Memoirs of Fanny Hill
that took, and carrying his hands to my breasts, I press it tenderly to
them. They were now finely furnished, and raised in flesh, so that,
panting with desire, they rose and fell, in quick heaves, under his
touch: at this, the boy’s eyes began to lighten with all the fires of
inflamed nature, and his cheeks flushed with a deep scarlet:
tongue-tied with joy, rapture, and bashfulness, he could not speak, but
then his looks, his emotion, sufficiently satisfied me that my train
had taken, and that I had no disappointment to fear.
My lips, which I threw in his way, so that he could not escape kissing
them, fixed, fired, and emboldened him: and now, glancing my eyes
towards that part of his dress which covered the essential object of
enjoyment, I plainly discovered the swell and commotion there; and as I
was now too far advanced to stop in so fair a way, and was indeed no
longer able to contain myself, or wait the slower progress of his
maiden bash-fulness (for such it seemed, and really was), I stole my
hands upon his thighs, down one of which I could both see and feel a
stiff hard body, confined by his breeches, that my fingers could
discover no end to. Curious then, and eager to unfold so alarming a
mystery, playing, as it were, with his buttons, which were bursting
ripe from the active force within, those of his waistband and fore-flap
flew open at a touch, when out IT started; and now, disengaged from the
shirt, I saw, with wonder and surprise, what? not the play thing of a
boy, not the weapon of a man, but a Maypole, of so enormous a standard,
that had proportions been observed, it must have belonged to a young
giant. Yet I could not, without pleasure, behold, and even venture to
feel, such a length, such a breadth of animated ivory! perfectly well
turned and fashioned, the proud stiffness of which distented its skin,
whose smooth polish and velvet softness might vie with that of the most
delicate of our sex, and whose exquisite whiteness was not a little set
off by a sprout of black curling hair round the root: through the jetty
springs of which the fair skin shewed as in a fine evening you may have
remarked the clear light through the branchwork of distant trees
over-topping the summit of a hill: then the broad of blueish-casted
incarnate of the head, and blue serpentines of its veins, altogether
composed the most striking assemblage of figure and colours in nature.
In short, it stood an object of terror and delight.
But what was yet more surprising, the owner of this natural curiosity,
through the want of occasions in the strictness of his home breeding,
and the little time he had been in town not having afforded him one;
was hitherto an absolute stranger, in practice at least, to the use of
all that manhood he was so nobly stocked with; and it now fell to my
lot to stand his first trial of it, if I could resolve to run the risks
of its disproportion to that tender part of me, which such an oversized
machine was very fit to lay in ruins.
But it was now of the latest to deliberate, for, by this time, the
young fellow, over heated with the present objects, and too high metled
to be longer curbed in by that modesty and awe which had hitherto
restrained him, ventured, under the stronger impulse, and instructive
promptership of nature alone, to slip his hands, trembling with eager
impetuous desires, under my petticoats; and seeing, I suppose, nothing
extremely severe in my looks, to stop or dash him, he feels out, and
seizes, gently, the center spot of his ardours. Oh then! the fiery
touch of his lingers determines me, and my fears melting away before
the glowing intolerable heat, my thighs disclose of themselves, and
yield all liberty to his hand: and now, a favourable movement giving my
petticoats a toss, the avenue lay too fair, too open to be missed. He
is now upon me: I had placed myself with a jerk under him, as
commodious and open as possible to his attempts, which were untoward
enough, for his machine, meeting with no inlet, bore and battered
stiffly against me in random pushes, now above, now below, now beside
his point; till, burning with impatience from its irritating touches, I
guided gently, with my hand, this furious fescue to where my young
novice was now to be taught his first lesson of pleasure. Thus he
nicked, at length, the warm and insufficient orifice; but he was made
to find no breach impracticable, and mine, though so often entered, was
still far from wide enough to take him easily in.
By my direction, however, the head of his unwieldy machine was so
critically pointed, that, feeling him fore-right against the tender
opening, a favourable motion from me met his timely thrust, by which
the lips of it, strenuously dilated, gave way to his thus assisted
impetuosity, so that we might both feel that he had gained a lodgment.
Pursuing then his point, he soon, by violent, and, to me, most painful
piercing thrusts, wedges himself at length so far in, as to be now
tolerably secure of his entrance: here he stuck, and I now felt such a
mixture of pleasure and pain, as there is no giving a definition of. I
dreaded alike his splitting me farther up, or his withdrawing; I could
not bear either to keep or part with him. The sense of pain, however,
prevailing, from his prodigious size and stiffness, acting upon me in
those continued rapid thrusts, with which he furiously pursued his
penetration, made me cry out gently: “Oh, my dear, you hurt me!” This
was enough to check the tender respectful boy even in his mid-career;
and he immediately drew out the sweet cause of my complaint, whilst his
eyes eloquently expressed, at once, his grief for hurting me, and his
reluctance at dislodging from quarters, of which the warmth and
closeness had given him a gust of pleasure, that he was now desire mad
to satisfy, and yet too much a novice not to be afraid of my
withholding his relief, on account of the pain he had put me to.
