The Adventures of Roderick Random
and lastly, my age having made the common people look upon me as
something preternatural, and I am actually, at this hour, believed to
be a witch. The parson of the parish, whose acquaintance I have not
been at much pains to cultivate, taking umbrage at my supposed
disrespect, has contributed not a little towards the confirmation of
this opinion, by dropping certain hints to my prejudice among the
vulgar, who are also very much scandalised at my entertaining this poor
tabby cat with the collar about her neck, which was a favourite of my
deceased companion.”
The whole behaviour of this venerable person was so primitive,
innocent, sensible, and humane, that I contracted a filial respect for
her, and begged her advice with regard to my future conduct, as soon as
I was in a condition to act for myself. She dissuaded me from a design
I had formed of travelling to London, in hopes of retrieving my clothes
and pay, by returning to my ship, which by this time I read in the
newspaper was safely arrived in the River Thames: “because,” said she,
“you run the hazard of being treated not only as a deserter in quitting
the sloop, but also as a mutineer, in assaulting your commanding
officer, to the malice of whose revenge you will moreover be exposed.”
She then promised to recommend me, as servant to a single lady of her
acquaintance, who lived in the neighbourhood with her nephew, who was a
young foxhunter of great fortune, where I might be very happy, provided
I could bear with the disposition and manners of my mistress, which
were somewhat whimsical and particular. But, above all things, she
counselled me to conceal my story, the knowledge of which would
effectually poison my entertainment; for it was a maxim, among most
people of condition, that no gentleman ought to be admitted into a
family as a domestic, lest he become lazy, and insolent. I was fain to
embrace this humble proposal, because my affairs were desperate; and in
a few days was hired by this lady, to serve in quality of her footman,
having been represented by my hostess as a young man who was bred up to
the sea by his relations against his will, and had suffered shipwreck,
which had increased his disgust to that way of life so much, that he
rather chose to go to service on shore, than enter himself on board of
any other ship. Before I took possession of my new place, she gave me a
sketch of my mistress’s character, that I might know better how to
regulate my conduct.
“Your lady,” said she, “is a maiden of forty years, not so remarkable
for her beauty as her learning and taste, which is famous all over the
country. Indeed, she is a perfect female virtuoso, and so eager after
the pursuit of knowledge that she neglects her person even to a degree
of sluttishness; this negligence, together with her contempt of the
male part of the creation, gives her nephew no great concern, as by
these means he will probably keep her fortune, which is considerable in
the family. He therefore permits her to live in her own way, which is
something extraordinary, and gratifies her in all her whimsical
desires. Her apartment is at some distance from the other inhabited
parts of the house; and consists of a dining-room, bedchamber, and
study; she keeps a cook maid, a waiting-woman, and footman, of her own,
and seldom eats or converses with any of the family but her niece, who
is a very lovely creature, and humours her aunt often to the prejudice
of her own health by sitting up with her whole nights together; for
your mistress is too much of a philosopher to be swayed by the custom
of the world, and never sleeps nor eats like other people. Among other
odd notions, she professes the principles of Rosicrucius, and believes
the earth, air, and sea, are inhabited by invisible beings, with whom
it is possible for the human species to entertain correspondence and
intimacy, on the easy condition of living chaste. As she hopes one day
to be admitted into an acquaintance of this kind, she no sooner heard
of me and my cat, than she paid me a visit, with a view, as she has
since owned, to be introduced to my familiar; and was greatly mortified
to find herself disappointed in her expectation. Being by this
visionary turn of mind abstracted as it were from the world, she cannot
advert to the common occurrences of life; and therefore is frequently
so absent as to commit very strange mistakes and extravagancies, which
you will do well to rectify and repair, as your prudence shall
suggest.”
CHAPTER XXXIX
My Reception by that Lady—I become enamoured of Narcissa—recount the
particulars of my last misfortune—acquire the good opinion of my
Mistress—an Account of the young Squire—I am made acquainted with more
particulars of Narcissa’s Situation—conceive a mortal hatred against
Sir Timothy—examine my Lady’s library and performances—her extravagant
behaviour
Fraught with these useful instructions, I repaired to the place of her
habitation, and was introduced by the waiting-woman to the presence of
my lady, who had not before seen me. She sat in her study, with one
foot on the ground, and the other upon a high stool at some distance
from her seat; her sandy locks hung down, in a disorder I cannot call
beautiful, from her head, which was deprived of its coif, for the
benefit of scratching with one hand, while she held the stump of a pen
in the other. Her forehead was high and wrinkled; her eyes were large,
gray, and prominent; her nose was long, and aquiline: her mouth of vast
capacity, her visage meagre and freckled, and her chin peaked like a
shoemaker’s paring knife; her upper lip contained a large quantity of
plain Spanish, which, by continual falling, had embroidered her neck,
that was not naturally very white, and the breast of her gown, that
flowed loose about her with a negligence that was truly poetic,
discovering linen that was very fine, and, to all appearance, never
washed but in Castalian streams. Around her lay heaps of books, globes,
quadrants, telescopes, and other learned apparatus; her snuff-box stood
at her right hand: at her left hand lay her handkerchief, sufficiently
used, and a convenience to spit in appeared on one side of her chair.
