Real Life In London, Volumes I. and II.
good fortune, told him, that several friends had very much admired the
plate, and even expressed an intention of ordering similar services; and
that with regard to the borrowed plate, he had taken so strong a fancy
to it, as to feel disposed to become a purchaser, if the price was
reasonable, and an adequate consideration was made for prompt payment.
“The silversmith, who chuckled inwardly at the prospect of extending
his business, and connecting himself with so many 'honourable men,'
gratefully expressed his acknowledgments, and assuring him of liberal
dealing, the several items of the borrowed plate were examined and
dilated upon, the price of each article, after much higgling, was
ultimately fixed, the sum total ascertained, and an early clay appointed
for a final settlement of the accompt. It never was the intention of the
borrower to return the plate, but he now had achieved a great object,
by entirely changing the whole complexion of the business; he had now
converted fraud into debt, and happen what might, the silversmith could
only sue him on a civil process, which against a limb of the law, and
as such, privileged from arrest, must be tedious and uncertain, whereas,
had he made away with the plate, without accomplishing the object of
this last manouvre, (such is the indiscriminating severity of English
law,) that he might have been amenable to the punishment of felony!
“Now comes the reckoning when the banquet's o'er! the parties met
for final settlement, when behold! the accepted purchaser offers the
silversmith a bill at a month; he refuses it indignantly, and consults
his solicitor as to the possibility of compelling the restoration of the
plate; but the lawyer told him, that on his own shewing this could not
be done. The silversmith had now no other resource than that of taking
the ~188~~ proposed bill, and waiting the expiration of the month, for
payment. In the meanwhile, the debtor exhibiting the talent of an able
conveyancer, transmuted the silver into gold, and now laughs at the
credulity of London tradesmen, and sets the silversmith at defiance!”{1}
1 This incident, as related by Dash all, actually and very
recently occurred.
An interesting and useful volume might be compiled on the
subject of frauds practised on London tradesmen. Many of
these tricks have been highly characteristic of ingenuity.
The following is a ludicrous instance of female stratagem.
We give the article literally, as it occurred.
A few days ago, a female, apparently a person of rank,
visited in her carriage, towards the evening, a Silk
Mercer's Shop, westward of Temple Bar, where she made
choice, for purchase, of silks and other rich articles of
feminine dress and decoration, to the value of above fifty
pounds. Her manner was that of a perfectly well-bred
gentlewoman, and her person displayed no small portion of
attractive and elegant accomplishment. Having completed
her selection, she expressed much regret that she could not
pay the amount of the bill on the instant: “But,” she
continued, “it is a delightful evening; my house is in the
suburbs of town; a short and easy ride will prove a pleasant
recreation, and if you will accompany me home in my
carriage, you shall, on our arrival, be immediately paid.”
The mercer was more gallant of spirit than to reject the
courtesy of a lady so fair and fascinating, and accepting
with pleasure the proferred honour, the vehicle soon
reached its destination. The lady first alighted, taking
with her, into an elegant mansion, the articles of
purchase; the mercer presently followed, was shewn into a
handsome drawing-room, and received with much politeness, by
apparently by a gentleman of the faculty.--A silence of a
few minutes ensued, when the mercer inquired for the lady,
observing, at the same time, that it was necessary he should
return to town immediately. The courteous physician
recommended silence, and the mercer became irritated and
clamorous for his money and freedom of exit. Two
attendants making their appearance, they were directed to
conduct the patient to his apartment. The mercer
suspecting that he was the dupe of artifice, grasped a
poker, with the intention of effect-ing, at all hazard, his
liberation from “durance vile,” but his efforts had no other
result than that of confirming his trammels, and he was
presently bound over to keep the peace, under the guarantee
of a straight-waistcoat! The unfortunate mercer now told a
“plain unvarnished tale,” which gained the attention of the
humane physician, who was no other than the proprietor of
the mansion, in which he managed its concerns as an Asylum
for Lunatics. The lady who accompanied the mercer to the
house, had been with the physician the preceding day, and
made arrangements with him for the reception of an insane
patient.--It was now discovered that she had come under a
fictitious name; had retreated in the hired vehicle with the
mercer's property; and had adopted this curious stratagem,
the more effectually to silence suspicion and prevent
detection.
~189~~ This detail threw the Squire into a train of rumination, on the
tricks and chicanery of metropolitan adventurers; while Dashall amused
himself with the breakfast-table concomitant, the newspaper. A few
minutes only elapsed, when he laid it aside, approached the window,
and seeing a funeral pass, in procession, along the street, he turned
towards his Cousin, and interrupted his reverie with the following
extemporaneous address:--
“Dost thou observe,” he said, “yon sable tribe
Of death anticipates?--These are they
Who, when men die, rejoice! all others else
Of human kind, shed o'er departed friends
The tear of reminiscence; these prowlers
Hunt after Death, and fatten on his prey!
