The Lives of the Twelve Caesars, Complete
extremity of laying violent hands upon himself, he commended, indeed, the
attachment to his person of those who manifested so much indignation, but
he shed tears, and lamented his unhappy condition, “That I alone,” said
he, “cannot be allowed to resent the misconduct of my friends in such a
way only as I would wish.” The rest of his friends of all orders
flourished during their whole lives, both in power and wealth, in the
highest ranks of their several orders, notwithstanding some occasional
lapses. For, to say nothing of others, he sometimes complained that
Agrippa was hasty, and Mecaenas a tattler; the former having thrown up
all his employments and retired to Mitylene, on suspicion of some slight
coolness, and from jealousy that Marcellus received greater marks of
favour; and the latter having confidentially imparted to his wife
Terentia the discovery of Muraena’s conspiracy.
He likewise expected from his friends, at their deaths as well as during
their lives, some proofs of their reciprocal attachment. For though he
was far from coveting their property, and indeed would never accept of
any legacy left him by a stranger, yet he pondered in a melancholy mood
over their last words; not being able to conceal his chagrin, if in their
wills they made but a slight, or no very honourable mention of him, nor
his joy, on the other hand, if they expressed a grateful sense of his
favours, and a hearty affection for him. And whatever legacies or shares
of their property were left him by such as were parents, he used to
restore to their children, either immediately, or if they were under age,
upon the day of their assuming the manly dress, or of their marriage;
with interest.
LXVII. As a patron and master, his behaviour in general was mild and
conciliating; but when occasion required it, he (121) could be severe.
He advanced many of his freedmen to posts of honour and great importance,
as Licinus, Enceladus, and others; and when his slave, Cosmus, had
reflected bitterly upon him, he resented the injury no further than by
putting him in fetters. When his steward, Diomedes, left him to the
mercy of a wild boar, which suddenly attacked them while they were
walking together, he considered it rather a cowardice than a breach of
duty; and turned an occurrence of no small hazard into a jest, because
there was no knavery in his steward’s conduct. He put to death Proculus,
one of his most favourite freedmen, for maintaining a criminal commerce
with other men’s wives. He broke the legs of his secretary, Thallus, for
taking a bribe of five hundred denarii to discover the contents of one of
his letters. And the tutor and other attendants of his son Caius, having
taken advantage of his sickness and death, to give loose to their
insolence and rapacity in the province he governed, he caused heavy
weights to be tied about their necks, and had them thrown into a river.
LXVIII. In his early youth various aspersions of an infamous character
were heaped upon him. Sextus Pompey reproached him with being an
effeminate fellow; and M. Antony, with earning his adoption from his
uncle by prostitution. Lucius Antony, likewise Mark’s brother, charges
him with pollution by Caesar; and that, for a gratification of three
hundred thousand sesterces, he had submitted to Aulus Hirtius in the same
way, in Spain; adding, that he used to singe his legs with burnt
nut-shells, to make the hair become softer [207]. Nay, the whole
concourse of the people, at some public diversions in the theatre, when
the following sentence was recited, alluding to the Gallic priest of the
mother of the gods [208], beating a drum [209],
Videsne ut cinaedus orbem digito temperet?
See with his orb the wanton’s finger play!
applied the passage to him, with great applause.
(122) LXIX. That he was guilty of various acts of adultery, is not
denied even by his friends; but they allege in excuse for it, that he
engaged in those intrigues not from lewdness, but from policy, in order
to discover more easily the designs of his enemies, through their wives.
Mark Antony, besides the precipitate marriage of Livia, charges him with
taking the wife of a man of consular rank from table, in the presence of
her husband, into a bed-chamber, and bringing her again to the
entertainment, with her ears very red, and her hair in great disorder:
that he had divorced Scribonia, for resenting too freely the excessive
influence which one of his mistresses had gained over him: that his
friends were employed to pimp for him, and accordingly obliged both
matrons and ripe virgins to strip, for a complete examination of their
persons, in the same manner as if Thoranius, the dealer in slaves, had
them under sale. And before they came to an open rupture, he writes to
him in a familiar manner, thus: “Why are you changed towards me? Because
I lie with a queen? She is my wife. Is this a new thing with me, or
have I not done so for these nine years? And do you take freedoms with
Drusilla only? May health and happiness so attend you, as when you read
this letter, you are not in dalliance with Tertulla, Terentilla, Rufilla
[210], or Salvia Titiscenia, or all of them. What matters it to you
where, or upon whom, you spend your manly vigour?”
LXX. A private entertainment which he gave, commonly called the Supper
of the Twelve Gods [211], and at which the guests (123) were dressed in
the habit of gods and goddesses, while he personated Apollo himself,
afforded subject of much conversation, and was imputed to him not only by
Antony in his letters, who likewise names all the parties concerned, but
in the following well-known anonymous verses:
Cum primum istorum conduxit mensa choragum,
Sexque deos vidit Mallia, sexque deas
Impia dum Phoebi Caesar mendacia ludit,
Dum nova divorum coenat adulteria:
Omnia se a terris tunc numina declinarunt:
Fugit et auratos Jupiter ipse thronos.
