Real Life In London, Volumes I. and II.
one being at present used as an observatory. Neither the sides of this
building, nor the small towers, are uniform. The walls are whitewashed:
near to it is the grand storehouse, a plain building of brick and stone,
345 feet long, and 60 feet broad.
Being conducted to the Spanish{1} armory, Tallyho was much gratified
with a view of its contents--trophies of the famous victory of Queen
Elizabeth over the Spanish armada, among which the most remarkable were
the thumb screws, intended to be used in order to extort confession
from the English, where their money was hidden. The axe with which
the unfortunate Anne Bullen was beheaded by order of Henry VIII.;
a representation of Queen Elizabeth in armour, standing by a
cream-coloured horse, attended by a page, also attracted his attention;
her majesty being dressed in the armour she wore at the time she
addressed her brave army at Tilbury, in 1588, with a white silk
petticoat, richly ornamented with pearls and spangles. In the Small
Armory, which is one of the finest rooms in Europe, containing complete
stands of arms for 100,000 men, they could not but admire the beautiful
and elegant manner in which the arms were disposed, forming tasteful
devices in a variety of figures: a piece of ordnance from Egypt, and the
Highland broadsword, also claimed particular notice.
1 The Spanish Armory, Small Armory, Train of Artillery, and
Horse Armory, may be seen at the price of 2s. each person,
with a compliment per company to the Warder.
The Volunteer Armory, containing arms piled in beautiful order for
30,000 men, with pikes, swords, &c. in immense numbers, presented
to them a fine figure of Charles Brandon, Duke of Suffolk, in bright
armour, bearing the very lance he actually used in his lifetime, which
is no less than 18 feet long. The Sea Armory, containing arms for nearly
50,000 seamen and marines, and the Royal Artillery, which is partly kept
on the ground floor under the Small Armory, next underwent inspection.
Here they could not help admiring the room, which is 380 feet long,
50 feet wide, and 24 feet high, and the many peculiarly fine pieces of
cannon which it contained. The artillery is ranged on each side, leaving
a passage in the centre of ten feet in breadth. Twenty pillars in
this room support the Small Armory above, which are hung round with
implements of war, and trophies taken from the enemy, producing
altogether a grand and imposing effect.
~~293~~~ The Horse Armory--a noble room, crowded with
curiosities--proved a source of high gratification. Here they found
themselves in company with all the kings of England, from William the
Conqueror to George III.; the whole on horseback, and in armour. The
armour of John of Gaunt, Duke of Lancaster, seven feet high, and the
sword and lance of proportionable size, were viewed as objects of
wonder.
In the Jewel Office,{1} containing the regalia of state, was the next
object to which they directed their attention. Here they were shewn the
Imperial Crown, with which the Kings of England are crowned: it is
made of gold, enriched with diamonds, emeralds, rubies, sapphires,
and pearls. The cap is of purple velvet, lined with white taffety, and
turned up with three rows of ermine. This crown is never used but at
coronations; the golden globe, which is placed in the King's right hand
before he is crowned; the golden sceptre and its cross, upon a
large amethyst, decorated with table diamonds; the sceptre, which is
considered to be far the most ancient in the collection, and probably a
part of the original regalia, is covered with jewels and gothic enamel
work, surmounted with an onyx dove, was found by the present keeper
in the year 1814, and is estimated at a very high value. St. Edward's
staff, made of beaten gold, and which is borne before the King in the
coronation procession, is 4 feet 7 inches and a half in length, and 3
inches and 3 quarters round. The golden saltseller, the sword of mercy
without a point, the grand silver font, used for christenings of the
royal family, and the crown of state worn by the King at his meeting
of the Parliament, and other state occasions, were viewed in succession
with admiration and delight. The latter is of great splendour and value;
it is covered with precious stones of a large size, and on the top of
its cross is a pearl, which Charles I. pledged for eighteen thousand
pounds to the Dutch Republic: under the cross is an emerald diamond,
of a palish green colour, valued at one hundred thousand pounds, being
seven inches and
1 The Jewel Office is shewn for 1s. each person in company;
a single person pays 1s. 6d.: it may be seen separately, but
not without a Warder.
a half in circumference; in the front is a rock ruby in its purely
natural state, unpolished, three inches in length, the value of which
cannot be estimated. Several other curiosities of state regalia--such as
the golden eagle, the golden spur, the crown of Queen Mary, the cross
of King William, and the diadem worn by the Queens Anne and Mary, were
numbered among the valuable jewels contained in this office, together
with abundance of curious old plate, the value of which, independent
of several of the jewels, which are inestimable, is not less than two
millions sterling.
~~294~~~ “Now,” said Dashall, as they left the Jewel Office, “we have
taken a view of the inanimates, we must not leave the spot without
a peep at the lions;{l} for though I believe there is nothing very
extraordinary in the collection, more than may be seen at the menagerie
at Exeter Change, it would be an unpardonable omission not to see the
lions in the Tower.”
1 The wild beasts, &c. are shewn at 1s. each.
For this purpose they proceeded to the western entrance, where they were
quickly introduced by the keeper to the various animals under his care,
and who, in going round with them, explained, as usual, their several
histories.
