Main Street
intruding! I see the whole thing as he does, because of all I've told
you. Maybe it's shameless to bare my heart this way, but I do it for
him--for him and you!”
Carol understood that Vida believed herself to have recited minutely and
brazenly a story of intimate love; understood that, in alarm, she was
trying to cover her shame as she struggled on, “Liked him in the most
honorable way--simply can't help it if I still see things through
his eyes----If I gave him up, I certainly am not beyond my rights
in demanding that you take care to avoid even the appearance of evil
and----” She was weeping; an insignificant, flushed, ungracefully
weeping woman.
Carol could not endure it. She ran to Vida, kissed her forehead,
comforted her with a murmur of dove-like sounds, sought to reassure her
with worn and hastily assembled gifts of words: “Oh, I appreciate it so
much,” and “You are so fine and splendid,” and “Let me assure you there
isn't a thing to what you've heard,” and “Oh, indeed, I do know how
sincere Will is, and as you say, so--so sincere.”
Vida believed that she had explained many deep and devious matters. She
came out of her hysteria like a sparrow shaking off rain-drops. She sat
up, and took advantage of her victory:
“I don't want to rub it in, but you can see for yourself now, this is
all a result of your being so discontented and not appreciating the dear
good people here. And another thing: People like you and me, who want to
reform things, have to be particularly careful about appearances. Think
how much better you can criticize conventional customs if you yourself
live up to them, scrupulously. Then people can't say you're attacking
them to excuse your own infractions.”
To Carol was given a sudden great philosophical understanding, an
explanation of half the cautious reforms in history. “Yes. I've heard
that plea. It's a good one. It sets revolts aside to cool. It keeps
strays in the flock. To word it differently: 'You must live up to the
popular code if you believe in it; but if you don't believe in it, then
you MUST live up to it!'”
“I don't think so at all,” said Vida vaguely. She began to look hurt,
and Carol let her be oracular.
III
Vida had done her a service; had made all agonizing seem so fatuous that
she ceased writhing and saw that her whole problem was simple as mutton:
she was interested in Erik's aspiration; interest gave her a hesitating
fondness for him; and the future would take care of the event. . . .
But at night, thinking in bed, she protested, “I'm not a falsely
accused innocent, though! If it were some one more resolute than Erik, a
fighter, an artist with bearded surly lips----They're only in books.
Is that the real tragedy, that I never shall know tragedy, never find
anything but blustery complications that turn out to be a farce?
“No one big enough or pitiful enough to sacrifice for. Tragedy in
neat blouses; the eternal flame all nice and safe in a kerosene stove.
Neither heroic faith nor heroic guilt. Peeping at love from behind lace
curtains--on Main Street!”
Aunt Bessie crept in next day, tried to pump her, tried to prime the
pump by again hinting that Kennicott might have his own affairs. Carol
snapped, “Whatever I may do, I'll have you to understand that Will is
only too safe!” She wished afterward that she had not been so lofty. How
much would Aunt Bessie make of “Whatever I may do?”
When Kennicott came home he poked at things, and hemmed, and brought
out, “Saw aunty, this afternoon. She said you weren't very polite to
her.”
Carol laughed. He looked at her in a puzzled way and fled to his
newspaper.
IV
She lay sleepless. She alternately considered ways of leaving Kennicott,
and remembered his virtues, pitied his bewilderment in face of the
subtle corroding sicknesses which he could not dose nor cut out. Didn't
he perhaps need her more than did the book-solaced Erik? Suppose Will
were to die, suddenly. Suppose she never again saw him at breakfast,
silent but amiable, listening to her chatter. Suppose he never again
played elephant for Hugh. Suppose----A country call, a slippery road,
his motor skidding, the edge of the road crumbling, the car turning
turtle, Will pinned beneath, suffering, brought home maimed, looking at
her with spaniel eyes--or waiting for her, calling for her, while she
was in Chicago, knowing nothing of it. Suppose he were sued by some
vicious shrieking woman for malpractice. He tried to get witnesses;
Westlake spread lies; his friends doubted him; his self-confidence was
so broken that it was horrible to see the indecision of the decisive
man; he was convicted, handcuffed, taken on a train----
She ran to his room. At her nervous push the door swung sharply in,
struck a chair. He awoke, gasped, then in a steady voice: “What is it,
dear? Anything wrong?” She darted to him, fumbled for the familiar harsh
bristly cheek. How well she knew it, every seam, and hardness of bone,
and roll of fat! Yet when he sighed, “This is a nice visit,” and dropped
his hand on her thin-covered shoulder, she said, too cheerily, “I
thought I heard you moaning. So silly of me. Good night, dear.”
V
She did not see Erik for a fortnight, save once at church and once when
she went to the tailor shop to talk over the plans, contingencies, and
strategy of Kennicott's annual campaign for getting a new suit. Nat
Hicks was there, and he was not so deferential as he had been. With
unnecessary jauntiness he chuckled, “Some nice flannels, them
samples, heh?” Needlessly he touched her arm to call attention to the
fashion-plates, and humorously he glanced from her to Erik. At home she
wondered if the little beast might not be suggesting himself as a rival
to Erik, but that abysmal bedragglement she would not consider.
She saw Juanita Haydock slowly walking past the house--as Mrs. Westlake
had once walked past.
