The Small House at Allington
finding the money with which all the furniture was being bought.
He, with an honest but almost unintelligible zeal for the De Courcy
family, had tied up every shilling on which he could lay his hand
as belonging to Crosbie, in the interest of Lady Alexandrina.
He had gone to work for her, scraping here and arranging there,
strapping the new husband down upon the grindstone of his matrimonial
settlement, as though the future bread of his, Gazebee's, own
children were dependent on the validity of his legal workmanship.
And for this he was not to receive a penny, or gain any advantage,
immediate or ulterior. It came from his zeal,--his zeal for the
coronet which Lord De Courcy wore. According to his mind an earl and
an earl's belongings were entitled to such zeal. It was the theory
in which he had been educated, and amounted to a worship which,
unconsciously, he practised. Personally, he disliked Lord De Courcy,
who ill-treated him. He knew that the earl was a heartless, cruel,
bad man. But as an earl he was entitled to an amount of service
which no commoner could have commanded from Mr. Gazebee. Mr. Gazebee,
having thus tied up all the available funds in favour of Lady
Alexandrina's seemingly expected widowhood, was himself providing the
money with which the new house was to be furnished. "You can pay me a
hundred and fifty a year with four per cent. till it is liquidated,"
he had said to Crosbie; and Crosbie had assented with a grunt.
Hitherto, though he had lived in London expensively, and as a man
of fashion, he had never owed any one anything. He was now to begin
that career of owing. But when a clerk in a public office marries an
earl's daughter, he cannot expect to have everything his own way.
Lady Amelia had bought the ordinary furniture--the beds, the
stair-carpets, the washing-stands, and the kitchen things.
Gazebee had got a bargain of the dinner-table and sideboard. But
Lady Alexandrina herself was to come up with reference to the
appurtenances of the drawing-room. It was with reference to matters
of costume that the countess intended to lend her assistance--matters
of costume as to which the bill could not be sent in to Gazebee,
and be paid for by him with five per cent. duly charged against the
bridegroom. The bridal trousseau must be produced by De Courcy's
means, and, therefore, it was necessary that the countess herself
should come upon the scene. "I will have no bills, d'ye hear?"
snarled the earl, gnashing and snapping upon his words with one
specially ugly black tooth. "I won't have any bills about this
affair." And yet he made no offer of ready money. It was very
necessary under such circumstances that the countess herself should
come upon the scene. An ambiguous hint had been conveyed to Mr.
Gazebee, during a visit of business which he had lately made to
Courcy Castle, that the milliner's bills might as well be pinned
on to those of the furniture-makers, the crockery-mongers, and the
like. The countess, putting it in her own way, had gently suggested
that the fashion of the thing had changed lately, and that such
an arrangement was considered to be the proper thing among people
who lived really in the world. But Gazebee was a clear-headed,
honest man; and he knew the countess. He did not think that such an
arrangement could be made on the present occasion. Whereupon the
countess pushed her suggestion no further, but made up her mind that
she must come up to London herself.
It was pleasant to see the Ladies Amelia and Alexandrina, as they sat
within a vast emporium of carpets in Bond Street, asking questions of
the four men who were waiting upon them, putting their heads together
and whispering, calculating accurately as to extra twopences a yard,
and occasioning as much trouble as it was possible for them to give.
It was pleasant because they managed their large hoops cleverly among
the huge rolls of carpets, because they were enjoying themselves
thoroughly, and taking to themselves the homage of the men as clearly
their due. But it was not so pleasant to look at Crosbie, who was
fidgeting to get away to his office, to whom no power of choosing
in the matter was really given, and whom the men regarded as being
altogether supernumerary. The ladies had promised to be at the
shop by half-past ten, so that Crosbie should reach his office at
eleven--or a little after. But it was nearly eleven before they left
the Gazebee residence, and it was very evident that half-an-hour
among the carpets would be by no means sufficient. It seemed as
though miles upon miles of gorgeous colouring were unrolled before
them; and then when any pattern was regarded as at all practicable,
it was unrolled backwards and forwards till a room was nearly covered
by it. Crosbie felt for the men who were hauling about the huge heaps
of material; but Lady Amelia sat as composed as though it were her
duty to inspect every yard of stuff in the warehouse. "I think we'll
look at that one at the bottom again." Then the men went to work and
removed a mountain. "No, my dear, that green in the scroll-work won't
do. It would fly directly, if any hot water were spilt." The man
smiling ineffably, declared that that particular green never flew
anywhere. But Lady Amelia paid no attention to him, and the carpet
for which the mountain had been removed became part of another
mountain.
"That might do," said Alexandrina, gazing upon a magnificent crimson
ground through which rivers of yellow meandered, carrying with them
in their streams an infinity of blue flowers. And as she spoke she
held her head gracefully on one side, and looked down upon the carpet
doubtingly. Lady Amelia poked it with her parasol as though to test
its durability, and whispered something about yellows showing the
dirt. Crosbie took out his watch and groaned.
[ILLUSTRATION: "That might do."]