In examining these various curiosities, time had imperceptibly stolen a
march upon them, and their original plan of proceeding to Greenwich was
found to be impracticable; besides which, upon reaching the stairs where
they had landed, the bluff old waterman was not to be found.
“Zounds,” said Dashall, “this looks like a do. I wonder what's become of
the old blade.”
Sparkle began to laugh, and Bob bit his lip. Tom made inquiry of a boy
at the stairs, who informed him that Barney was gone to the suttling
house to smoak a pipe.
“All right,” said Tom, “then we will soon rouse him, and start.”
Upon this they moved back again into the Tower, and according to the
directions they had received, they found Barney in the tap-room,
puffing away care, and singing with Stentorian voice to the surrounding
company--
“From Irongate to Limehouse Hole,
You will not meet a kinder soul,
While the Thames is flowing,
Pull away ho--Pull away ho.”
~~295~~~ In search of real life and character, and at all times rather
inclined to promote mirth than spoil sport, our friends immediately
entered unperceived by Barney, and taking an opposite corner of the
room, were quickly attended by the landlord, who received orders, and
produced them supplies.
The song being over, and Barney rewarded for his exertions by the most
enthusiastic applause of the room, he renewed his pipe, at the same
time declaring to a soldier who sat near him, he thought “he had miss'd
fire, for he was d------d if he didn't think he'd lost his company,
or his company had lost him--but that he had taken care to nibble the
blunt, and upon that there score all was right--so landlord tip us
another quart, and if they don't make their appearance by the time
I've got through that, I'll tip them the toddle, shove off my boat, and
disappear.--That's the time of day, an't it, boy.”
“Why aye, to be sure,” replied the soldier, “you watermen leads a happy
life; you are your own masters, you does just as you pleases, while a
soldier dare as well be d------d as desert his post. But I say, Barney,
mind what
you says,--nose--nose;” accompanying the last two words with a
significant action of placing his finger on his nose, and winking his
eye.
Upon this intimation, which appeared to be well understood by Barney,
he puffed off an immoderate cloud of smoke, and looking round the room,
perceived his customers in the corner.
“Be quiet,” said he, “that's my fare--so it's all right again,--Do you
want me, gentlemen; I am always ready, so that whenever you says the
word, Barney's your boy.”
“Presently,” said Dashall, “for it would be hard to make you start upon
a full jorum.”
“Why I must say,” continued Barney, “I never likes to leave a foaming
quart behind me;” and catching hold of the pot of _heavy wet_, he roared
out,--
“What a hearty blade am I,
Care can never touch my heart;
Every trouble I defy,
While I view the foaming quart.”
and taking a hearty drink, he handed it to his companion, filled
his pipe afresh, lighted, and informed the gentlemen he was at their
service; when in a few minutes all being ready, they were quickly on
board.
~~296~~~ “I don't like the looks of the weather, my masters, why we
shall have a shower presently, where will you go to?”
“To Vauxhall,” was the reply.
“Very well, your Honour, then here goes; but if you don't get a sousing,
my name an't Barney.”
This prognostication proved true, for before they reached Blackfriars
Bridge, a smart shower came on, which nearly wetted them through before
they could reach land. When this was accomplished, they proceeded to the
Horn Tavern, Doctors Commons, where they partook of an excellent repast,
and the weather clearing up, they again joined Barney.
By this time the promising fineness of the evening had induced many
to venture forth to the rowing match, and the river was all gaiety and
delight. Boats of every description were seen filled with well dressed
persons, both male and female: the smiling countenances of the lads and
lasses were in unison with the laughing sun, that darted his brilliant
beams upon the dimpled wave, which seemed to leap in return with
grateful animation. The shores were lined with spectators, anxiously
waiting the moment for the commencement of this trial of skill. Our
friends were highly delighted with the prospect before them, and at the
appointed time, having rested on their oars near the place of starting,
they saw with pleasure the active preparations on the part of the
competitors, and upon the signal being given for the start, the river
appeared to consist of nothing but moving conveyances of happy faces,
all guided in one direction. The 'shouts of the various friends of the
occasionally successful candidates for the honour of victory, and the
skill and dexterity with which they manoeuvred against each other, were
subjects of continued admiration; while bands of music were heard from
boats that intermingled with the throng. The lads of the Funny Club were
in high glee--numerous cutters and sailing boats, with their owners and
visiting friends, were also in the throng. Barney pulled away like
a good one, and for a considerable distance kept nearly up with the
principal actors in this gay and animated scene of aquatic diversion,
and arrived off Cumberland gardens just in time to have an excellent
view of the winner coming in at the appointed spot, in prime style,
amidst the loud and reiterated plaudits of his friends.
~~297~~~ The intention of visiting Vauxhall Gardens was, however, for
the present evening relinquished; and our party, feeling fatigued by
their excursion, repaired homeward, where for the present we shall leave
them to their quiet and repose.
CHAPTER XXII
“I hate that drum's discordant sound,