Plays by Anton Chekhov, Second Series

for my beliefs. The peasants don’t love me for nothing, I assure you. We’ve got to learn to know the peasants! We ought to learn how.... ANYA. You’re doing it again, uncle! VARYA. Be quiet, uncle! FIERS. [Angrily] Leonid Andreyevitch! GAEV. I’m coming, I’m coming.... Go to bed now. Off two cushions into the middle! I turn over a new leaf.... [Exit. FIERS goes out after him.] ANYA. I’m quieter now. I don’t want to go to Yaroslav, I don’t like grandmother; but I’m calm now; thanks to uncle. [Sits down.] VARYA. It’s time to go to sleep. I’ll go. There’s been an unpleasantness here while you were away. In the old servants’ part of the house, as you know, only the old people live--little old Efim and Polya and Evstigney, and Karp as well. They started letting some tramps or other spend the night there--I said nothing. Then I heard that they were saying that I had ordered them to be fed on peas and nothing else; from meanness, you see.... And it was all Evstigney’s doing.... Very well, I thought, if that’s what the matter is, just you wait. So I call Evstigney.... [Yawns] He comes. “What’s this,” I say, “Evstigney, you old fool.”... [Looks at ANYA] Anya dear! [Pause] She’s dropped off.... [Takes ANYA’S arm] Let’s go to bye-bye.... Come along!... [Leads her] My darling’s gone to sleep! Come on.... [They go. In the distance, the other side of the orchard, a shepherd plays his pipe. TROFIMOV crosses the stage and stops on seeing VARYA and ANYA] Sh! She’s asleep, asleep. Come on, dear. ANYA. [Quietly, half-asleep] I’m so tired... all the bells... uncle, dear! Mother and uncle! VARYA. Come on, dear, come on! [They go into ANYA’S room.] TROFIMOV. [Moved] My sun! My spring! Curtain. ACT TWO [In a field. An old, crooked shrine, which has been long abandoned; near it a well and large stones, which apparently are old tombstones, and an old garden seat. The road is seen to GAEV’S estate. On one side rise dark poplars, behind them begins the cherry orchard. In the distance is a row of telegraph poles, and far, far away on the horizon are the indistinct signs of a large town, which can only be seen on the finest and clearest days. It is close on sunset. CHARLOTTA, YASHA, and DUNYASHA are sitting on the seat; EPIKHODOV stands by and plays on a guitar; all seem thoughtful. CHARLOTTA wears a man’s old peaked cap; she has unslung a rifle from her shoulders and is putting to rights the buckle on the strap.] CHARLOTTA. [Thoughtfully] I haven’t a real passport. I don’t know how old I am, and I think I’m young. When I was a little girl my father and mother used to go round fairs and give very good performances and I used to do the _salto mortale_ and various little things. And when papa and mamma died a German lady took me to her and began to teach me. I liked it. I grew up and became a governess. And where I came from and who I am, I don’t know.... Who my parents were--perhaps they weren’t married--I don’t know. [Takes a cucumber out of her pocket and eats] I don’t know anything. [Pause] I do want to talk, but I haven’t anybody to talk to... I haven’t anybody at all. EPIKHODOV. [Plays on the guitar and sings] “What is this noisy earth to me, What matter friends and foes?” I do like playing on the mandoline! DUNYASHA. That’s a guitar, not a mandoline. [Looks at herself in a little mirror and powders herself.] EPIKHODOV. For the enamoured madman, this is a mandoline. [Sings] “Oh that the heart was warmed, By all the flames of love returned!” [YASHA sings too.] CHARLOTTA. These people sing terribly.... Foo! Like jackals. DUNYASHA. [To YASHA] Still, it must be nice to live abroad. YASHA. Yes, certainly. I cannot differ from you there. [Yawns and lights a cigar.] EPIKHODOV. That is perfectly natural. Abroad everything is in full complexity. YASHA. That goes without saying. EPIKHODOV. I’m an educated man, I read various remarkable books, but I cannot understand the direction I myself want to go--whether to live or to shoot myself, as it were. So, in case, I always carry a revolver about with me. Here it is. [Shows a revolver.] CHARLOTTA. I’ve done. Now I’ll go. [Slings the rifle] You, Epikhodov, are a very clever man and very terrible; women must be madly in love with you. Brrr! [Going] These wise ones are all so stupid. I’ve nobody to talk to. I’m always alone, alone; I’ve nobody at all... and I don’t know who I am or why I live. [Exit slowly.] EPIKHODOV. As a matter of fact, independently of everything else, I must express my feeling, among other things, that fate has been as pitiless in her dealings with me as a storm is to a small ship. Suppose, let us grant, I am wrong; then why did I wake up this morning, to give an example, and behold an enormous spider on my chest, like that. [Shows with both hands] And if I do drink some kvass, why is it that there is bound to be something of the most indelicate nature in it, such as a beetle? [Pause] Have you read Buckle? [Pause] I should like to trouble you, Avdotya Fedorovna, for two words. DUNYASHA. Say on. EPIKHODOV. I should prefer to be alone with you. [Sighs.] DUNYASHA. [Shy] Very well, only first bring me my little cloak.... It’s by the cupboard. It’s a little damp here. EPIKHODOV. Very well... I’ll bring it.... Now I know what to do with my revolver. [Takes guitar and exits, strumming.] YASHA. Two-and-twenty troubles! A silly man, between you and me and the gatepost. [Yawns.] DUNYASHA. I hope to goodness he won’t shoot himself. [Pause] I’m so nervous, I’m worried. I went into service when I was quite a little girl, and now I’m not used to common life, and my hands are white, white as a lady’s. I’m so tender and so delicate now; respectable and afraid of everything.... I’m so frightened. And I don’t know what will happen to my nerves if you deceive