When Mallia late beheld, in mingled train,
Twelve mortals ape twelve deities in vain;
Caesar assumed what was Apollo’s due,
And wine and lust inflamed the motley crew.
At the foul sight the gods avert their eyes,
And from his throne great Jove indignant flies.
What rendered this supper more obnoxious to public censure, was that it
happened at a time when there was a great scarcity, and almost a famine,
in the city. The day after, there was a cry current among the people,
“that the gods had eaten up all the corn; and that Caesar was indeed
Apollo, but Apollo the Tormentor;” under which title that god was
worshipped in some quarter of the city [212]. He was likewise charged
with being excessively fond of fine furniture, and Corinthian vessels, as
well as with being addicted to gaming. For, during the time of the
proscription, the following line was written upon his statue:--
Pater argentarius, ego Corinthiarius;
My father was a silversmith [213], my dealings are in brass;
because it was believed, that he had put some persons upon the list of
the proscribed, only to obtain the Corinthian vessels in (124) their
possession. And afterwards, in the Sicilian war, the following epigram
was published:--
Postquam bis classe victus naves perdidit,
Aliquando ut vincat, ludit assidue aleam.
Twice having lost a fleet in luckless fight,
To win at last, he games both day and night.
LXXI. With respect to the charge or imputation of loathsome impurity
before-mentioned, he very easily refuted it by the chastity of his life,
at the very time when it was made, as well as ever afterwards. His
conduct likewise gave the lie to that of luxurious extravagance in his
furniture, when, upon the taking of Alexandria, he reserved for himself
nothing of the royal treasures but a porcelain cup, and soon afterwards
melted down all the vessels of gold, even such as were intended for
common use. But his amorous propensities never left him, and, as he grew
older, as is reported, he was in the habit of debauching young girls, who
were procured for him, from all quarters, even by his own wife. To the
observations on his gaming, he paid not the smallest regard; but played
in public, but purely for his diversion, even when he was advanced in
years; and not only in the month of December [214], but at other times,
and upon all days, whether festivals or not. This evidently appears from
a letter under his own hand, in which he says, “I supped, my dear
Tiberius, with the same company. We had, besides, Vinicius, and Silvius
the father. We gamed at supper like old fellows, both yesterday and
today. And as any one threw upon the tali [215] aces or sixes, he put
down for every talus a denarius; all which was gained by him who threw a
Venus.” [216] In another letter, he says: “We had, my dear Tiberius, a
pleasant time of it during the festival of Minerva: for we played every
day, and kept the gaming-board warm. Your brother uttered many
exclamations at a desperate run of ill-fortune; but recovering by
degrees, and unexpectedly, he in the end lost not much. I lost twenty
thousand sesterces for my part; but then I was profusely (125) generous
in my play, as I commonly am; for had I insisted upon the stakes which I
declined, or kept what I gave away, I should have won about fifty
thousand. But this I like better for it will raise my character for
generosity to the skies.” In a letter to his daughter, he writes thus:
“I have sent you two hundred and fifty denarii, which I gave to every one
of my guests; in case they were inclined at supper to divert themselves
with the Tali, or at the game of Even-or-Odd.”
LXXII. In other matters, it appears that he was moderate in his habits,
and free from suspicion of any kind of vice. He lived at first near the
Roman Forum, above the Ring-maker’s Stairs, in a house which had once
been occupied by Calvus the orator. He afterwards moved to the Palatine
Hill, where he resided in a small house [217] belonging to Hortensius, no
way remarkable either for size or ornament; the piazzas being but small,
the pillars of Alban stone [218], and the rooms without any thing of
marble, or fine paving. He continued to use the same bed-chamber, both
winter and summer, during forty years [219]: for though he was sensible
that the city did not agree with his health in the winter, he
nevertheless resided constantly in it during that season. If at any time
he wished to be perfectly retired, and secure from interruption, he shut
himself up in an apartment at the top of his house, which he called his
Syracuse or Technophuon [220], or he went to some villa belonging to his
freedmen near the city. But when he was indisposed, he commonly took up
his residence in the house of Mecaenas [221]. Of all the places of
retirement from the city, he (126) chiefly frequented those upon the
sea-coast, and the islands of Campania [222], or the towns nearest the
city, such as Lanuvium, Praeneste, and Tibur [223], where he often used to
sit for the administration of justice, in the porticos of the temple of
Hercules. He had a particular aversion to large and sumptuous palaces;
and some which had been raised at a vast expense by his grand-daughter,
Julia, he levelled to the ground. Those of his own, which were far from
being spacious, he adorned, not so much with statues and pictures, as with
walks and groves, and things which were curious either for their antiquity
or rarity; such as, at Capri, the huge limbs of sea-monsters and wild
beasts, which some affect to call the bones of giants; and also the arms
of ancient heroes.
LXXIII. His frugality in the furniture of his house appears even at this
day, from some beds and tables still remaining, most of which are
scarcely elegant enough for a private family. It is reported that he