The Phantom 'Rickshaw, and Other Ghost Stories
everything? How can daughters of men marry Gods or Devils? It’s not
proper.’
“I remembered something like that in the Bible; but, if after seeing us
as long as they had, they still believed we were Gods, it wasn’t for me
to undeceive them.
“‘A God can do anything,’ says I. ‘If the King is fond of a girl he’ll
not let her die.’ ‘She’ll have to,’ said Billy Fish. ‘There are all
sorts of Gods and Devils in these mountains, and now and again a girl
marries one of them and isn’t seen any more. Besides, you two know the
Mark cut in the stone. Only the Gods know that. We thought you were men
till you showed the sign of the Master.’
“I wished then that we had explained about the loss of the genuine
secrets of a Master Mason at the first go-off; but I said nothing. All
that night there was a blowing of horns in a little dark temple half-way
down the hill, and I heard the girl crying fit to die. One of the
priests told us that she was being prepared to marry the King.
“‘I’ll have no nonsense of that kind,’ says Dan. ‘I don’t want to
interfere with your customs, but I’ll take my own wife.’ ‘The girl’s a
little bit afraid,’ says the priest. ‘She thinks she’s going to die, and
they are a-heartening of her up down in the temple.’
“‘Hearten her very tender, then,’ says Dravot, ‘or I’ll hearten you with
the butt of a gun so you’ll never want to be heartened again.’ He licked
his lips, did Dan, and stayed up walking about more than half the night,
thinking of the wife that he was going to get in the morning. I wasn’t
any means comfortable, for I knew that dealings with a woman in foreign
parts, though you was a crowned King twenty times over, could not but be
risky. I got up very early in the morning while Dravot was asleep, and
I saw the priests talking together in whispers, and the Chiefs talking
together too, and they looked at me out of the corners of their eyes.
“‘What is up, Fish?’ I say to the Bashkai man, who was wrapped up in his
furs and looking splendid to behold.
“‘I can’t rightly say,’ says he; ‘but if you can make the King drop all
this nonsense about marriage, you’ll be doing him and me and yourself a
great service.’
“‘That I do believe,’ says I. ‘But sure, you know, Billy, as well as me,
having fought against and for us, that the King and me are nothing more
than two of the finest men that God Almighty ever made. Nothing more, I
do assure you.’
“‘That may be,’ says Billy Fish, ‘and yet I should be sorry if it was.’
He sinks his head upon his great fur cloak for a minute and thinks.
‘King,’ says he, ‘be you man or God or Devil, I’ll stick by you to-day.
I have twenty of my men with me, and they will follow me. We’ll go to
Bashkai until the storm blows over.’
“A little snow had fallen in the night, and everything was white except
the greasy fat clouds that blew down and down from the north. Dravot
came out with his crown on his head, swinging his arms and stamping his
feet, and looking more pleased than Punch.
“‘For the last time, drop it, Dan,’ says I, in a whisper; ‘Billy Fish
here says that there will be a row.’
“‘A row among my people!’ says Dravot. ‘Not much. Peachey, you’re a fool
not to get a wife too. Where’s the girl?’ says he, with a voice as loud
as the braying of a jackass. ‘Call up all the Chiefs and priests, and
let the Emperor see if his wife suits him.’
“There was no need to call any one. They were all there leaning on their
guns and spears round the clearing in the centre of the pine wood. A lot
of priests went down to the little temple to bring up the girl, and the
horns blew fit to wake the dead. Billy Fish saunters round and gets as
close to Daniel as he could, and behind him stood his twenty men with
matchlocks--not a man of them under six feet. I was next to Dravot, and
behind me was twenty men of the regular Army. Up comes the girl, and a
strapping wench she was, covered with silver and turquoises, but white
as death, and looking back every minute at the priests.
“‘She’ll do,’ said Dan, looking her over. ‘What’s to be afraid of, lass?
Come and kiss me.’ He puts his arm round her. She shuts her eyes,
gives a bit of a squeak, and down goes her face in the side of Dan’s
flaming-red beard.
“‘The slut’s bitten me!’ says he, clapping his hand to his neck, and,
sure enough, his hand was red with blood. Billy Fish and two of his
matchlock men catches hold of Dan by the shoulders and drags him into
the Bashkai lot, while the priests howls in their lingo, ‘Neither God
nor Devil, but a man!’ I was all taken aback, for a priest cut at me in
front, and the Army behind began firing into the Bashkai men.
“‘God A’mighty!’ says Dan, ‘what is the meaning o’ this?’
“‘Come back! Come away!’ says Billy Fish. ‘Ruin and Mutiny is the
matter. We’ll break for Bashkai if we can.’
“I tried to give some sort of orders to my men,--the men o’ the regular
Army,--but it was no use, so I fired into the brown of ‘em with an
English Martini and drilled three beggars in a line. The valley was full
of shouting, howling creatures, and every soul was shrieking, ‘Not a God
nor a Devil, but only a man!’ The Bashkai troops stuck to Billy Fish all
they were worth, but their matchlocks wasn’t half as good as the Kabul
breech-loaders, and four of them dropped. Dan was bellowing like a bull,
for he was very wrathy; and Billy Fish had a hard job to prevent him
running out at the crowd.
“‘We can’t stand,’ says Billy Fish. ‘Make a run for it down the valley!
The whole place is against us.’ The matchlock-men ran, and we went down
the valley in spite of Dravot. He was swearing horrible and crying
out that he was a King. The priests rolled great stones on us, and
the regular Army fired hard, and there wasn’t more than six men, not
counting Dan, Billy Fish, and Me, that came down to the bottom of the
valley alive.