But I was, myself, far from being pleased with his having too much
regarded my tender exclaims; for now, more fired with the object before
me, as it still stood with the fiercest erection, unbonneted, and
displayed its broad vermilion head, I first gave the youth a
re-encouraging kiss, which he repaid me with a fervour that seemed at
once to thank me, and bribe my further compliance; and soon replaced
myself in a posture to receive, at all risk, the renewed invasion,
which he did not delay an instant: for, being presently remounted, I
once more felt the smooth hard gristle forcing an entrance, which he
achieved rather easier than before. Pained, however, as I was, with his
efforts of gaining a complete admission, which he was so regardful as
to manage by gentle degrees, I took care not to complain. In the mean
time, the soft strait passage gradually loosens, yields, and, stretched
to its utmost bearing, by the stick, thick, indriven engine, sensible,
at once, to the ravishing pleasure of the feel and the pain of the
distension, let him in about half way, when all the most nervous
activity he now exerted, to further his penetration, gained him not an
inch of his purpose: for, whilst he hesitated there, the crisis of
pleasure overtook him, and the close compressure of the warm
surrounding flow drew from him the ecstatic gush, even before mine was
ready to meet it, kept up by the pain I had endured in the course of
the engagement, from the insufferable size of his weapon, though it was
not as yet in above half its length.
I expected then, but without wishing it, that he would draw, but was
pleasingly disappointed: for he was not to be let off so. The well
breathed youth, hot-mettled, and flush with genial juices, was now
fairly in for making me know my driver. As soon, then, as he had made a
short pause, waking, as it were, out of the trance of pleasure (in
which every sense seemed lost for a while, whilst, with his eyes shut,
and short quick breathings, he had yielded down his maiden tribute), he
still kept his post, yet unsated with enjoyment, and solacing in these
so new delights; till his stiffness, which had scarce perceptibly
remitted, being thoroughly recovered to him, who had not once
unsheathed, he proceeded afresh to cleave and open to himself an entire
entry into me, which was not a little made easy to him by the balsamic
injection, with: which he had just plentifully moistened the whole
internals of the passage. Redoubling, then, the active energy of his
thrusts, favoured by the fervid appetency of my motions, the soft oiled
wards can no longer stand so effectual a picklock, but yield, and open
him an entrance. And now, with conspiring nature, and my industry,
strong to aid him, he pierces, penetrates, and at length, winning his
way inch by inch, gets entirely in, and finally, a home made thrust
sheaths it up to the guard; on the information of which, from the close
jointure of our bodies (insomuch that the hair on both sides perfectly
interweaved and incircled together), the eyes of the transported youth
sparkled with more joyous fires, and all his looks and motions
acknowledged excess of pleasure, which I now began to share, for I felt
him in my very vitals! I was quite sick with delight! stirred beyond
bearing with its furious agitations within me, and gorged and crammed,
even to a surfeit. Thus I lay gasping, panting under him, till his
broken breathings, faultering accents, eyes twinkling with humid fires,
lunges more furious, and an increased stiffness, gave me to hail the
approaches of the second period: it came... and the sweet youth,
overpowered with the ecstasy, died away in my arms, melting a flood
that shot in genial warmth into the innermost recesses of my body;
every conduit of which, dedicated to that pleasure, was on flow to mix
with it. Thus we continued for some instants, lost, breathless,
senseless of every thing, and in every part but those favourite ones of
nature, in which all that we enjoyed of life and sensation was now
totally concentered.
When our mutual trance was a little over, and the young fellow had
withdrawn that delicious stretcher, with which he had most plentifully
drowned all thoughts of revenge, in the sense of actual pleasure, the
widened wounded passage refunded a stream of pearly liquids, which
flowed down my thighs, mixed with streaks of blood, the marks of the
ravage of that monstrous machine of his, which had now triumphed over a
kind of second maidenhead. I stole, however, my handkerchief to those
parts, and wiped them as dry as I could, whilst he was re-adjusting and
buttoning up.
I made him sit down by me, and as he had gathered courage from such
extreme intimacy, he gave me an aftercourse of pleasure, in a natural
burst of tender gratitude and joy, at the new scenes of bliss I had
opened to him: scenes positively new, as he had never before had the
least acquaintance with that mysterious mark, the cloven stamp of
female distinction, though nobody better qualified than he to penetrate
into its deepest recesses, or do it nobler justice. But when, by
certain motions, certain unquietness of his hands, that wandered not
without design, I found he languished for satisfying a curiosity,
natural enough, to view and handle those parts which attract and
concenter the warmest force of imagination, charmed, as I was, to have
any occasion of obliging and humouring his young desires, I suffered
him to proceed as he pleased, without check or control, to the
satisfaction of them.
Easily, then, reading in my eyes the full permission of myself to all
his wishes, he scarce pleased himself more than me; when, having
insinuated his hand under my petticoat and shift, he presently removed
those bars to the sight, by slily lifting them upwards, under favour of
a thousand kisses, which he thought, perhaps, necessary to divert my