She met Mrs. Westlake in Uncle Whittier's store, and before that alert
stare forgot her determination to be rude, and was shakily cordial.
She was sure that all the men on the street, even Guy Pollock and Sam
Clark, leered at her in an interested hopeful way, as though she were
a notorious divorcee. She felt as insecure as a shadowed criminal. She
wished to see Erik, and wished that she had never seen him. She fancied
that Kennicott was the only person in town who did not know all--know
incomparably more than there was to know--about herself and Erik. She
crouched in her chair as she imagined men talking of her, thick-voiced,
obscene, in barber shops and the tobacco-stinking pool parlor.
Through early autumn Fern Mullins was the only person who broke the
suspense. The frivolous teacher had come to accept Carol as of her
own youth, and though school had begun she rushed in daily to suggest
dances, welsh-rabbit parties.
Fern begged her to go as chaperon to a barn-dance in the country, on a
Saturday evening. Carol could not go. The next day, the storm crashed.
CHAPTER XXXII
I
CAROL was on the back porch, tightening a bolt on the baby's go-cart,
this Sunday afternoon. Through an open window of the Bogart house she
heard a screeching, heard Mrs. Bogart's haggish voice:
“ . . . did too, and there's no use your denying it no you don't, you march
yourself right straight out of the house . . . never in my life heard of
such . . . never had nobody talk to me like . . . walk in the ways of sin
and nastiness . . . leave your clothes here, and heaven knows that's more
than you deserve . . . any of your lip or I'll call the policeman.”
The voice of the other interlocutor Carol did not catch, nor, though
Mrs. Bogart was proclaiming that he was her confidant and present
assistant, did she catch the voice of Mrs. Bogart's God.
“Another row with Cy,” Carol inferred.
She trundled the go-cart down the back steps and tentatively wheeled it
across the yard, proud of her repairs. She heard steps on the sidewalk.
She saw not Cy Bogart but Fern Mullins, carrying a suit-case, hurrying
up the street with her head low. The widow, standing on the porch with
buttery arms akimbo, yammered after the fleeing girl:
“And don't you dare show your face on this block again. You can send the
drayman for your trunk. My house has been contaminated long enough. Why
the Lord should afflict me----”
Fern was gone. The righteous widow glared, banged into the house, came
out poking at her bonnet, marched away. By this time Carol was staring
in a manner not visibly to be distinguished from the window-peeping of
the rest of Gopher Prairie. She saw Mrs. Bogart enter the Howland house,
then the Casses'. Not till suppertime did she reach the Kennicotts. The
doctor answered her ring, and greeted her, “Well, well? how's the good
neighbor?”
The good neighbor charged into the living-room, waving the most unctuous
of black kid gloves and delightedly sputtering:
“You may well ask how I am! I really do wonder how I could go through
the awful scenes of this day--and the impudence I took from that woman's
tongue, that ought to be cut out----”
“Whoa! Whoa! Hold up!” roared Kennicott. “Who's the hussy, Sister
Bogart? Sit down and take it cool and tell us about it.”
“I can't sit down, I must hurry home, but I couldn't devote myself to my
own selfish cares till I'd warned you, and heaven knows I don't expect
any thanks for trying to warn the town against her, there's always so
much evil in the world that folks simply won't see or appreciate your
trying to safeguard them----And forcing herself in here to get in with
you and Carrie, many 's the time I've seen her doing it, and, thank
heaven, she was found out in time before she could do any more harm, it
simply breaks my heart and prostrates me to think what she may have done
already, even if some of us that understand and know about things----”
“Whoa-up! Who are you talking about?”
“She's talking about Fern Mullins,” Carol put in, not pleasantly.
“Huh?”
Kennicott was incredulous.
“I certainly am!” flourished Mrs. Bogart, “and good and thankful you
may be that I found her out in time, before she could get YOU into
something, Carol, because even if you are my neighbor and Will's wife
and a cultured lady, let me tell you right now, Carol Kennicott, that
you ain't always as respectful to--you ain't as reverent--you don't
stick by the good old ways like they was laid down for us by God in the
Bible, and while of course there ain't a bit of harm in having a good
laugh, and I know there ain't any real wickedness in you, yet just the
same you don't fear God and hate the transgressors of his commandments
like you ought to, and you may be thankful I found out this serpent I
nourished in my bosom--and oh yes! oh yes indeed! my lady must have
two eggs every morning for breakfast, and eggs sixty cents a dozen, and
wa'n't satisfied with one, like most folks--what did she care how much
they cost or if a person couldn't make hardly nothing on her board and
room, in fact I just took her in out of charity and I might have known
from the kind of stockings and clothes that she sneaked into my house in
her trunk----”
Before they got her story she had five more minutes of obscene
wallowing. The gutter comedy turned into high tragedy, with Nemesis
in black kid gloves. The actual story was simple, depressing, and
unimportant. As to details Mrs. Bogart was indefinite, and angry that
she should be questioned.
Fern Mullins and Cy had, the evening before, driven alone to a
barn-dance in the country. (Carol brought out the admission that Fern
had tried to get a chaperon.) At the dance Cy had kissed Fern--she
confessed that. Cy had obtained a pint of whisky; he said that he didn't
remember where he had got it; Mrs. Bogart implied that Fern had given