Pamela, or Virtue Rewarded

you and I!—And then he laughed again, and repeated—I can’t scold, quoth-a! but, by gad, miss, you can speak d——d spiteful words, I can tell you that!—Poor Beck, poor Beck!—‘Fore gad, she’s quite dumbfoundered! Well, but Pamela, said my lady, come hither, and tell me truly, Dost thou think thyself really married?—Said I, and approached her chair, My good lady, I’ll answer all your commands, if you’ll have patience with me, and not be so angry as you are: But I can’t bear to be used thus by this gentleman, and your ladyship’s woman. Child, said she, thou art very impertinent to my kinsman; thou can’st not be civil to me; and my ladyship’s woman is much thy betters. But that’s not the thing!—Dost thou think thou art really married? I see, madam, said I, you are resolved not to be pleased with any answer I shall return: If I should say, I am not, then your ladyship will call me hard names, and, perhaps, I should tell a fib. If I should say, I am, your ladyship will ask, how I have the impudence to be so?—and will call it a sham-marriage. I will, said she, be answered more directly. Why, what, madam, does it signify what I think? Your ladyship will believe as you please. But can’st thou have the vanity, the pride, the folly, said she, to think thyself actually married to my brother? He is no fool, child; and libertine enough of conscience; and thou art not the first in the list of his credulous harlots.—Well, well, said I, (and was in a sad flutter,) as I am easy, and pleased with my lot, pray, madam, let me continue so, as long as I can. It will be time enough for me to know the worst, when the worst comes. And if it should be so bad, your ladyship should pity me, rather than thus torment me before my time. Well, said she, but dost not think I am concerned, that a young wench, whom my poor dear mother loved so well, should thus cast herself away, and suffer herself to be deluded and undone, after such a noble stand as thou madst for so long a time? I think myself far from being deluded and undone, and am as innocent and virtuous as ever I was in my life. Thou liest, child, said she. So your ladyship told me twice before. She gave me a slap on the hand for this; and I made a low courtesy, and said, I humbly thank your ladyship! but I could not refrain tears: And added, Your dear brother, madam, however, won’t thank your ladyship for this usage of me, though I do. Come a little nearer me, my dear, said she, and thou shalt have a little more than that to tell him of, if thou think’st thou hast not made mischief enough already between a sister and brother. But, child, if he was here, I would serve thee worse, and him too. I wish he was, said I.—Dost thou threaten me, mischief-maker, and insolent as thou art? Now, pray, madam, said I, (but got to a little distance,) be pleased to reflect upon all that you have said to me, since I have had the honour, or rather misfortune, to come into your presence; whether you have said one thing befitting your ladyship’s degree to me, even supposing I was the wench and the creature you imagine me to be?—Come hither, my pert dear, replied she, come but within my reach for one moment, and I’ll answer thee as thou deservest. To be sure she meant to box my ears. But I should not be worthy my happy lot if I could not shew some spirit. When the cloth was taken away, I said, I suppose I may now depart your presence, madam? I suppose not, said she. Why, I’ll lay thee a wager, child, thy stomach’s too full to eat, and so thou may’st fast till thy mannerly master comes home. Pray your ladyship, said her woman, let the poor girl sit down at table with Mrs. Jewkes and me.—Said I, You are very kind, Mrs. Worden; but times, as you said, are much altered with me; and I have been of late so much honoured with better company, that I can’t stoop to yours. Was ever such confidence! said my lady.—Poor Beck! poor Beck! said her kinsman; why she beats you quite out of the pit!—Will your ladyship, said I, be so good as to tell me how long I am to tarry? For you’ll please to see by that letter, that I am obliged to attend my master’s commands. And so I gave her the dear gentleman’s letter from Mr. Carlton’s, which I thought would make her use me better, as she might judge by it of the honour done me by him. Ay, said she, this is my worthy brother’s hand. It is directed to Mrs. Andrews. That’s to you, I suppose, child? And so she ran on, making remarks as she went along, in this manner: My dearest PAMELA,—‘Mighty well!’—I hope my not coming home this night, will not frighten you!—‘Vastly tender, indeed!—And did it frighten you, child?’—You may believe I can’t help it. ‘No, to be sure!—A person in thy way of life, is more tenderly used than an honest wife. But mark the end of it!’—I could have wished—‘Pr’ythee, Jackey, mind this,’—we—‘mind the significant we,’—had not engaged to the good neighbourhood, at Sir Simon’s, for to-morrow night.—‘Why, does the good neighbourhood, and does Sir Simon, permit thy visits, child? They shall have none of mine, then, I’ll assure them!’—But I am so desirous to set out on Wednesday for the other house—‘So, Jackey, but we just nicked it, I find:’—that, as well as in return for the civilities of so many good friends, who will be there on purpose, I would not put it off.—‘Now mind, Jackey.’—What I beg of you—‘Mind the wretch, that could use me and your uncle as he has done; he is turned beggar to this creature!’—I beg of you, therefore, my dear—‘My dear! there’s for you!—I wish I may not be quite sick before I get through.’—What I beg of you, therefore, my dear, [and then she looked me full in the face,] is, that you will go in the chariot to Sir Simon’s, the sooner in the day the better;—‘Dear heart! and why so, when WE were not expected till night? Why, pray observe the reason—Hem!’ [said she]—Because you will be diverted with the company;—‘Mighty kind, indeed!’