Gulliver's Travels into Several Remote Nations of the World
for his own interest, would not suffer any one to touch me except my
nurse; and to prevent danger, benches were set round the table at such
a distance as to put me out of every body’s reach. However, an unlucky
school-boy aimed a hazel nut directly at my head, which very narrowly
missed me; otherwise it came with so much violence, that it would have
infallibly knocked out my brains, for it was almost as large as a small
pumpkin, but I had the satisfaction to see the young rogue well beaten,
and turned out of the room.
My master gave public notice that he would show me again the next
market-day; and in the meantime he prepared a convenient vehicle for
me, which he had reason enough to do; for I was so tired with my first
journey, and with entertaining company for eight hours together, that I
could hardly stand upon my legs, or speak a word. It was at least three
days before I recovered my strength; and that I might have no rest at
home, all the neighbouring gentlemen from a hundred miles round,
hearing of my fame, came to see me at my master’s own house. There
could not be fewer than thirty persons with their wives and children
(for the country is very populous;) and my master demanded the rate of
a full room whenever he showed me at home, although it were only to a
single family; so that for some time I had but little ease every day of
the week (except Wednesday, which is their Sabbath,) although I were
not carried to the town.
My master, finding how profitable I was likely to be, resolved to carry
me to the most considerable cities of the kingdom. Having therefore
provided himself with all things necessary for a long journey, and
settled his affairs at home, he took leave of his wife, and upon the
17th of August, 1703, about two months after my arrival, we set out for
the metropolis, situated near the middle of that empire, and about
three thousand miles distance from our house. My master made his
daughter Glumdalclitch ride behind him. She carried me on her lap, in a
box tied about her waist. The girl had lined it on all sides with the
softest cloth she could get, well quilted underneath, furnished it with
her baby’s bed, provided me with linen and other necessaries, and made
everything as convenient as she could. We had no other company but a
boy of the house, who rode after us with the luggage.
My master’s design was to show me in all the towns by the way, and to
step out of the road for fifty or a hundred miles, to any village, or
person of quality’s house, where he might expect custom. We made easy
journeys, of not above seven or eight score miles a day; for
Glumdalclitch, on purpose to spare me, complained she was tired with
the trotting of the horse. She often took me out of my box, at my own
desire, to give me air, and show me the country, but always held me
fast by a leading-string. We passed over five or six rivers, many
degrees broader and deeper than the Nile or the Ganges: and there was
hardly a rivulet so small as the Thames at London Bridge. We were ten
weeks in our journey, and I was shown in eighteen large towns, besides
many villages, and private families.
On the 26th day of October we arrived at the metropolis, called in
their language _Lorbrulgrud_, or Pride of the Universe. My master took
a lodging in the principal street of the city, not far from the royal
palace, and put out bills in the usual form, containing an exact
description of my person and parts. He hired a large room between three
and four hundred feet wide. He provided a table sixty feet in diameter,
upon which I was to act my part, and pallisadoed it round three feet
from the edge, and as many high, to prevent my falling over. I was
shown ten times a day, to the wonder and satisfaction of all people. I
could now speak the language tolerably well, and perfectly understood
every word, that was spoken to me. Besides, I had learnt their
alphabet, and could make a shift to explain a sentence here and there;
for Glumdalclitch had been my instructor while we were at home, and at
leisure hours during our journey. She carried a little book in her
pocket, not much larger than a Sanson’s Atlas; it was a common treatise
for the use of young girls, giving a short account of their religion:
out of this she taught me my letters, and interpreted the words.
CHAPTER III.
The author sent for to court. The queen buys him of his master the
farmer, and presents him to the king. He disputes with his majesty’s
great scholars. An apartment at court provided for the author. He is in
high favour with the queen. He stands up for the honour of his own
country. His quarrels with the queen’s dwarf.
The frequent labours I underwent every day, made, in a few weeks, a
very considerable change in my health: the more my master got by me,
the more insatiable he grew. I had quite lost my stomach, and was
almost reduced to a skeleton. The farmer observed it, and concluding I
must soon die, resolved to make as good a hand of me as he could. While
he was thus reasoning and resolving with himself, a _sardral_, or
gentleman-usher, came from court, commanding my master to carry me
immediately thither for the diversion of the queen and her ladies. Some
of the latter had already been to see me, and reported strange things
of my beauty, behaviour, and good sense. Her majesty, and those who
attended her, were beyond measure delighted with my demeanour. I fell
on my knees, and begged the honour of kissing her imperial foot; but
this gracious princess held out her little finger towards me, after I
was set on the table, which I embraced in both my arms, and put the tip
of it with the utmost respect to my lip. She made me some general
questions about my country and my travels, which I answered as
distinctly, and in as few words as I could. She asked, “whether I could
be content to live at court?” I bowed down to the board of the table,
and humbly answered “that I was my master’s slave: but, if I were at my
own disposal, I should be proud to devote my life to her majesty’s
service.” She then asked my master, “whether he was willing to sell me
at a good price?” He, who apprehended I could not live a month, was
ready enough to part with me, and demanded a thousand pieces of gold,
which were ordered him on the spot, each piece being about the bigness
of eight hundred moidores; but allowing for the proportion of all
things between that country and Europe, and the high price of gold
among them, was hardly so great a sum as a thousand guineas would be in
England. I then said to the queen, “since I was now her majesty’s most
humble creature and vassal, I must beg the favour, that Glumdalclitch,
who had always tended me with so much care and kindness, and understood
to do it so well, might be admitted into her service, and continue to
be my nurse and instructor.”