"It's a superb carpet, my lady, and about the newest thing we have.
We put down four hundred and fifty yards of it for the Duchess of
South Wales, at Cwddglwlch Castle, only last month. Nobody has had
it since, for it has not been in stock." Whereupon Lady Amelia again
poked it, and then got up and walked upon it. Lady Alexandrina held
her head a little more on one side.
"Five and three?" said Lady Amelia.
"Oh, no, my lady; five and seven; and the cheapest carpet we have
in the house. There is twopence a yard more in the colour; there is,
indeed."
"And the discount?" asked Lady Amelia.
"Two and a half, my lady."
"Oh dear, no," said Lady Amelia. "I always have five per cent. for
immediate payment--quite immediate, you know." Upon which the man
declared the question must be referred to his master. Two and a half
was the rule of the house. Crosbie, who had been looking out of the
window, said that upon his honour he couldn't wait any longer.
"And what do you think of it, Adolphus?" asked Alexandrina.
"Think of what?"
"Of the carpet--this one, you know!"
"Oh--what do I think of the carpet? I don't think I quite like all
these yellow bands; and isn't it too red? I should have thought
something brown with a small pattern would have been better. But,
upon my word, I don't much care."
"Of course he doesn't," said Lady Amelia. Then the two ladies put
their heads together for another five minutes, and the carpet was
chosen--subject to that question of the discount. "And now about the
rug," said Lady Amelia. But here Crosbie rebelled, and insisted that
he must leave them and go to his office. "You can't want me about
the rug," he said. "Well, perhaps not," said Lady Amelia. But it was
manifest that Alexandrina did not approve of being thus left by her
male attendant.
The same thing happened in Oxford Street with reference to the chairs
and sofas, and Crosbie began to wish that he were settled, even
though he should have to dress himself in the closet below the
kitchen-stairs. He was learning to hate the whole household in St.
John's Wood, and almost all that belonged to it. He was introduced
there to little family economies of which hitherto he had known
nothing, and which were disgusting to him, and the necessity for
which was especially explained to him. It was to men placed as he
was about to place himself that these economies were so vitally
essential--to men who with limited means had to maintain a decorous
outward face towards the fashionable world. Ample supplies of
butchers' meat and unlimited washing-bills might be very well upon
fifteen hundred a year to those who went out but seldom, and who
could use the first cab that came to hand when they did go out.
But there were certain things that Lady Alexandrina must do, and
therefore the strictest household economy became necessary. Would
Lily Dale have required the use of a carriage, got up to look as
though it were private, at the expense of her husband's beefsteaks
and clean shirts? That question and others of that nature were asked
by Crosbie within his own mind, not unfrequently.
But, nevertheless, he tried to love Alexandrina, or rather to
persuade himself that he loved her. If he could only get her away
from the De Courcy faction, and especially from the Gazebee branch
of it, he would break her of all that. He would teach her to sit
triumphantly in a street cab, and to cater for her table with a
plentiful hand. Teach her!--at some age over thirty; and with such
careful training as she had already received! Did he intend to forbid
her ever again to see her relations, ever to go to St. John's Wood,
or to correspond with the countess and Lady Margaretta? Teach her,
indeed! Had he yet to learn that he could not wash a blackamoor
white?--that he could not have done so even had he himself been
well adapted for the attempt, whereas he was in truth nearly as ill
adapted as a man might be? But who could pity him? Lily, whom he
might have had in his bosom, would have been no blackamoor.
Then came the time of Lady De Courcy's visit to town, and Alexandrina
moved herself off to Portman Square. There was some apparent comfort
in this to Crosbie, for he would thereby be saved from those daily
dreary journeys up to the north-west. I may say that he positively
hated that windy corner near the church, round which he had to walk
in getting to the Gazebee residence, and that he hated the lamp which
guided him to the door, and the very door itself. This door stood
buried as it were in a wall, and opened on to a narrow passage which
ran across a so-called garden, or front yard, containing on each side
two iron receptacles for geraniums, painted to look like Palissy
ware, and a naked female on a pedestal. No spot in London was, as he
thought, so cold as the bit of pavement immediately in front of that
door. And there he would be kept five, ten, fifteen minutes, as he
declared--though I believe in my heart that the time never exceeded
three,--while Richard was putting off the trappings of his work and
putting on the trappings of his grandeur.
If people would only have their doors opened to you by such
assistance as may come most easily and naturally to the work! I stood
lately for some minutes on a Tuesday afternoon at a gallant portal,
and as I waxed impatient a pretty maiden came and opened it. She
was a pretty maiden, though her hands and face and apron told tales
of the fire-grates. "Laws, sir," she said, "the visitors' day is
Wednesday; and if you would come then, there would be the man in
livery!" She took my card with the corner of her apron, and did just
as well as the man in livery; but what would have happened to her had
her little speech been overheard by her mistress?
Crosbie hated the house in St. John's Wood, and therefore the coming
of the countess was a relief to him. Portman Square was easily to be
reached, and the hospitalities of the countess would not be pressed