—who all—‘Jackey, Jackey, mind this,’—who all so much admire you. ‘Now he’d ha’ been hanged before he would have said so complaisant a thing, had he been married, I’m sure!’—Very true, aunt, said he: A plain case that!—[Thought I, that’s hard upon poor matrimony, though I hope my lady don’t find it so. But I durst not speak out.]—Who all so much admire you, [said she,] ‘I must repeat that—Pretty miss!—I wish thou wast as admirable for thy virtue, as for that baby-face of thine!’—And I hope to join you there by your tea-time in the afternoon!—‘So, you’re in very good time, child, an hour or two hence, to answer all your important pre-engagements!’—which will be better than going home, and returning with you; as it will be six miles difference to me; and I know the good company will excuse my dress on this occasion.—‘Very true; any dress is good enough, I’m sure, for such company as admire thee, child, for a companion, in thy ruined state!—Jackey, Jackey, mind, mind, again! more fine things still!’—I count every hour of this little absence for a day!—‘There’s for you! Let me repeat it’—I count every hour of this little absence for a day!—‘Mind, too, the wit of the good man! One may see love is a new thing to him. Here is a very tedious time gone since he saw his deary; no less than, according to his amorous calculation, a dozen days and nights, at least! and yet, TEDIOUS as it is, it is but a LITTLE ABSENCE. Well said, my good, accurate, and consistent brother!—But wise men in love are always the greatest simpletons!—But now cones the reason why this LITTLE ABSENCE, which, at the same time, is SO GREAT an ABSENCE, is so tedious:’—FOR I am—‘Ay, now for it!’—with the UTMOST sincerity, my dearest love—‘Out upon DEAREST love! I shall never love the word again! Pray bid your uncle never call me dearest love, Jackey!’—For ever yours!—‘But, brother, thou liest!—Thou knowest thou dost.—And so, my good Lady Andrews, or what shall I call you? Your dearest love will be for ever yours! And hast thou the vanity to believe this?—But stay, here is a postscript. The poor man knew not when to have done to his dearest love.—He’s sadly in for’t, truly! Why, his dearest love, you are mighty happy in such a lover!’—If you could go to dine with them—‘Cry you mercy, my dearest love, now comes the pre-engagement!’—it will be a freedom that will be very pleasing to them, and the more, as they don’t expect it. Well, so much for this kind letter! But you see you cannot honour this admiring company with this little expected, and, but in complaisance to his folly, I dare say, little desired freedom. And I cannot forbear admiring you so much myself, my dearest love, that I will not spare you at all, this whole evening: For ’tis a little hard, if thy master’s sister may not be blest a little bit with thy charming company. So I found I had shewn her my letter to very little purpose, and repented it several times, as she read on.—Well, then, said I, I hope your ladyship will give me leave to send my excuses to your good brother, and say, that your ladyship is come, and is so fond of me, that you will not let me leave you.—Pretty creature, said she; and wantest thou thy good master to come, and quarrel with his sister on thy account?—But thou shalt not stir from my presence; and I would now ask thee, What it is thou meanest by shewing me this letter?—Why, madam, said I, to shew your ladyship how I was engaged for this day and evening.—And for nothing else? said she. Why, I can’t tell, madam, said I: But if you can collect from it any other circumstances, I might hope I should not be the worse treated. I saw her eyes began to sparkle with passion: and she took my hand, and said, grasping it very hard, I know, confident creature, that thou shewedst it me to insult me!—You shewed it me, to let me see, that he could be civiller to a beggar born, than to me, or to my good Lord Davers!—You shewed it me, as if you’d have me to be as credulous a fool as yourself, to believe your marriage true, when I know the whole trick of it, and have reason to believe you do too; and you shewed it me, to upbraid me with his stooping to such painted dirt, to the disgrace of a family, ancient and untainted beyond most in the kingdom. And now will I give thee one hundred guineas for one bold word, that I may fell thee at my foot! Was not this very dreadful! To be sure, I had better have kept the letter from her. I was quite frightened!—And this fearful menace, and her fiery eyes, and rageful countenance, made me lose all my courage.—So I said, weeping, Good your ladyship, pity me!—Indeed I am honest; indeed I am virtuous; indeed I would not do a bad thing for the world! Though I know, said she, the whole trick of thy pretended marriage, and thy foolish ring here, and all the rest of the wicked nonsense, yet I should not have patience with thee, if thou shouldst but offer to let me know thy vanity prompts thee to believe thou art married to my brother!—I could not bear the thought!—So take care, Pamela; take care, beggarly brat; take care. Good madam, said I, spare my dear parents. They are honest and industrious: they were once in a very creditable way, and never were beggars. Misfortunes may attend any body: And I can bear the cruellest imputations on myself, because I know my innocence; but upon such honest, industrious parents, who went through the greatest trials, without being beholden to any thing but God’s blessing, and their own hard labour; I cannot bear reflection. What! art thou setting up for a family, creature as thou art! God give me patience with thee! I suppose my brother’s folly, and his wickedness, together, will, in a little while, occasion a search at the heralds’ office, to set out thy wretched obscurity! Provoke me, I desire thou wilt! One hundred guineas will I give thee, to say but thou