Real Life In London, Volumes I. and II.
contains; and the produce of the admission tickets, which has probably
netted twenty thousand pounds, goes to the liquidation of the debts.”
~~419~~~ “And an excellent plan for raising the wind too,” said Tallyho;
“the example, I suppose, has been taken from Wanstead House.”
“Most likely,” was the reply; “but if it is true that the disposal of
the property is occasioned by the embarrassment of its owner, it cannot
but excite painful and melancholy reflections on the tenure by which
men hold the goods of this life. Those who were acquainted with Mr.
Beckford's circumstances some years ago, thought him so secured in the
enjoyment of a princely income, that he was absolutely out of the reach
of ill fortune, being at one time in the actual receipt of one hundred
thousand pounds a year. It cannot be said of him that he has wasted his
inheritance at the gaming-table. The palace which he raised on a barren
mountain, the greater part of those vast plantations which surround it,
the collection of books, and of rare specimens of art, and the superb
furniture, which gives such peculiar dignity and splendour to the
interior of his residence, speak at once the immensity of his means, and
attest the propriety and gracefulness of their application.”
“We ought to have taken a trip there to have seen this earthly
paradise,” rejoined Tallyho; “but now I suppose it is all over.”
“Certainly,” was the reply; “and it is a circumstance for which the
people in the neighbourhood appear to have been totally unprepared. They
were led to believe, from the beginning, that the mere luxuries of
the place were to be sold, and the public announcement of this had the
effect of filling the county of Wilts with pleasure-hunters from all
quarters. He was fortunate who, for some time past, could find a
vacant chair within twenty miles of Fonthill: the solitude of a private
apartment was a luxury which few could hope for; and an old friend
of mine informs me, in one of his letters, that, coming from London,
travellers first met their troubles about Salisbury, The languages of
France, of Holland, and of Germany, the peculiarities (in tongue) of
Scotland and Ireland, the broad dialect of Somersetshire, the tinckling
accent of Wales, and the more polished tones of metropolitan residents,
were all, at the same moment, to be heard clashing and contending. There
were bells ringing, and chamber-maids screaming--horses prancing, and
post-boys swearing--wheels clattering, and waiters jostling--guests
threatening, and hubbub and confusion the orders of the day:--and all
this to see something which half of them, when they got there, if they
were so fortunate, could not obtain a sight of. So that, perhaps, we
have been quite as well off in remaining at home.”
~~420~~~ “That was spoken like a philosopher,” said Sparkle,
dryly.--“But pray, who is to be the future possessor of this fine
estate?”
“A Mr. Farquhar, who, according to the best information I have obtained,
is a man of an extraordinary character, and has given 330,000L. for it
as it stands, with every article in the Abbey except the family plate
and pictures, and a few very favourite rarities. Some interesting
particulars of the purchaser have recently been made known; from which
it appears, that he is a native of Aberdeen, and went out early in life
to India, where he was employed in the medical department. Chemical
research was his favourite pursuit: there was some defect in the manner
of manufacturing gunpowder, and Mr. Farquhar was selected to give his
assistance. By degrees, he obtained the management of the concern, and
finally he became the sole contractor to the government. In this way
wealth and distinction rapidly poured in upon him. After some years of
labour, he returned to England with half a million of money; and it is
somewhat curious that a man possessed of so much money upon his arrival
at Gravesend, should, merely to save the expense of coach-hire, walk up
to London; which, however, it appears he did, when his first visit,
very naturally, was to his banker. Without waiting for refreshment or
alteration of attire, full of dust and dirt, with clothes not worth a
guinea, he presented himself at the counter, and asked for Mr. Coutts.
The clerks, not much prepossessed in his favour by his appearance,
disregarded his application; and he was suffered to remain in the
cash-office under the idea of his being some poor petitioner, until Mr.
Coutts, passing through it, recognized his Indian customer, the man whom
he expected to see with all the pomp of a nabob. Mr. Farquhar requested
to have five pounds; which having received, he took his departure. This
anecdote strongly marks the character and habits of the man. He soon
afterwards settled in Upper Baker-street, where his house was to be
distinguished by its dingy appearance, uncleaned windows, and general
neglect. An old woman was his sole attendant; and his apartment, to
which a brush or broom was never applied, was kept sacred from her care.
His neighbours were not acquainted with his character; and there have
been instances of some of them offering him money as an object of
charity.”
~~421~~~ “An admirable tenant for such a place as Fonthill, truly,”
observed Sparkle.--“Why, what the devil will he do with it now he has
got it?”
“Perhaps,” said Dashall, “I ought to refer you to the man himself for
an answer to such a question, for I am at a loss to guess; he is now
sixty-five years of age, and still in single blessedness.”