“Then they stopped firing, and the horns in the temple blew again. ‘Come
away--for Gord’s sake come away!’ says Billy Fish. ‘They’ll send runners
out to all the villages before ever we get to Bashkai. I can protect you
there, but I can’t do anything now.”
“My own notion is that Dan began to go mad in his head from that hour.
He stared up and down like a stuck pig. Then he was all for walking back
alone and killing the priests with his bare hands; which he could have
done. ‘An Emperor am I,’ says Daniel, ‘and next year I shall be a Knight
of the Queen.’
“‘All right, Dan,’ says I; ‘but come along now while there’s time.’
“‘It’s your fault,’ says he, ‘for not looking after your Army better.
There was mutiny in the midst, and you didn’t know--you damned
engine-driving, plate-laying, missionary’s-pass-hunting hound!’ He sat
upon a rock and called me every foul name he could lay tongue to. I was
too heart-sick to care, though it was all his foolishness that brought
the smash.
“‘I’m sorry, Dan,’ says I, ‘but there’s no accounting for natives. This
business is our Fifty-seven. Maybe we’ll make something out of it yet,
when we’ve got to Bashkai.’
“‘Let’s get to Bashkai, then,’ says Dan, ‘and, by God, when I come
back here again I’ll sweep the valley so there isn’t a bug in a blanket
left!’
“We walked all that day, and all that night Dan was stumping up and down
on the snow, chewing his beard and muttering to himself.
“‘There’s no hope o’ getting clear,’ said Billy Fish. ‘The priests have
sent runners to the villages to say that you are only men. Why didn’t
you stick on as Gods till things was more settled? I’m a dead man,’ says
Billy Fish, and he throws himself down on the snow and begins to pray to
his Gods.
“Next morning we was in a cruel bad country--all up and down, no level
ground at all, and no food, either. The six Bashkai men looked at Billy
Fish hungry-way as if they wanted to ask something, but they never said
a word. At noon we came to the top of a flat mountain all covered with
snow, and when we climbed up into it, behold, there was an Army in
position waiting in the middle!
“‘The runners have been very quick,’ says Billy Fish, with a little bit
of a laugh. ‘They are waiting for us.’
“Three or four men began to fire from the enemy’s side, and a chance
shot took Daniel in the calf of the leg. That brought him to his senses.
He looks across the snow at the Army, and sees the rifles that we had
brought into the country.
“‘We’re done for,’ says he. ‘They are Englishmen, these people,--and
it’s my blasted nonsense that has brought you to this. Get back, Billy
Fish, and take your men away; you’ve done what you could, and now cut
for it. Carnehan,’ says he, ‘shake hands with me and go along with
Billy. Maybe they won’t kill you. I’ll go and meet ‘em alone. It’s me
that did it! Me, the King!’
“‘Go!’ says I. ‘Go to Hell, Dan! I’m with you here. Billy Fish, you
clear out, and we two will meet those folk.’
“‘I’m a Chief,’ says Billy Fish, quite quiet. ‘I stay with you. My men
can go.’
“The Bashkai fellows didn’t wait for a second word, but ran off, and Dan
and Me and Billy Fish walked across to where the drums were drumming and
the horns were horning. It was cold--awful cold. I’ve got that cold in
the back of my head now. There’s a lump of it there.”
The punka-coolies had gone to sleep. Two kerosene lamps were blazing in
the office, and the perspiration poured down my face and splashed on the
blotter as I leaned forward. Carnehan was shivering, and I feared that
his mind might go. I wiped my face, took a fresh grip of the piteously
mangled hands, and said, “What happened after that?”
The momentary shift of my eyes had broken the clear current.
“What was you pleased to say?” whined Carnehan. “They took them without
any sound. Not a little whisper all along the snow, not though the King
knocked down the first man that set hand on him--not though old Peachey
fired his last cartridge into the brown of ‘em. Not a single solitary
sound did those swines make. They just closed up tight, and I tell you
their furs stunk. There was a man called Billy Fish, a good friend of us
all, and they cut his throat, Sir, then and there, like a pig; and the
King kicks up the bloody snow and says, ‘We’ve had a dashed fine run for
our money. What’s coming next?’ But Peachey, Peachey Taliaferro, I tell
you, Sir, in confidence as betwixt two friends, he lost his head, Sir.
No, he didn’t, neither. The King lost his head, so he did, all along o’
one of those cunning rope bridges. Kindly let me have the paper-cutter,
Sir. It tilted this way. They marched him a mile across that snow to a
rope bridge over a ravine with a river at the bottom. You may have seen
such. They prodded him behind like an ox. ‘Damn your eyes!’ says
the King. ‘D’ you suppose I can’t die like a gentleman?’ He turns to
Peachey--Peachey that was crying like a child. ‘I’ve brought you to
this, Peachey,’ says he. ‘Brought you out of your happy life to be
killed in Kafiristan, where you was late Commander-in-Chief of the
Emperor’s forces. Say you forgive me, Peachey.’ ‘I do,’ says Peachey.
‘Fully and freely do I forgive you, Dan.’ ‘Shake hands, Peachey,’ says
he. ‘I’m going now.’ Out he goes, looking neither right nor left, and
when he was plumb in the middle of those dizzy dancing ropes, ‘Cut you
beggars,’ he shouts; and they cut, and old Dan fell, turning round and
round and round, twenty thousand miles, for he took half an hour to fall
till he struck the water, and I could see his body caught on a rock with
the gold crown close beside.
“But do you know what they did to Peachey between two pine-trees? They
crucified him, Sir, as Peachey’s hand will show. They used wooden pegs
for his hands and feet; but he didn’t die. He hung there and screamed,
and they took him down next day, and said it was a miracle that he
wasn’t dead. They took him down--poor old Peachey that hadn’t done them