have found you an argument; but I am not obliged to find you an
understanding.'
Talking to me of Horry Walpole, (as Horace late Earl of Orford was
often called,) Johnson allowed that he got together a great many curious
little things, and told them in an elegant manner. Mr. Walpole thought
Johnson a more amiable character after reading his Letters to Mrs.
Thrale: but never was one of the true admirers of that great man. We may
suppose a prejudice conceived, if he ever heard Johnson's account to Sir
George Staunton, that when he made the speeches in parliament for the
Gentleman's Magazine, 'he always took care to put Sir Robert Walpole
in the wrong, and to say every thing he could against the electorate
of Hanover.' The celebrated Heroick Epistle, in which Johnson is
satyrically introduced, has been ascribed both to Mr. Walpole and
Mr. Mason. One day at Mr. Courtenay's, when a gentleman expressed his
opinion that there was more energy in that poem than could be expected
from Mr. Walpole; Mr. Warton, the late Laureat, observed, 'It may have
been written by Walpole, and BUCKRAM'D by Mason.'
Sir Joshua Reynolds having said that he took the altitude of a man's
taste by his stories and his wit, and of his understanding by the
remarks which he repeated; being always sure that he must be a weak
man who quotes common things with an emphasis as if they were oracles;
Johnson agreed with him; and Sir Joshua having also observed that the
real character of a man was found out by his amusements,--Johnson added,
'Yes, Sir; no man is a hypocrite in his pleasures.'
I have mentioned Johnson's general aversion to a pun. He once, however,