Ulysses
poetry is in the air the blue sea and the moon shining so beautifully
coming back on the nightboat from Tarifa the lighthouse at Europa point
the guitar that fellow played was so expressive will I ever go back
there again all new faces two glancing eyes a lattice hid Ill sing that
for him theyre my eyes if hes anything of a poet two eyes as darkly
bright as loves own star arent those beautiful words as loves young
star itll be a change the Lord knows to have an intelligent person to
talk to about yourself not always listening to him and Billy Prescotts
ad and Keyess ad and Tom the Devils ad then if anything goes wrong in
their business we have to suffer Im sure hes very distinguished Id like
to meet a man like that God not those other ruck besides hes young
those fine young men I could see down in Margate strand bathingplace
from the side of the rock standing up in the sun naked like a God or
something and then plunging into the sea with them why arent all men
like that thered be some consolation for a woman like that lovely
little statue he bought I could look at him all day long curly head and
his shoulders his finger up for you to listen theres real beauty and
poetry for you I often felt I wanted to kiss him all over also his
lovely young cock there so simple I wouldnt mind taking him in my mouth
if nobody was looking as if it was asking you to suck it so clean and
white he looks with his boyish face I would too in 1/2 a minute even if
some of it went down what its only like gruel or the dew theres no
danger besides hed be so clean compared with those pigs of men I
suppose never dream of washing it from 1 years end to the other the
most of them only thats what gives the women the moustaches Im sure
itll be grand if I can only get in with a handsome young poet at my age
Ill throw them the 1st thing in the morning till I see if the wishcard
comes out or Ill try pairing the lady herself and see if he comes out
Ill read and study all I can find or learn a bit off by heart if I knew
who he likes so he wont think me stupid if he thinks all women are the
same and I can teach him the other part Ill make him feel all over him
till he half faints under me then hell write about me lover and
mistress publicly too with our 2 photographs in all the papers when he
becomes famous O but then what am I going to do about him though
no thats no way for him has he no manners nor no refinement nor no
nothing in his nature slapping us behind like that on my bottom because
I didnt call him Hugh the ignoramus that doesnt know poetry from a
cabbage thats what you get for not keeping them in their proper place
pulling off his shoes and trousers there on the chair before me so
barefaced without even asking permission and standing out that vulgar
way in the half of a shirt they wear to be admired like a priest or a
butcher or those old hypocrites in the time of Julius Caesar of course
hes right enough in his way to pass the time as a joke sure you might
as well be in bed with what with a lion God Im sure hed have something
better to say for himself an old Lion would O well I suppose its
because they were so plump and tempting in my short petticoat he
couldnt resist they excite myself sometimes its well for men all the
amount of pleasure they get off a womans body were so round and white
for them always I wished I was one myself for a change just to try with
that thing they have swelling up on you so hard and at the same time so
soft when you touch it my uncle John has a thing long I heard those
cornerboys saying passing the comer of Marrowbone lane my aunt Mary has
a thing hairy because it was dark and they knew a girl was passing it
didnt make me blush why should it either its only nature and he puts
his thing long into my aunt Marys hairy etcetera and turns out to be
you put the handle in a sweepingbrush men again all over they can pick
and choose what they please a married woman or a fast widow or a girl
for their different tastes like those houses round behind Irish street
no but were to be always chained up theyre not going to be chaining me
up no damn fear once I start I tell you for their stupid husbands
jealousy why cant we all remain friends over it instead of quarrelling
her husband found it out what they did together well naturally and if
he did can he undo it hes coronado anyway whatever he does and then he
going to the other mad extreme about the wife in Fair Tyrants of course
the man never even casts a 2nd thought on the husband or wife either
its the woman he wants and he gets her what else were we given all
those desires for Id like to know I cant help it if Im young still can
I its a wonder Im not an old shrivelled hag before my time living with
him so cold never embracing me except sometimes when hes asleep the
wrong end of me not knowing I suppose who he has any man thatd kiss a
womans bottom Id throw my hat at him after that hed kiss anything
unnatural where we havent 1 atom of any kind of expression in us all of
us the same 2 lumps of lard before ever Id do that to a man pfooh the
dirty brutes the mere thought is enough I kiss the feet of you senorita
theres some sense in that didnt he kiss our halldoor yes he did what a
madman nobody understands his cracked ideas but me still of course a
woman wants to be embraced 20 times a day almost to make her look young
no matter by who so long as to be in love or loved by somebody if the
fellow you want isnt there sometimes by the Lord God I was thinking
would I go around by the quays there some dark evening where nobodyd
know me and pick up a sailor off the sea thatd be hot on for it and not
care a pin whose I was only do it off up in a gate somewhere or one of
those wildlooking gipsies in Rathfarnham had their camp pitched near
the Bloomfield laundry to try and steal our things if they could I only
sent mine there a few times for the name model laundry sending me back