She being in a reverie when we entered, the maid did not think proper
to disturb her; so that we waited some minutes unobserved, during which
time she bit the quill several times, altered her position, made many
wry faces, and, at length, with an air of triumph, repeated aloud:
“Nor dare th’immortal gods my rage oppose!”
Having committed her success to paper, she turned towards the door, and
perceiving us, cried, “What’s the matter?” “Here’s the young man,”
replied my conductress, “whom Mrs. Sagely recommended as a footman to
your ladyship.” On this information she stared in my face for a
considerable time, and then asked my name, which I thought proper to
conceal under that of John Brown. After having surveyed me with a
curious eye, she broke out into, “O! ay, thou wast shipwrecked, I
remember. Whether didst thou come on shore on the back of a whale or a
dolphin?” To this I answered, I had swam ashore without any assistance.
Then she demanded to know if I had ever been at the Hellespont, and
swam from Sestos to Abydos. I replied in the negative; upon which she
bade the maid order a suit of new livery for me, and instruct me in the
articles of my duty: so she spit in her snuff-box, and wiped her nose
with her cap, which lay on the table, instead of a handkerchief.
We returned to the kitchen, where I was regaled by the maids, who
seemed to vie with each other in expressing their regard for me; and
from them I understood, that my business consisted in cleaning knives
and forks, laying the cloth, waiting at table, carrying messages, and
attending my lady when she went abroad. There was a very good suit of
livery in the house, which had belonged to my predecessor deceased, and
it fitted me exactly; so that there was no occasion for employing a
tailor on my account. I had not been long equipped in this manner, when
my lady’s bell rung; upon which, I ran up stairs, and found her
stalking about the room in her shift and under petticoat only; I would
immediately have retired as became me, but she bade me come in, and air
a clean shift for her; which operation I having performed with some
backwardness, she put it on before me without any ceremony, and I
verily believe was ignorant of my sex all that time, as being quite
absorbed in contemplation. About four o’clock in the afternoon I was
ordered to lay the cloth, and place two covers, which I understood were
for my mistress and her niece, whom I had not as yet seen. Though I was
not very dexterous at this work, I performed it pretty well for a
beginner, and, when dinner was upon the table, saw my mistress
approach, accompanied by the young lady, whose name for the present
shall be Narcissa. So much sweetness appeared in the countenance and
carriage of this amiable apparition, that my heart was captivated at
first sight, and while dinner lasted, I gazed upon her without
intermission. Her age seemed to be seventeen, her stature tall, her
shape unexceptionable, her hair, that fell down upon her ivory neck in
ringlets, black as jet; her arched eyebrows of the same colour; her
eyes piercing, yet tender; her lips of the consistence and hue of
cherries; her complexion clear, delicate and healthy; her aspect noble,
ingenuous, and humane; and the whole person so ravishingly delightful,
that it was impossible for any creature endued with sensibility, to see
without admiring, and admire without loving her to excess. I began to
curse the servile station that placed me so far beneath the regard of
this idol of my adoration! and yet I blessed my fate, that enabled me
to enjoy daily the sight of so much perfection! When she spoke I
listened with pleasure; but when she spoke to me, my soul was thrilled
with an extacy of tumultuous joy. I was even so happy as to be the
subject of their conversation; for Narcissa, having observed me, said
to her aunt, “I see your new footman is come.” Then addressing herself
to me, asked, with ineffable complacency, if I was the person who had
been so cruelly used by robbers? When I had satisfied her in this; she
expressed a desire of knowing the other particulars of my fortune, both
before and since my being shipwrecked: hereupon (as Mrs. Sagely had
counselled me) I told her that I had been bound apprentice to the
master of a ship, contrary to my inclination, which ship had foundered
at sea; that I and four more, who chanced to be on deck when she went
down, made shift to swim to the shore, when my companions, after having
overpowered me, stripped me to the shirt, and left me, as they
imagined, dead of the wounds I received in my own defence. Then I
related the circumstances of being found in a barn, with the inhuman
treatment I met with from the country people and parson; the
description of which, I perceived, drew tears from the charming
creature’s eyes. When I had finished my recital, my mistress, said, “Ma
foi! le garçon est bien fait!” To which opinion Narcissa assented, with
a compliment to my understanding, in the same language, that flattered
my vanity extremely.
The conversation, among other subjects, turned upon the young squire,
whom my lady inquired after under the title of the Savage; and was
informed by her niece that he was still in bed, repairing the fatigue
of last night’s debauch, and recruiting strength and spirits to undergo
a fox chase to-morrow morning, in company with Sir Timothy Thicket,
Squire Bumper, and a great many other gentlemen of the same stamp, whom
he had invited on that occasion! so that by daybreak the whole house
would be in an uproar. This was a very disagreeable piece of news to