me, Yasha. YASHA. [Kisses her] Little cucumber! Of course, every girl must respect herself; there’s nothing I dislike more than a badly behaved girl. DUNYASHA. I’m awfully in love with you; you’re educated, you can talk about everything. [Pause.] YASHA. [Yawns] Yes. I think this: if a girl loves anybody, then that means she’s immoral. [Pause] It’s nice to smoke a cigar out in the open air.... [Listens] Somebody’s coming. It’s the mistress, and people with her. [DUNYASHA embraces him suddenly] Go to the house, as if you’d been bathing in the river; go by this path, or they’ll meet you and will think I’ve been meeting you. I can’t stand that sort of thing. DUNYASHA. [Coughs quietly] My head’s aching because of your cigar. [Exit. YASHA remains, sitting by the shrine. Enter LUBOV ANDREYEVNA, GAEV, and LOPAKHIN.] LOPAKHIN. You must make up your mind definitely--there’s no time to waste. The question is perfectly plain. Are you willing to let the land for villas or no? Just one word, yes or no? Just one word! LUBOV. Who’s smoking horrible cigars here? [Sits.] GAEV. They built that railway; that’s made this place very handy. [Sits] Went to town and had lunch... red in the middle! I’d like to go in now and have just one game. LUBOV. You’ll have time. LOPAKHIN. Just one word! [Imploringly] Give me an answer! GAEV. [Yawns] Really! LUBOV. [Looks in her purse] I had a lot of money yesterday, but there’s very little to-day. My poor Varya feeds everybody on milk soup to save money, in the kitchen the old people only get peas, and I spend recklessly. [Drops the purse, scattering gold coins] There, they are all over the place. YASHA. Permit me to pick them up. [Collects the coins.] LUBOV. Please do, Yasha. And why did I go and have lunch there?... A horrid restaurant with band and tablecloths smelling of soap.... Why do you drink so much, Leon? Why do you eat so much? Why do you talk so much? You talked again too much to-day in the restaurant, and it wasn’t at all to the point--about the seventies and about decadents. And to whom? Talking to the waiters about decadents! LOPAKHIN. Yes. GAEV. [Waves his hand] I can’t be cured, that’s obvious.... [Irritably to YASHA] What’s the matter? Why do you keep twisting about in front of me? YASHA. [Laughs] I can’t listen to your voice without laughing. GAEV. [To his sister] Either he or I... LUBOV. Go away, Yasha; get out of this.... YASHA. [Gives purse to LUBOV ANDREYEVNA] I’ll go at once. [Hardly able to keep from laughing] This minute.... [Exit.] LOPAKHIN. That rich man Deriganov is preparing to buy your estate. They say he’ll come to the sale himself. LUBOV. Where did you hear that? LOPAKHIN. They say so in town. GAEV. Our Yaroslav aunt has promised to send something, but I don’t know when or how much. LOPAKHIN. How much will she send? A hundred thousand roubles? Or two, perhaps? LUBOV. I’d be glad of ten or fifteen thousand. LOPAKHIN. You must excuse my saying so, but I’ve never met such frivolous people as you before, or anybody so unbusinesslike and peculiar. Here I am telling you in plain language that your estate will be sold, and you don’t seem to understand. LUBOV. What are we to do? Tell us, what? LOPAKHIN. I tell you every day. I say the same thing every day. Both the cherry orchard and the land must be leased off for villas and at once, immediately--the auction is staring you in the face: Understand! Once you do definitely make up your minds to the villas, then you’ll have as much money as you want and you’ll be saved. LUBOV. Villas and villa residents--it’s so vulgar, excuse me. GAEV. I entirely agree with you. LOPAKHIN. I must cry or yell or faint. I can’t stand it! You’re too much for me! [To GAEV] You old woman! GAEV. Really! LOPAKHIN. Old woman! [Going out.] LUBOV. [Frightened] No, don’t go away, do stop; be a dear. Please. Perhaps we’ll find some way out! LOPAKHIN. What’s the good of trying to think! LUBOV. Please don’t go away. It’s nicer when you’re here.... [Pause] I keep on waiting for something to happen, as if the house is going to collapse over our heads. GAEV. [Thinking deeply] Double in the corner... across the middle.... LUBOV. We have been too sinful.... LOPAKHIN. What sins have you committed? GAEV. [Puts candy into his mouth] They say that I’ve eaten all my substance in sugar-candies. [Laughs.] LUBOV. Oh, my sins.... I’ve always scattered money about without holding myself in, like a madwoman, and I married a man who made nothing but debts. My husband died of champagne--he drank terribly--and to my misfortune, I fell in love with another man and went off with him, and just at that time--it was my first punishment, a blow that hit me right on the head--here, in the river... my boy was drowned, and I went away, quite away, never to return, never to see this river again...I shut my eyes and ran without thinking, but _he_ ran after me... without pity, without respect. I bought a villa near Mentone because _he_ fell ill there, and for three years I knew no rest either by day or night; the sick man wore me out, and my soul dried up. And last year, when they had sold the villa to pay my debts, I went away to Paris, and there he robbed me of all I had and threw me over and went off with another woman. I tried to poison myself.... It was so silly, so shameful.... And suddenly I longed to be back in Russia, my own land, with my little girl.... [Wipes her tears] Lord, Lord be merciful to me, forgive me my sins! Punish me no more! [Takes a telegram out of her pocket] I had this to-day from Paris.... He begs my forgiveness, he implores me to return.... [Tears it up] Don’t I hear music? [Listens.] GAEV. That is our celebrated Jewish band. You remember--four violins, a flute, and a double-bass. LUBOV So it still exists? It would be nice if they came along some evening.