over and over some old ones odd stockings that blackguardlooking fellow
with the fine eyes peeling a switch attack me in the dark and ride me
up against the wall without a word or a murderer anybody what they do
themselves the fine gentlemen in their silk hats that K C lives up
somewhere this way coming out of Hardwicke lane the night he gave us
the fish supper on account of winning over the boxing match of course
it was for me he gave it I knew him by his gaiters and the walk and
when I turned round a minute after just to see there was a woman after
coming out of it too some filthy prostitute then he goes home to his
wife after that only I suppose the half of those sailors are rotten
again with disease O move over your big carcass out of that for the
love of Mike listen to him the winds that waft my sighs to thee so well
he may sleep and sigh the great Suggester Don Poldo de la Flora if he
knew how he came out on the cards this morning hed have something to
sigh for a dark man in some perplexity between 2 7s too in prison for
Lord knows what he does that I dont know and Im to be slooching around
down in the kitchen to get his lordship his breakfast while hes rolled
up like a mummy will I indeed did you ever see me running Id just like
to see myself at it show them attention and they treat you like dirt I
dont care what anybody says itd be much better for the world to be
governed by the women in it you wouldnt see women going and killing one
another and slaughtering when do you ever see women rolling around
drunk like they do or gambling every penny they have and losing it on
horses yes because a woman whatever she does she knows where to stop
sure they wouldnt be in the world at all only for us they dont know
what it is to be a woman and a mother how could they where would they
all of them be if they hadnt all a mother to look after them what I
never had thats why I suppose hes running wild now out at night away
from his books and studies and not living at home on account of the
usual rowy house I suppose well its a poor case that those that have a
fine son like that theyre not satisfied and I none was he not able to
make one it wasnt my fault we came together when I was watching the two
dogs up in her behind in the middle of the naked street that
disheartened me altogether I suppose I oughtnt to have buried him in
that little woolly jacket I knitted crying as I was but give it to some
poor child but I knew well Id never have another our 1st death too it
was we were never the same since O Im not going to think myself into
the glooms about that any more I wonder why he wouldnt stay the night I
felt all the time it was somebody strange he brought in instead of
roving around the city meeting God knows who nightwalkers and
pickpockets his poor mother wouldnt like that if she was alive ruining
himself for life perhaps still its a lovely hour so silent I used to
love coming home after dances the air of the night they have friends
they can talk to weve none either he wants what he wont get or its some
woman ready to stick her knife in you I hate that in women no wonder
they treat us the way they do we are a dreadful lot of bitches I
suppose its all the troubles we have makes us so snappy Im not like
that he could easy have slept in there on the sofa in the other room I
suppose he was as shy as a boy he being so young hardly 20 of me in the
next room hed have heard me on the chamber arrah what harm Dedalus I
wonder its like those names in Gibraltar Delapaz Delagracia they had
the devils queer names there father Vilaplana of Santa Maria that gave
me the rosary Rosales y OReilly in the Calle las Siete Revueltas and
Pisimbo and Mrs Opisso in Governor street O what a name Id go and drown
myself in the first river if I had a name like her O my and all the
bits of streets Paradise ramp and Bedlam ramp and Rodgers ramp and
Crutchetts ramp and the devils gap steps well small blame to me if I am
a harumscarum I know I am a bit I declare to God I dont feel a day
older than then I wonder could I get my tongue round any of the Spanish
como esta usted muy bien gracias y usted see I havent forgotten it all
I thought I had only for the grammar a noun is the name of any person
place or thing pity I never tried to read that novel cantankerous Mrs
Rubio lent me by Valera with the questions in it all upside down the
two ways I always knew wed go away in the end I can tell him the
Spanish and he tell me the Italian then hell see Im not so ignorant
what a pity he didnt stay Im sure the poor fellow was dead tired and
wanted a good sleep badly I could have brought him in his breakfast in
bed with a bit of toast so long as I didnt do it on the knife for bad
luck or if the woman was going her rounds with the watercress and
something nice and tasty there are a few olives in the kitchen he might
like I never could bear the look of them in Abrines I could do the
criada the room looks all right since I changed it the other way you
see something was telling me all the time Id have to introduce myself
not knowing me from Adam very funny wouldnt it Im his wife or pretend
we were in Spain with him half awake without a Gods notion where he is
dos huevos estrellados senor Lord the cracked things come into my head
sometimes itd be great fun supposing he stayed with us why not theres
the room upstairs empty and Millys bed in the back room he could do his
writing and studies at the table in there for all the scribbling he
does at it and if he wants to read in bed in the morning like me as hes
making the breakfast for 1 he can make it for 2 Im sure Im not going to
take in lodgers off the street for him if he takes a gesabo of a house
like this Id love to have a long talk with an intelligent welleducated
person Id have to get a nice pair of red slippers like those Turks with
the fez used to sell or yellow and a nice semitransparent morning gown