“A very enviable situation,” remarked Sparkle, “However,” continued Tom,
“he has done some good in the world, and may live to do more. He became
a partner in the great agency house in the City, of Basset, Farquhar,
and Co.; besides which, he purchased the late Mr. Whitbread's share in
the brewery. Part of his great wealth was devoted to the purchase of
estates; but the great bulk was invested in stock, and suffered to
increase on compound interest. He is deeply read in ancient and modern
literature, and has a mind of extraordinary vigour and originality;
his conversation of a superior order, impressive and animated on every
subject. His sentiments are liberal, and strangely contrasted with his
habits. His religious opinions are peculiar, and seem to be influenced
by an admiration of the purity of the lives and moral principles of the
Brahmins. It is said that he offered 100,000L. to found a college in
Aberdeen, with a reservation on points of religion; to which, however,
the sanction of the legislature could not be procured, and the plan
was dropped. He has been residing in Gloucester-place, where he
has furnished a house in a style of modern elegance, and, so far
as appearances are concerned, indulges in several luxuries; but his
domestic habits are still the same, and his table seldom labours with
the pressure of heavy dishes. He has one nephew, to whom he allows, or
did allow, 300L. per year; has but few other claims of family; and it
is probable that his immense wealth will be bequeathed to charitable
purposes, as the great object of his ambition is to leave his name to
posterity as the founder of some public institution. To that passion
may, perhaps, be attributed the purchase of Fonthill Abbey; for his age
and infirmities totally unfit him for the enjoyment of such ~~422~~~
a place. He is diminutive in person, and by no means prepossessing in
appearance; his dress has all the qualities of the antique to recommend
it; and his domestic expenditure, until the last year, has not exceeded
200L. per annum, although his possessions, money in the funds, and
capital in trade, are said to amount to a million and a half!”
“Why, he is an oddity indeed,” exclaimed Tallyho, “and I think he ought
to be exhibited as the eighth wonder of the world.”
“Certainly we cannot look upon the like every day: there are instances,
it is said, of his having returned letters merely because the postage
was not paid, although he has, on more than one or two occasions, given
away, at once, for praise-worthy purposes, ten and twenty thousand
pounds.”
“Then,” rejoined Sparkle, “he is a trump, and deserves to be
respected:--but where are we bound to?”
“Nay,” replied Tom, “I have no choice upon the subject.”
“Nor I neither,” said Gayfield, stepping smartly up to him, and catching
him by the hand--“so come along--I'll guide you to good quarters and
comfortable accommodation.--Dine with me, and we will have a cut in at
whist.--What say you?”
This proposition was acceded to, and away they went to Gayfield's
apartments, where a very hospitable and friendly entertainment was
presented to them with every mark of a hearty welcome. In the evening,
the glass circulated freely, and cards being introduced, they enjoyed an
agreeable and pleasant game, at which nothing particular occurred; after
which they jumped into a rattler, and were conveyed home, very well
satisfied with every attention they had received from Gayfield, except
the eternal rattle of his tongue.
CHAPTER XXXIII
“The proper study of mankind in food.”
~~423~~~
Next morning, while our party were at breakfast, who should make his
appearance but Gayfield, whose elasticity of spirits, and volubility of
tongue, appeared, if possible, to have acquired an additional impulse of
action.
“My dear fellow,” he commenced, addressing Bob, “as you are so soon
about to leave us, I feel anxious you should carry with you all the
information possible on that interesting subject, Life in London. Long
as your stay in the Metropolis has been, still, where the subjects
are so varying--so ever varying--so multifarious--and the field for
observation so unlimited, it is impossible but that something must have
escaped your notice.
“I have been scribbling to a friend in the country, whom I occasionally
endeavour to amuse with “Sketches of Scenes in London;” and, as I
flatter myself, it exhibits something of novelty both in character,
situation, and incident, you shall hear it.”
“Dear Dick--I told you that I was about to have the honour of being
introduced to tin; celebrated Dr. Kitchen. 'He was a man, take him for
all in all, I ne'er shall look upon his like again.' It was evidently
one of 'Nature's worst journeymen' that made him; for he has not a limb
which appears to appertain to his body; they look precisely as if they
were purchased at an auction. This little man, who seems born to be
'girded at' by jokers of all classes, sharing the prevalent rage for
notoriety, has written two works, one in the character of a _gourmand_,
and the other of a musician. But not content with the fame he has thus
acquired, he has persuaded himself that he is an excellent singer. Nay,
it was given out lately, by his own concurrence, that he intended to
sing at a concert at the Argyle Rooms; and although he has no more voice
than a ~~424~~~ cat, he was under the full impression that his Majesty,
at the conclusion of the last court-day, intended to call upon him for
a song. The Doctor asked me and Caustic to one of his literary dinners;
and as T have supplied you with a sketch of a cook-shop _gourmand_, I
make no apology for shewing up a more elevated class of _gastronomes_,
by reporting the Doctor's speech on this occasion.--
“'On entering the world, the acuteness of my palate and vigour of
digestion disposed me to conceive that I should excel in the fraternal
sciences of eating and drinking; and I entertained no doubt but my vapid
organs would be considerably improved by frequent exercise. Taste
has various departments--painting, architecture, sculpture, &c.; but
impressed with the conviction that my only office in this world was to
invent new dishes and devour them, I collected all the culinary writers