The Secret Agent: A Simple Tale
longer calm. She was afraid.
If she avoided looking in the direction of her reposing husband it was
not because she was afraid of him. Mr Verloc was not frightful to
behold. He looked comfortable. Moreover, he was dead. Mrs Verloc
entertained no vain delusions on the subject of the dead. Nothing brings
them back, neither love nor hate. They can do nothing to you. They are
as nothing. Her mental state was tinged by a sort of austere contempt
for that man who had let himself be killed so easily. He had been the
master of a house, the husband of a woman, and the murderer of her
Stevie. And now he was of no account in every respect. He was of less
practical account than the clothing on his body, than his overcoat, than
his boots—than that hat lying on the floor. He was nothing. He was not
worth looking at. He was even no longer the murderer of poor Stevie.
The only murderer that would be found in the room when people came to
look for Mr Verloc would be—herself!
Her hands shook so that she failed twice in the task of refastening her
veil. Mrs Verloc was no longer a person of leisure and responsibility.
She was afraid. The stabbing of Mr Verloc had been only a blow. It had
relieved the pent-up agony of shrieks strangled in her throat, of tears
dried up in her hot eyes, of the maddening and indignant rage at the
atrocious part played by that man, who was less than nothing now, in
robbing her of the boy.
It had been an obscurely prompted blow. The blood trickling on the floor
off the handle of the knife had turned it into an extremely plain case of
murder. Mrs Verloc, who always refrained from looking deep into things,
was compelled to look into the very bottom of this thing. She saw there
no haunting face, no reproachful shade, no vision of remorse, no sort of
ideal conception. She saw there an object. That object was the gallows.
Mrs Verloc was afraid of the gallows.
She was terrified of them ideally. Having never set eyes on that last
argument of men’s justice except in illustrative woodcuts to a certain
type of tales, she first saw them erect against a black and stormy
background, festooned with chains and human bones, circled about by birds
that peck at dead men’s eyes. This was frightful enough, but Mrs Verloc,
though not a well-informed woman, had a sufficient knowledge of the
institutions of her country to know that gallows are no longer erected
romantically on the banks of dismal rivers or on wind-swept headlands,
but in the yards of jails. There within four high walls, as if into a
pit, at dawn of day, the murderer was brought out to be executed, with a
horrible quietness and, as the reports in the newspapers always said, “in
the presence of the authorities.” With her eyes staring on the floor,
her nostrils quivering with anguish and shame, she imagined herself all
alone amongst a lot of strange gentlemen in silk hats who were calmly
proceeding about the business of hanging her by the neck. That—never!
Never! And how was it done? The impossibility of imagining the details
of such quiet execution added something maddening to her abstract terror.
The newspapers never gave any details except one, but that one with some
affectation was always there at the end of a meagre report. Mrs Verloc
remembered its nature. It came with a cruel burning pain into her head,
as if the words “The drop given was fourteen feet” had been scratched on
her brain with a hot needle. “The drop given was fourteen feet.”
These words affected her physically too. Her throat became convulsed in
waves to resist strangulation; and the apprehension of the jerk was so
vivid that she seized her head in both hands as if to save it from being
torn off her shoulders. “The drop given was fourteen feet.” No! that
must never be. She could not stand _that_. The thought of it even was
not bearable. She could not stand thinking of it. Therefore Mrs Verloc
formed the resolution to go at once and throw herself into the river off
one of the bridges.
This time she managed to refasten her veil. With her face as if masked,
all black from head to foot except for some flowers in her hat, she
looked up mechanically at the clock. She thought it must have stopped.
She could not believe that only two minutes had passed since she had
looked at it last. Of course not. It had been stopped all the time. As
a matter of fact, only three minutes had elapsed from the moment she had
drawn the first deep, easy breath after the blow, to this moment when Mrs
Verloc formed the resolution to drown herself in the Thames. But Mrs
Verloc could not believe that. She seemed to have heard or read that
clocks and watches always stopped at the moment of murder for the undoing
of the murderer. She did not care. “To the bridge—and over I go.” . . .
But her movements were slow.
She dragged herself painfully across the shop, and had to hold on to the
handle of the door before she found the necessary fortitude to open it.
The street frightened her, since it led either to the gallows or to the
river. She floundered over the doorstep head forward, arms thrown out,
like a person falling over the parapet of a bridge. This entrance into
the open air had a foretaste of drowning; a slimy dampness enveloped her,
entered her nostrils, clung to her hair. It was not actually raining,
but each gas lamp had a rusty little halo of mist. The van and horses
were gone, and in the black street the curtained window of the carters’
eating-house made a square patch of soiled blood-red light glowing
faintly very near the level of the pavement. Mrs Verloc, dragging
herself slowly towards it, thought that she was a very friendless woman.
