The Canterbury Tales, and Other Poems
How Xantippe cast piss upon his head.
This silly man sat still, as he were dead,
He wip’d his head, and no more durst he sayn,
But, “Ere the thunder stint* there cometh rain.” *ceases
Of Phasiphae, that was queen of Crete,
For shrewedness* he thought the tale sweet. *wickedness
Fy, speak no more, it is a grisly thing,
Of her horrible lust and her liking.
Of Clytemnestra, for her lechery
That falsely made her husband for to die,
He read it with full good devotion.
He told me eke, for what occasion
Amphiorax at Thebes lost his life:
My husband had a legend of his wife
Eryphile, that for an ouche* of gold *clasp, collar
Had privily unto the Greekes told,
Where that her husband hid him in a place,
For which he had at Thebes sorry grace.
Of Luna told he me, and of Lucie;
They bothe made their husbands for to die,
That one for love, that other was for hate.
Luna her husband on an ev’ning late
Empoison’d had, for that she was his foe:
Lucia liquorish lov’d her husband so,
That, for he should always upon her think,
She gave him such a manner* love-drink, *sort of
That he was dead before it were the morrow:
And thus algates* husbands hadde sorrow. *always
Then told he me how one Latumeus
Complained to his fellow Arius
That in his garden growed such a tree,
On which he said how that his wives three
Hanged themselves for heart dispiteous.
“O leve* brother,” quoth this Arius, *dear
“Give me a plant of thilke* blessed tree, *that
And in my garden planted shall it be.”
Of later date of wives hath he read,
That some have slain their husbands in their bed,
And let their *lechour dight them* all the night, *lover ride them*
While that the corpse lay on the floor upright:
And some have driven nails into their brain,
While that they slept, and thus they have them slain:
Some have them given poison in their drink:
He spake more harm than hearte may bethink.
And therewithal he knew of more proverbs,
Than in this world there groweth grass or herbs.
“Better (quoth he) thine habitation
Be with a lion, or a foul dragon,
Than with a woman using for to chide.
Better (quoth he) high in the roof abide,
Than with an angry woman in the house,
They be so wicked and contrarious:
They hate that their husbands loven aye.”
He said, “A woman cast her shame away
When she cast off her smock;” and farthermo’,
“A fair woman, but* she be chaste also, *except
Is like a gold ring in a sowe’s nose.
Who coulde ween,* or who coulde suppose *think
The woe that in mine heart was, and the pine?* *pain
And when I saw that he would never fine* *finish
To readen on this cursed book all night,
All suddenly three leaves have I plight* *plucked
Out of his book, right as he read, and eke
I with my fist so took him on the cheek,
That in our fire he backward fell adown.
And he up start, as doth a wood* lion, *furious
And with his fist he smote me on the head,
That on the floor I lay as I were dead.
And when he saw how still that there I lay,
He was aghast, and would have fled away,
Till at the last out of my swoon I braid,* *woke
“Oh, hast thou slain me, thou false thief?” I said
“And for my land thus hast thou murder’d me?
Ere I be dead, yet will I kisse thee.”
And near he came, and kneeled fair adown,
And saide”, “Deare sister Alisoun,
As help me God, I shall thee never smite:
That I have done it is thyself to wite,* *blame
Forgive it me, and that I thee beseek.”* *beseech
And yet eftsoons* I hit him on the cheek, *immediately; again
And saidde, “Thief, thus much am I awreak.* *avenged
Now will I die, I may no longer speak.”
But at the last, with muche care and woe
We fell accorded* by ourselves two: *agreed
He gave me all the bridle in mine hand
To have the governance of house and land,
And of his tongue, and of his hand also.
I made him burn his book anon right tho.* *then
And when that I had gotten unto me
By mast’ry all the sovereignety,
And that he said, “Mine owen true wife,
Do *as thee list,* the term of all thy life, *as pleases thee*
Keep thine honour, and eke keep mine estate;
After that day we never had debate.
God help me so, I was to him as kind
As any wife from Denmark unto Ind,
And also true, and so was he to me:
I pray to God that sits in majesty
So bless his soule, for his mercy dear.
Now will I say my tale, if ye will hear. —
The Friar laugh’d when he had heard all this:
“Now, Dame,” quoth he, “so have I joy and bliss,
This is a long preamble of a tale.”
And when the Sompnour heard the Friar gale,* *speak
“Lo,” quoth this Sompnour, “Godde’s armes two,
A friar will intermete* him evermo’: *interpose <33>
Lo, goode men, a fly and eke a frere
Will fall in ev’ry dish and eke mattere.
What speak’st thou of perambulation?* *preamble
What? amble or trot; or peace, or go sit down:
Thou lettest* our disport in this mattere.” *hinderesst
“Yea, wilt thou so, Sir Sompnour?” quoth the Frere;
“Now by my faith I shall, ere that I go,
Tell of a Sompnour such a tale or two,
That all the folk shall laughen in this place.”
“Now do, else, Friar, I beshrew* thy face,” *curse
Quoth this Sompnour; “and I beshrewe me,
But if* I telle tales two or three *unless
Of friars, ere I come to Sittingbourne,
That I shall make thine hearte for to mourn:
For well I wot thy patience is gone.”
Our Hoste cried, “Peace, and that anon;”
And saide, “Let the woman tell her tale.
Ye fare* as folk that drunken be of ale. *behave
Do, Dame, tell forth your tale, and that is best.”
“All ready, sir,” quoth she, “right as you lest,* *please
If I have licence of this worthy Frere.”
