Real Life In London, Volumes I. and II.
fortune exceeding 200,000L.! But what may not be achieved by a man who
despised no gains, however small, and in his own expressive language,
considered farthings as “the seeds of guineas!”
The following appears to be a true description of this very
extraordinary man, whom we ourselves have seen more than once:--“Old
Courtois was well known for more than half a century in the purlieus of
St. Martin's and the Haymarket. His appearance was meagre and squalid,
and his clothes, such as they were, were ~320~~ pertinaciously got up in
exactly the same cut and fashion, and the colour always either fawn or
marone. For the last thirty years, the venerable chapeau was uniformly
of the same cock. The principal feat, however, in which this fervent
votary of Plutus appeared before the public, was his nearly fatal affair
with Mary Benson, otherwise Mrs. Maria Theresa Phepoe. In April 1795,
this ill-fated-woman projected a rather bungling scheme, in order
to frighten her old acquaintance and visitor, Courtois, out of a
considerable sum of money. One evening, when she was certain of his
calling, she had her apartment prepared for his reception in a species
of funereal style--a bier, a black velvet pall, black wax candles
lighted, &c. No sooner had the friend entered the room, than the lady,
assisted by her maid, pounced on him, forced him into an arm chair,
in which he was forcibly held down by the woman, while the hostess,
brandishing a case-knife or razor, swore with some violent imprecations,
that instant should be his last, if he did not give her an order on his
“banker for a large sum of money. The venerable visitor, alarmed at the
gloomy preparations and dire threats of the desperate female, asked for
pen, ink, and paper; which being immediately produced, he wrote a check
on his banker for two thousand pounds. He immediately retired with
precipitation, happy to escape without personal injury. The next
morning, before its opening, he attended at the Banker's, with some
Police-officers; and on Mrs. Phepoe's making her appearance with the
check, she was arrested, and subsequently tried at the Old Bailey, on a
capital charge, grounded on the above proceedings. However, through
the able defence made by her counsel (the late Mr. Fielding) who took a
legal objection to the case as proved, and contended that she never
had or obtained any property of Mr. Courtois, on the principle that
possession constituted the first badge of ownership, she was only
sentenced to twelve months' imprisonment.”
“Some years since, the late Lord Gage met Courtois, at the court-room of
the East India House, on an election business. “Ah, Courtois!” said his
Lordship, “what brings you here?”--'To give my votes, my Lord,' was the
answer.--“What! are you a proprietor?--'Most certainly.'--“And of more
votes than one?”--'Yes, my ~321~~ Lord, I have four!'--“Aye, indeed! why
then, before you take the book, pray be kind enough to pin up my curls!”
With which modest request the proprietor of four votes, equal to ten
thousand pounds, immediately complied!
“M. Courtois married a few years since, and has left several children.
On reflecting that his widow's thirds would amount to an immense sum,
with his usual prudence he made a handsome settlement on her during
his lifetime. As his sons were not of very economical habits, he has
bequeathed them small annuities only; and vested the bulk of his fortune
in trustees on behalf of his daughters, who are infants.
“Until his death, he invariably adhered to the costume of the age in
which he was born. A three-cocked hat, and a plum-coloured coat,
both rather the worse for wear, in which we have seen him frequently,
invariably designated his person and habits; while a penurious economy,
that bid defiance to all vulgar imitation, accompanied him to his grave.
His death occurred in 1819, in the 80th or 81st year of his age.”
“Such characters,” observed Tallyho, “notwithstanding their
eccentricity, afford useful lessons to those who, in this giddy and
dissipated age, devote a part of their time to thinking.”
“No doubt of it,” replied Dashall; “they furnish examples of what may
be done by perseverance and determination, and almost seem to verify the
assertion, that every one may become rich if he pleases. But come, we
must move towards Tom's Coffee House, in our way to which we will
pass through the Royal Exchange, which lies directly before us. It was
originally a brick building, erected by Sir Thomas Gresham in the year
1567, but being destroyed by the fire of London in 1666, the present
building of Portland stone was raised in its place, the first stone
of which was laid by Charles II. in 1667; in consequence of which his
statue has been placed in the centre of its quadrangle, around which the
Merchants assemble daily to transact their commercial business.{1}
1 The merry Monarch was fond of the Citizens, and frequently
honoured the Lord Mayor's table with his presence. It is
said of him, that, on retiring to his carriage one day after
dining with the civic Sovereign, he was followed by the
latter, who, with a freedom inspired by the roseate Deity,
laid hold of His Majesty by the arm, and insisted that he
should not go until he had drunk t'other bottle. The Monarch
turned round, and good-humouredly repeating a line from an
old song--“The man that is drunk is as great as a king,”
went back to the company, and doubtless complied with the
Lord Mayor's request.
~322~~ “It has two principal fronts, one in Cornhill, and the other,
which you now see, is at the end of Threadneedle Street; each of which
has a piazza, affording a convenient shelter from the sun and rain.