It was true. It was so true that, in a sudden longing to see some
friendly face, she could think of no one else but of Mrs Neale, the
charwoman. She had no acquaintances of her own. Nobody would miss her
in a social way. It must not be imagined that the Widow Verloc had
forgotten her mother. This was not so. Winnie had been a good daughter
because she had been a devoted sister. Her mother had always leaned on
her for support. No consolation or advice could be expected there. Now
that Stevie was dead the bond seemed to be broken. She could not face
the old woman with the horrible tale. Moreover, it was too far. The
river was her present destination. Mrs Verloc tried to forget her
mother.
Each step cost her an effort of will which seemed the last possible. Mrs
Verloc had dragged herself past the red glow of the eating-house window.
“To the bridge—and over I go,” she repeated to herself with fierce
obstinacy. She put out her hand just in time to steady herself against a
lamp-post. “I’ll never get there before morning,” she thought. The fear
of death paralysed her efforts to escape the gallows. It seemed to her
she had been staggering in that street for hours. “I’ll never get
there,” she thought. “They’ll find me knocking about the streets. It’s
too far.” She held on, panting under her black veil.
“The drop given was fourteen feet.”
She pushed the lamp-post away from her violently, and found herself
walking. But another wave of faintness overtook her like a great sea,
washing away her heart clean out of her breast. “I will never get
there,” she muttered, suddenly arrested, swaying lightly where she stood.
“Never.”
And perceiving the utter impossibility of walking as far as the nearest
bridge, Mrs Verloc thought of a flight abroad.
It came to her suddenly. Murderers escaped. They escaped abroad. Spain
or California. Mere names. The vast world created for the glory of man
was only a vast blank to Mrs Verloc. She did not know which way to turn.
Murderers had friends, relations, helpers—they had knowledge. She had
nothing. She was the most lonely of murderers that ever struck a mortal
blow. She was alone in London: and the whole town of marvels and mud,
with its maze of streets and its mass of lights, was sunk in a hopeless
night, rested at the bottom of a black abyss from which no unaided woman
could hope to scramble out.
She swayed forward, and made a fresh start blindly, with an awful dread
of falling down; but at the end of a few steps, unexpectedly, she found a
sensation of support, of security. Raising her head, she saw a man’s
face peering closely at her veil. Comrade Ossipon was not afraid of
strange women, and no feeling of false delicacy could prevent him from
striking an acquaintance with a woman apparently very much intoxicated.
Comrade Ossipon was interested in women. He held up this one between his
two large palms, peering at her in a business-like way till he heard her
say faintly “Mr Ossipon!” and then he very nearly let her drop to the
ground.
“Mrs Verloc!” he exclaimed. “You here!”
It seemed impossible to him that she should have been drinking. But one
never knows. He did not go into that question, but attentive not to
discourage kind fate surrendering to him the widow of Comrade Verloc, he
tried to draw her to his breast. To his astonishment she came quite
easily, and even rested on his arm for a moment before she attempted to
disengage herself. Comrade Ossipon would not be brusque with kind fate.
He withdrew his arm in a natural way.
“You recognised me,” she faltered out, standing before him, fairly steady
on her legs.
“Of course I did,” said Ossipon with perfect readiness. “I was afraid
you were going to fall. I’ve thought of you too often lately not to
recognise you anywhere, at any time. I’ve always thought of you—ever
since I first set eyes on you.”
Mrs Verloc seemed not to hear. “You were coming to the shop?” she said
nervously.
“Yes; at once,” answered Ossipon. “Directly I read the paper.”
In fact, Comrade Ossipon had been skulking for a good two hours in the
neighbourhood of Brett Street, unable to make up his mind for a bold
move. The robust anarchist was not exactly a bold conqueror. He
remembered that Mrs Verloc had never responded to his glances by the
slightest sign of encouragement. Besides, he thought the shop might be
watched by the police, and Comrade Ossipon did not wish the police to
form an exaggerated notion of his revolutionary sympathies. Even now he
did not know precisely what to do. In comparison with his usual amatory
speculations this was a big and serious undertaking. He ignored how much
there was in it and how far he would have to go in order to get hold of
what there was to get—supposing there was a chance at all. These
perplexities checking his elation imparted to his tone a soberness well
in keeping with the circumstances.
“May I ask you where you were going?” he inquired in a subdued voice.
“Don’t ask me!” cried Mrs Verloc with a shuddering, repressed violence.
All her strong vitality recoiled from the idea of death. “Never mind
where I was going. . . .”
Ossipon concluded that she was very much excited but perfectly sober.
She remained silent by his side for moment, then all at once she did
something which he did not expect. She slipped her hand under his arm.
He was startled by the act itself certainly, and quite as much too by the
palpably resolute character of this movement. But this being a delicate
affair, Comrade Ossipon behaved with delicacy. He contented himself by
pressing the hand slightly against his robust ribs. At the same time he
felt himself being impelled forward, and yielded to the impulse. At the
end of Brett Street he became aware of being directed to the left. He
submitted.
The fruiterer at the corner had put out the blazing glory of his oranges
and lemons, and Brett Place was all darkness, interspersed with the misty
halos of the few lamps defining its triangular shape, with a cluster of