Mark now their measur'd steps, solemn and slow,
And visage of each doleful form, that wears
The semblance of distress; they mourn for hire,
And tend the funeral rites with hearts of stone!
Their souls of apathy would never feel
A moment's pang were Death at one fell sweep,
Even all their relatives to hurl from earth!--
Knaves there exist among them who defraud
The grave for sordid lucre; who will take
The contract price for hurrying to the tomb
The culprit corse the victim of the law,
But lay it where? Think'st thou in sacred ground!
No! in the human butcher's charnel-house!
Who pleas'd, reserves the felon for the knife,
And bribes the greater villain with a fee!”
Cousin Bob was very much surprised by this sudden effusion, and
inquiring the source of inspiration, Dashall put into his hands the
newspaper, pointing to the following extraordinary communication,
extracted verbatim.{1}
1 The King v. Cundick.--This was an indictment against the
defendant, undertaker to the Horsemonger-lane gaol, for a
mis-demeanour, in corruptly selling for dissection the body
of a capital convict, after he had been executed, contrary
to his duty, in viola-tion of public decency, and the
scandal of religion. There were various counts in the
indictment, charging the offence in different ways. The
defendant pleaded Not Guilty.
The case excited considerable interest, as well for its
unprecedented novelty as the singularity of its
circumstances. It was a public prosecution at the instance
of the Magistracy of the County.
Mr. Nolan and Mr. Bolland conducted the case for the Crown;
and Mr. Adolphus, Mr. Turton, and Mr. Ryland, were for
the defence.
It appeared in evidence that a capital convict, named Edward
Lee, who had been tried and found guilty at the last
Croydon Assizes, of a highway robbery, was publicly executed
at Horse-monger-lane gaol, on Monday, the 10th of September.
After he was cut down he was delivered over to the
defendant, the appointed carpenter and undertaker of the
gaol, for interment at the County's expense, for which he
was allowed three guineas. He received particular
directions that the afflicted mother and other friends of
the deceased were to be permitted to see the body before
inter-ment, and follow it to the grave, if they thought
proper. The friends of the deceased called on the
defendant, who lives in Redcross-street, to know when the
funeral would take place. He appointed the following day,
Tuesday, the 11th of September. The unhappy mother of the
deceased, being confined to her bed, was unable to attend
the funeral, but sent a friend to the house of the defendant
to see the body, and cut a lock of its hair. Application
being made to the defendant for this purpose, he said he had
already buried the body, because he could not keep such
people any longer in his house. The friend demanded a
certificate of the funeral, which he promised to procure on
a subsequent day, upon paying a fee. On the Thursday
following the uncle of the deceased called for a certificate
of the burial, but could not get it, the de-fendant then
saying that the body had been buried the day before. The
friends then became clamorous, and complaint being made to
Mr. Walter, the gaoler, he sent repeatedly for the defendant
to come to the gaol and explain his conduct, which he
declined. At length one of the turnkeys was sent after
him on the Friday, with positive directions to bring him
forthwith. As soon as the de-fendant found that he was
compelled to go to Mr. Walter, he made an excuse, that he
had some immediate business to attend to, but would meet the
messenger in an hour at a neighbouring public-house. To
this the turnkey consented, but watched the defendant to his
house, where he saw two or three suspicious looking men
lurking about. After waiting for some time, the defendant
came to him, and expressed his surprise that he was not gone
to the public-house. The defendant appeared agitated, and
went off as hard as he could towards the Southwark Iron
Bridge. A person named Crisp, who was with the turnkey,
went one way after the defendant, and the turnkey another.
The latter went to Crawford's burial ground, where he saw
the same suspicious looking man whom he had observed about
the defendant's house, in the act of interring a coffin.
He immediately interposed, and said the coffin should not be
buried until he examined its contents. At this moment
the defendant came into the burying-ground, and
seemed angry at the interruption, and begged he
might be allowed to inter the body, which he acknowledged
was Edward Lee; and excused himself for not burying it
before, by saying, that the pressure of other business
prevented him. The turnkey remonstrated with him for
disobedience of the orders he had received to permit the
friends of the deceased to see the body and attend the
funeral. The defendant seemed greatly perplexed: at length
he took hold of Crisp and the turnkey by the sleeve, and,
with considerable agitation, offered them 10L. each to
permit him to bury the coffin, and say no more about the