It is open as a thoroughfare from eight in the morning till six in the
evening; but the hours in which business is chiefly transacted, are from
two to five. Its extent is 203 feet by 171.”
By this time they had passed the gate, and Bob found himself in a
handsome area with a fine piazza carried entirely round, and furnished
with seats along the four walks, for Merchants of different nations, who
meet, each at their different stations, and was immediately attracted
by the appearance of the numerous specimens of art with which it was
adorned.
“Do you observe,” said his Cousin, “within these piazzas are
twenty-eight niches; all vacant but that in which is placed a statue of
Sir Thomas Gresham, in the north-west angle; and that in the south-west,
which presents a statue of Sir John Barnard, Magistrate of the City, and
one of its Representatives in Parliament. Those smaller statues in the
niches of the wall of the Quadrangle, in the upper story, are the Kings
and Queens of England, beginning with Edward I. on the North side, and
ending with his late Majesty on the East. As far as Charles I. they were
executed by Gabriel Cibber. The various frames which are placed around
under the piazza, contain the names, residences and occupations of
Tradesmen, Mechanics and others. The grand front in Cornhill has
been under repair lately, and in its appearance, no doubt, is greatly
improved. The steeple which is just raised, is a handsome dome,
surmounted by the original grasshopper, rendered somewhat celebrated by
a prophecy, that certain alterations would take place in men, manners,
and times, when the grasshopper on the top of the Exchange should meet
the dragon at the top of Bow Church; and strange and extraordinary as it
may appear, this very circumstance is said to have taken place, as
they have both been seen in the warehouse of some manufacturer, to
whom ~323~~ they were consigned for repair; in addition to which, if
Crockery's{1} relation of the transmogrifications of England is to
be believed, the prophecy is in a considerable degree a whimsical and
laughable Burletta, in one act, has recently been produced at the Royal
Coburg Theatre, in which Mr. Sloman sings, with admirable comicality,
the following Song, alluded to by the Hon. Tom Dashall, to the tune of
O, The Roast Beef of Old England.
“From Hingy I came with my Master, O dear,
But Lunnun is not like the same place, that's clear;
It has nigh broke my heart since I have been here!
O, the old times of Old England,
O dear, the good English old times.
The town is so changed, that I don't know a spot;
The times are so hard, there's no vork to be got;
And for porter they charges you tip-pence a pot!
O, the old times, &c.
Then the sides of the houses are stuck full of bills
About Blacking, Mock-Auctions, and vonderful Fills;
But for von vot they cures, a hundred they kills!
O, the old times, &c.
There's the names are all halter'd verewer I goes,
And the people all laughs at the cut of my close;
The men are turn'd vomen, the belles are turn'd beaux!
O, the old times, &c.
Ven I vent out to Hingy, if any von died,
A good vooden coffin they used to prowide,
But hiron vons now keeps the poor vorms houtside!
O, the old times, &c.
There's the Lancaster schools now all over the land,
Vot teaches the children to scribble on sand--
And a hugly Bonassus vot lives in the Strand!
O, the new times, &c.
There's a new Life-preserver, vith vich you cant drown;
And a new kind of Sov'reigns just com'd into town,
Von is vorth a pound note, and the other a crown!
O, the new times, &c.
The Play-bills have hard vords, vot I cannot speak;
And the horgans plays nothing but Latin and Greek;
And it's rain'd every day now for more than a veek!
O, the new times, &c.
There's a man valks on vater and don't vet his feet;
And a patent steam-kitchen, vot cooks all your meat;
And Epp's ham and beef shop in every street!
O, the new times, &c.
I valks up and down vith the tears in my hye;
Vot they vonce call'd a vaggon is now call'd a fly;
And the boys points their fingers, and calls I--a “Guy!
O, the old times of Old England,
O dear, the good English old times.”
~324~~There is a stair-case in each front, and one on each side, which
lead to a gallery above, running round the whole building, containing
the offices of various establishments; but I believe, in the original
plan, shops were intended to fill the building to the top. At present,
the upper rooms are occupied by Lloyd's celebrated Subscription
Coffee-house, for the use of Under-writers and Merchants--by the Royal
Exchange Insurance Company, and various offices of individuals. There
are also the Gresham Lecture--Rooms, where lectures are read pursuant to
the will of the late Sir Thomas Gresham, who bequeathed to the City of
London and the Mercers' Company, all the profits arising from these and
other premises in Cornhill, in trust to pay salaries to four lecturers
in divinity, astronomy, music, and geometry; and three readers in civil
law, physic, and rhetoric, who read lectures daily in term time.
“This we may consider the grand mart of the universe! where congregate
those sons of Commerce the British Merchants, who, in dauntless extent
of enterprise, hold such distinguished pre-eminence!”
Tallyho viewed the scene before him with an inquisitive eye, and was
evidently wrapped in surprise at the “busy hum of men,” all actuated
by one universal object, the acquisition of wealth. The spacious area
exhibited a mass of mercantile speculators, numerously grouped, in
conversation; under the piazzas appeared a moving multitude in like