Her majesty agreed to my petition, and easily got the farmer’s consent,
who was glad enough to have his daughter preferred at court, and the
poor girl herself was not able to hide her joy. My late master
withdrew, bidding me farewell, and saying he had left me in a good
service; to which I replied not a word, only making him a slight bow.
The queen observed my coldness; and, when the farmer was gone out of
the apartment, asked me the reason. I made bold to tell her majesty,
“that I owed no other obligation to my late master, than his not
dashing out the brains of a poor harmless creature, found by chance in
his fields: which obligation was amply recompensed, by the gain he had
made in showing me through half the kingdom, and the price he had now
sold me for. That the life I had since led was laborious enough to kill
an animal of ten times my strength. That my health was much impaired,
by the continual drudgery of entertaining the rabble every hour of the
day; and that, if my master had not thought my life in danger, her
majesty would not have got so cheap a bargain. But as I was out of all
fear of being ill-treated under the protection of so great and good an
empress, the ornament of nature, the darling of the world, the delight
of her subjects, the phœnix of the creation, so I hoped my late
master’s apprehensions would appear to be groundless; for I already
found my spirits revive, by the influence of her most august presence.”
This was the sum of my speech, delivered with great improprieties and
hesitation. The latter part was altogether framed in the style peculiar
to that people, whereof I learned some phrases from Glumdalclitch,
while she was carrying me to court.
The queen, giving great allowance for my defectiveness in speaking,
was, however, surprised at so much wit and good sense in so diminutive
an animal. She took me in her own hand, and carried me to the king, who
was then retired to his cabinet. His majesty, a prince of much gravity
and austere countenance, not well observing my shape at first view,
asked the queen after a cold manner “how long it was since she grew
fond of a _splacnuck_?” for such it seems he took me to be, as I lay
upon my breast in her majesty’s right hand. But this princess, who has
an infinite deal of wit and humour, set me gently on my feet upon the
scrutoire, and commanded me to give his majesty an account of myself,
which I did in a very few words: and Glumdalclitch who attended at the
cabinet door, and could not endure I should be out of her sight, being
admitted, confirmed all that had passed from my arrival at her father’s
house.
The king, although he be as learned a person as any in his dominions,
had been educated in the study of philosophy, and particularly
mathematics; yet when he observed my shape exactly, and saw me walk
erect, before I began to speak, conceived I might be a piece of
clock-work (which is in that country arrived to a very great
perfection) contrived by some ingenious artist. But when he heard my
voice, and found what I delivered to be regular and rational, he could
not conceal his astonishment. He was by no means satisfied with the
relation I gave him of the manner I came into his kingdom, but thought
it a story concerted between Glumdalclitch and her father, who had
taught me a set of words to make me sell at a better price. Upon this
imagination, he put several other questions to me, and still received
rational answers: no otherwise defective than by a foreign accent, and
an imperfect knowledge in the language, with some rustic phrases which
I had learned at the farmer’s house, and did not suit the polite style
of a court.
His majesty sent for three great scholars, who were then in their
weekly waiting, according to the custom in that country. These
gentlemen, after they had a while examined my shape with much nicety,
were of different opinions concerning me. They all agreed that I could
not be produced according to the regular laws of nature, because I was
not framed with a capacity of preserving my life, either by swiftness,
or climbing of trees, or digging holes in the earth. They observed by
my teeth, which they viewed with great exactness, that I was a
carnivorous animal; yet most quadrupeds being an overmatch for me, and
field mice, with some others, too nimble, they could not imagine how I
should be able to support myself, unless I fed upon snails and other
insects, which they offered, by many learned arguments, to evince that
I could not possibly do. One of these virtuosi seemed to think that I
might be an embryo, or abortive birth. But this opinion was rejected by
the other two, who observed my limbs to be perfect and finished; and
that I had lived several years, as it was manifest from my beard, the
stumps whereof they plainly discovered through a magnifying glass. They
would not allow me to be a dwarf, because my littleness was beyond all
degrees of comparison; for the queen’s favourite dwarf, the smallest