Gulliver's Travels into Several Remote Nations of the World
rendered the _Yahoos_ more odious, than their undistinguishing appetite
to devour every thing that came in their way, whether herbs, roots,
berries, the corrupted flesh of animals, or all mingled together: and
it was peculiar in their temper, that they were fonder of what they
could get by rapine or stealth, at a greater distance, than much better
food provided for them at home. If their prey held out, they would eat
till they were ready to burst; after which, nature had pointed out to
them a certain root that gave them a general evacuation.
“There was also another kind of root, very juicy, but somewhat rare and
difficult to be found, which the _Yahoos_ sought for with much
eagerness, and would suck it with great delight; it produced in them
the same effects that wine has upon us. It would make them sometimes
hug, and sometimes tear one another; they would howl, and grin, and
chatter, and reel, and tumble, and then fall asleep in the mud.”
I did indeed observe that the _Yahoos_ were the only animals in this
country subject to any diseases; which, however, were much fewer than
horses have among us, and contracted, not by any ill-treatment they
meet with, but by the nastiness and greediness of that sordid brute.
Neither has their language any more than a general appellation for
those maladies, which is borrowed from the name of the beast, and
called _hnea-yahoo_, or _Yahoo’s evil_; and the cure prescribed is a
mixture of their own dung and urine, forcibly put down the _Yahoo’s_
throat. This I have since often known to have been taken with success,
and do here freely recommend it to my countrymen for the public good,
as an admirable specific against all diseases produced by repletion.
“As to learning, government, arts, manufactures, and the like,” my
master confessed, “he could find little or no resemblance between the
_Yahoos_ of that country and those in ours; for he only meant to
observe what parity there was in our natures. He had heard, indeed,
some curious _Houyhnhnms_ observe, that in most herds there was a sort
of ruling _Yahoo_ (as among us there is generally some leading or
principal stag in a park), who was always more deformed in body, and
mischievous in disposition, than any of the rest; that this leader had
usually a favourite as like himself as he could get, whose employment
was to lick his master’s feet and posteriors, and drive the female
_Yahoos_ to his kennel; for which he was now and then rewarded with a
piece of ass’s flesh. This favourite is hated by the whole herd, and
therefore, to protect himself, keeps always near the person of his
leader. He usually continues in office till a worse can be found; but
the very moment he is discarded, his successor, at the head of all the
_Yahoos_ in that district, young and old, male and female, come in a
body, and discharge their excrements upon him from head to foot. But
how far this might be applicable to our courts, and favourites, and
ministers of state, my master said I could best determine.”
I durst make no return to this malicious insinuation, which debased
human understanding below the sagacity of a common hound, who has
judgment enough to distinguish and follow the cry of the ablest dog in
the pack, without being ever mistaken.
My master told me, “there were some qualities remarkable in the
_Yahoos_, which he had not observed me to mention, or at least very
slightly, in the accounts I had given of humankind.” He said, “those
animals, like other brutes, had their females in common; but in this
they differed, that the she _Yahoo_ would admit the males while she was
pregnant; and that the hes would quarrel and fight with the females, as
fiercely as with each other; both which practices were such degrees of
infamous brutality, as no other sensitive creature ever arrived at.
“Another thing he wondered at in the _Yahoos_, was their strange
disposition to nastiness and dirt; whereas there appears to be a
natural love of cleanliness in all other animals.” As to the two former
accusations, I was glad to let them pass without any reply, because I
had not a word to offer upon them in defence of my species, which
otherwise I certainly had done from my own inclinations. But I could
have easily vindicated humankind from the imputation of singularity
upon the last article, if there had been any swine in that country (as
unluckily for me there were not), which, although it may be a sweeter
quadruped than a _Yahoo_, cannot, I humbly conceive, in justice,
pretend to more cleanliness; and so his honour himself must have owned,
if he had seen their filthy way of feeding, and their custom of
wallowing and sleeping in the mud.
My master likewise mentioned another quality which his servants had
discovered in several Yahoos, and to him was wholly unaccountable. He
said, “a fancy would sometimes take a _Yahoo_ to retire into a corner,
to lie down, and howl, and groan, and spurn away all that came near
him, although he were young and fat, wanted neither food nor water, nor
did the servant imagine what could possibly ail him. And the only
remedy they found was, to set him to hard work, after which he would
infallibly come to himself.” To this I was silent out of partiality to
my own kind; yet here I could plainly discover the true seeds of
spleen, which only seizes on the lazy, the luxurious, and the rich;
who, if they were forced to undergo the same regimen, I would undertake
for the cure.
His honour had further observed, “that a female _Yahoo_ would often
stand behind a bank or a bush, to gaze on the young males passing by,
and then appear, and hide, using many antic gestures and grimaces, at
which time it was observed that she had a most offensive smell; and
when any of the males advanced, would slowly retire, looking often
back, and with a counterfeit show of fear, run off into some convenient
place, where she knew the male would follow her.