“Yes, Dame,” quoth he, “tell forth, and I will hear.”
Notes to the Prologue to the Wife of Bath’s Tale
1. Among the evidences that Chaucer’s great work was left
incomplete, is the absence of any link of connexion between the
Wife of Bath’s Prologue and Tale, and what goes before. This
deficiency has in some editions caused the Squire’s and the
Merchant’s Tales to be interposed between those of the Man of
Law and the Wife of Bath; but in the Merchant’s Tale there is
internal proof that it was told after the jolly Dame’s. Several
manuscripts contain verses designed to serve as a connexion;
but they are evidently not Chaucer’s, and it is unnecessary to
give them here. Of this Prologue, which may fairly be regarded
as a distinct autobiographical tale, Tyrwhitt says: “The
extraordinary length of it, as well as the vein of pleasantry that
runs through it, is very suitable to the character of the speaker.
The greatest part must have been of Chaucer’s own invention,
though one may plainly see that he had been reading the popular
invectives against marriage and women in general; such as the
‘Roman de la Rose,’ ‘Valerius ad Rufinum, De non Ducenda
Uxore,’ (‘Valerius to Rufinus, on not being ruled by one’s wife’)
and particularly ‘Hieronymus contra Jovinianum.’ (‘Jerome
against Jovinianus’) St Jerome, among other things designed to
discourage marriage, has inserted in his treatise a long passage
from ‘Liber Aureolus Theophrasti de Nuptiis.’ (‘Theophrastus’s
Golden Book of Marriage’).”
2. A great part of the marriage service used to be performed in
the church-porch.
3. Jesus and the Samaritan woman: John iv. 13.
4. Dan: Lord; Latin, “dominus.” Another reading is “the wise
man, King Solomon.”
5. Defended: forbade; French, “defendre,” to prohibit.
6. Dart: the goal; a spear or dart was set up to mark the point of
victory.
7. “But in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and
silver, but also of wood and of earth; and some to honour, and
some to dishonour.” — 2 Tim. ii 20.
8. Jesus feeding the multitude with barley bread: Mark vi. 41,
42.
9. At Dunmow prevailed the custom of giving, amid much
merry making, a flitch of bacon to the married pair who had
lived together for a year without quarrel or regret. The same
custom prevailed of old in Bretagne.
10. “Cagnard,” or “Caignard,” a French term of reproach,
originally derived from “canis,” a dog.
11. Parage: birth, kindred; from Latin, “pario,” I beget.
12. Norice: nurse; French, “nourrice.”
13. This and the previous quotation from Ptolemy are due to
the Dame’s own fancy.
14. (Transcriber’s note: Some Victorian censorship here. The
word given in [brackets] should be “queint” i.e. “cunt”.)
15. Women should not adorn themselves: see I Tim. ii. 9.
16. Cherte: affection; from French, “cher,” dear.
17. Nicety: folly; French, “niaiserie.”
18. Ba: kiss; from French, “baiser.”
19. Peter!: by Saint Peter! a common adjuration, like Marie!
from the Virgin’s name.
20. St. Joce: or Judocus, a saint of Ponthieu, in France.
21. “An allusion,” says Mr Wright, “to the story of the Roman
sage who, when blamed for divorcing his wife, said that a shoe
might appear outwardly to fit well, but no one but the wearer
knew where it pinched.”
22. Vigilies: festival-eves; see note 33 to the Prologue to the
Tales.
23. Bobance: boasting; Ben Jonson’s braggart, in “Every Man in
his Humour,” is named Bobadil.
24. “I hold a mouse’s wit not worth a leek,
That hath but one hole for to starte to”
A very old proverb in French, German, and Latin.
25. The lines in brackets are only in some of the manuscripts.
26. Gat-toothed: gap-toothed; goat-toothed; or cat- or separate
toothed. See note 41 to the prologue to the Tales.
27. Sempronius Sophus, of whom Valerius Maximus tells in his
sixth book.
28. The tract of Walter Mapes against marriage, published
under the title of “Epistola Valerii ad Rufinum.”
29. “Ars Amoris.”
30. All the mark of Adam: all who bear the mark of Adam i.e.
all men.
31. The Children of Mercury and Venus: those born under the
influence of the respective planets.
32. A planet, according to the old astrologers, was in
“exaltation” when in the sign of the Zodiac in which it exerted
its strongest influence; the opposite sign, in which it was
weakest, was called its “dejection.” Venus being strongest in
Pisces, was weakest in Virgo; but in Virgo Mercury was in
“exaltation.”
33. Intermete: interpose; French, “entremettre.”
THE TALE. <1>
In olde dayes of the king Arthour,
Of which that Britons speake great honour,
All was this land full fill’d of faerie;* *fairies
The Elf-queen, with her jolly company,
Danced full oft in many a green mead
This was the old opinion, as I read;
I speak of many hundred years ago;
But now can no man see none elves mo’,
For now the great charity and prayeres
Of limitours,* and other holy freres, *begging friars <2>
That search every land and ev’ry stream
As thick as motes in the sunne-beam,
Blessing halls, chambers, kitchenes, and bowers,
Cities and burghes, castles high and towers,
Thorpes* and barnes, shepens** and dairies, *villages <3> **stables
This makes that there be now no faeries:
For *there as* wont to walke was an elf, *where*
There walketh now the limitour himself,
In undermeles* and in morrowings**, *evenings <4> **mornings
And saith his matins and his holy things,
As he goes in his limitatioun.* *begging district
Women may now go safely up and down,