“At other times, if a female stranger came among them, three or four of
her own sex would get about her, and stare, and chatter, and grin, and
smell her all over; and then turn off with gestures, that seemed to
express contempt and disdain.”
Perhaps my master might refine a little in these speculations, which he
had drawn from what he observed himself, or had been told him by
others; however, I could not reflect without some amazement, and much
sorrow, that the rudiments of lewdness, coquetry, censure, and scandal,
should have place by instinct in womankind.
I expected every moment that my master would accuse the _Yahoos_ of
those unnatural appetites in both sexes, so common among us. But
nature, it seems, has not been so expert a school-mistress; and these
politer pleasures are entirely the productions of art and reason on our
side of the globe.
CHAPTER VIII.
The author relates several particulars of the _Yahoos_. The great
virtues of the _Houyhnhnms_. The education and exercise of their youth.
Their general assembly.
As I ought to have understood human nature much better than I supposed
it possible for my master to do, so it was easy to apply the character
he gave of the _Yahoos_ to myself and my countrymen; and I believed I
could yet make further discoveries, from my own observation. I
therefore often begged his honour to let me go among the herds of
_Yahoos_ in the neighbourhood; to which he always very graciously
consented, being perfectly convinced that the hatred I bore these
brutes would never suffer me to be corrupted by them; and his honour
ordered one of his servants, a strong sorrel nag, very honest and
good-natured, to be my guard; without whose protection I durst not
undertake such adventures. For I have already told the reader how much
I was pestered by these odious animals, upon my first arrival; and I
afterwards failed very narrowly, three or four times, of falling into
their clutches, when I happened to stray at any distance without my
hanger. And I have reason to believe they had some imagination that I
was of their own species, which I often assisted myself by stripping up
my sleeves, and showing my naked arms and breast in their sight, when
my protector was with me. At which times they would approach as near as
they durst, and imitate my actions after the manner of monkeys, but
ever with great signs of hatred; as a tame jackdaw with cap and
stockings is always persecuted by the wild ones, when he happens to be
got among them.
They are prodigiously nimble from their infancy. However, I once caught
a young male of three years old, and endeavoured, by all marks of
tenderness, to make it quiet; but the little imp fell a squalling and
scratching and biting with such violence, that I was forced to let it
go; and it was high time, for a whole troop of old ones came about us
at the noise, but finding the cub was safe (for away it ran), and my
sorrel nag being by, they durst not venture near us. I observed the
young animal’s flesh to smell very rank, and the stink was somewhat
between a weasel and a fox, but much more disagreeable. I forgot
another circumstance (and perhaps I might have the reader’s pardon if
it were wholly omitted), that while I held the odious vermin in my
hands, it voided its filthy excrements of a yellow liquid substance all
over my clothes; but by good fortune there was a small brook hard by,
where I washed myself as clean as I could; although I durst not come
into my master’s presence until I were sufficiently aired.
By what I could discover, the _Yahoos_ appear to be the most
unteachable of all animals, their capacity never reaching higher than
to draw or carry burdens. Yet I am of opinion this defect arises
chiefly from a perverse, restive disposition; for they are cunning,
malicious, treacherous, and revengeful. They are strong and hardy, but
of a cowardly spirit, and, by consequence, insolent, abject, and cruel.
It is observed, that the red haired of both sexes are more libidinous
and mischievous than the rest, whom yet they much exceed in strength
and activity.
The _Houyhnhnms_ keep the _Yahoos_ for present use in huts not far from
the house; but the rest are sent abroad to certain fields, where they
dig up roots, eat several kinds of herbs, and search about for carrion,
or sometimes catch weasels and _luhimuhs_ (a sort of wild rat), which
they greedily devour. Nature has taught them to dig deep holes with
their nails on the side of a rising ground, wherein they lie by
themselves; only the kennels of the females are larger, sufficient to
hold two or three cubs.
They swim from their infancy like frogs, and are able to continue long
under water, where they often take fish, which the females carry home
to their young. And, upon this occasion, I hope the reader will pardon
my relating an odd adventure.
Being one day abroad with my protector the sorrel nag, and the weather
exceeding hot, I entreated him to let me bathe in a river that was
near. He consented, and I immediately stripped myself stark naked, and
went down softly into the stream. It happened that a young female
_Yahoo_, standing behind a bank, saw the whole proceeding, and inflamed
by desire, as the nag and I conjectured, came running with all speed,
and leaped into the water, within five yards of the place where I
bathed. I was never in my life so terribly frightened. The nag was
grazing at some distance, not suspecting any harm. She embraced me
after a most fulsome manner. I roared as loud as I could, and the nag
came galloping towards me, whereupon she quitted her grasp, with the
utmost reluctancy, and leaped upon the opposite bank, where she stood
gazing and howling all the time I was putting on my clothes.
This was a matter of diversion to my master and his family, as well as
of mortification to myself. For now I could no longer deny that I was a