Winnie-the-Pooh
"If we can't pull you out, Pooh, we might push you back."
Rabbit scratched his whiskers thoughtfully, and pointed out that, when
once Pooh was pushed back, he was back, and of course nobody was more
glad to see Pooh than _he_ was, still there it was, some lived in trees
and some lived underground, and----
"You mean I'd _never_ get out?" said Pooh.
"I mean," said Rabbit, "that having got _so_ far, it seems a pity to
waste it."
Christopher Robin nodded.
"Then there's only one thing to be done," he said. "We shall have to
wait for you to get thin again."
"How long does getting thin take?" asked Pooh anxiously.
"About a week, I should think."
"But I can't stay here for a _week_!"
"You can _stay_ here all right, silly old Bear. It's getting you out
which is so difficult."
"We'll read to you," said Rabbit cheerfully. "And I hope it won't snow,"
he added. "And I say, old fellow, you're taking up a good deal of room
in my house--_do_ you mind if I use your back legs as a towel-horse?
Because, I mean, there they are--doing nothing--and it would be very
convenient just to hang the towels on them."
"A week!" said Pooh gloomily. "_What about meals?_"
"I'm afraid no meals," said Christopher Robin, "because of getting thin
quicker. But we _will_ read to you."
Bear began to sigh, and then found he couldn't because he was so tightly
stuck; and a tear rolled down his eye, as he said:
"Then would you read a Sustaining Book, such as would help and comfort a
Wedged Bear in Great Tightness?"
So for a week Christopher Robin read that sort of book at the North end
of Pooh, and Rabbit hung his washing on the South end ... and in
between Bear felt himself getting slenderer and slenderer. And at the
end of the week Christopher Robin said, "_Now!_"
So he took hold of Pooh's front paws and Rabbit took hold of Christopher
Robin, and all Rabbit's friends and relations took hold of Rabbit, and
they all pulled together....
And for a long time Pooh only said "_Ow!_" ...
And "_Oh!_" ...
And then, all of a sudden, he said "_Pop!_" just as if a cork were
coming out of a bottle.
And Christopher Robin and Rabbit and all Rabbit's friends and relations
went head-over-heels backwards ... and on the top of them came
Winnie-the-Pooh--free!
So, with a nod of thanks to his friends, he went on with his walk
through the forest, humming proudly to himself. But, Christopher Robin
looked after him lovingly, and said to himself, "Silly old Bear!"
CHAPTER III
IN WHICH POOH AND PIGLET GO HUNTING
AND NEARLY CATCH A WOOZLE
The Piglet lived in a very grand house in the middle of a beech-tree,
and the beech-tree was in the middle of the forest, and the Piglet lived
in the middle of the house. Next to his house was a piece of broken
board which had: "TRESPASSERS W" on it. When Christopher Robin asked the
Piglet what it meant, he said it was his grandfather's name, and had
been in the family for a long time, Christopher Robin said you
_couldn't_ be called Trespassers W, and Piglet said yes, you could,
because his grandfather was, and it was short for Trespassers Will,
which was short for Trespassers William. And his grandfather had had two
names in case he lost one--Trespassers after an uncle, and William after
Trespassers.
"I've got two names," said Christopher Robin carelessly.
"Well, there you are, that proves it," said Piglet.
One fine winter's day when Piglet was brushing away the snow in front of
his house, he happened to look up, and there was Winnie-the-Pooh. Pooh
was walking round and round in a circle, thinking of something else, and
when Piglet called to him, he just went on walking.
"Hallo!" said Piglet, "what are _you_ doing?"
"Hunting," said Pooh.
"Hunting what?"
"Tracking something," said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously.
"Tracking what?" said Piglet, coming closer.
"That's just what I ask myself. I ask myself, What?"
"What do you think you'll answer?"
"I shall have to wait until I catch up with it," said Winnie-the-Pooh.
"Now, look there." He pointed to the ground in front of him. "What do
you see there?"
"Tracks," said Piglet. "Paw-marks." He gave a little squeak of
excitement. "Oh, Pooh! Do you think it's a--a--a Woozle?"
"It may be," said Pooh. "Sometimes it is, and sometimes it isn't. You
never can tell with paw-marks."
With these few words he went on tracking, and Piglet, after watching him
for a minute or two, ran after him. Winnie-the-Pooh had come to a sudden
stop, and was bending over the tracks in a puzzled sort of way.
"What's the matter?" asked Piglet.
"It's a very funny thing," said Bear, "but there seem to be
_two_ animals now. This--whatever-it-was--has been joined by
another--whatever-it-is--and the two of them are now proceeding
in company. Would you mind coming with me, Piglet, in case they
turn out to be Hostile Animals?"
Piglet scratched his ear in a nice sort of way, and said that he had
nothing to do until Friday, and would be delighted to come, in case it
really _was_ a Woozle.
"You mean, in case it really is two Woozles," said Winnie-the-Pooh, and
Piglet said that anyhow he had nothing to do until Friday. So off they
went together.
There was a small spinney of larch trees just here, and it seemed as if
the two Woozles, if that is what they were, had been going round this
spinney; so round this spinney went Pooh and Piglet after them; Piglet
passing the time by telling Pooh what his Grandfather Trespassers W had
done to Remove Stiffness after Tracking, and how his Grandfather
Trespassers W had suffered in his later years from Shortness of Breath,
and other matters of interest, and Pooh wondering what a Grandfather was
like, and if perhaps this was Two Grandfathers they were after now, and,
if so, whether he would be allowed to take one home and keep it, and
what Christopher Robin would say. And still the tracks went on in front
of them....
Suddenly Winnie-the-Pooh stopped, and pointed excitedly in front of him.
"_Look!_"
"_What?_" said Piglet, with a jump. And then, to show that he hadn't
been frightened, he jumped up and down once or twice more in an
exercising sort of way.
"The tracks!" said Pooh. "_A third animal has joined the other two!_"
"Pooh!" cried Piglet. "Do you think it is another Woozle?"
"No," said Pooh, "because it makes different marks. It is either Two
Woozles and one, as it might be, Wizzle, or Two, as it might be, Wizzles
and one, if so it is, Woozle. Let us continue to follow them."
So they went on, feeling just a little anxious now, in case the three
animals in front of them were of Hostile Intent. And Piglet wished very
much that his Grandfather T. W. were there, instead of elsewhere, and
Pooh thought how nice it would be if they met Christopher Robin suddenly
but quite accidentally, and only because he liked Christopher Robin so
much. And then, all of a sudden, Winnie-the-Pooh stopped again, and
licked the tip of his nose in a cooling manner, for he was feeling more
hot and anxious than ever in his life before. _There were four animals
in front of them!_
"Do you see, Piglet? Look at their tracks! Three, as it were, Woozles,
and one, as it was, Wizzle. _Another Woozle has joined them!_"
And so it seemed to be. There were the tracks; crossing over each other
here, getting muddled up with each other there; but, quite plainly every
now and then, the tracks of four sets of paws.
"I _think_," said Piglet, when he had licked the tip of his nose too,
and found that it brought very little comfort, "I _think_ that I have
just remembered something. I have just remembered something that I
forgot to do yesterday and shan't be able to do to-morrow. So I suppose
I really ought to go back and do it now."
"We'll do it this afternoon, and I'll come with you," said Pooh.
"It isn't the sort of thing you can do in the afternoon," said Piglet
quickly. "It's a very particular morning thing, that has to be done in
the morning, and, if possible, between the hours of----What would you
say the time was?"
"About twelve," said Winnie-the-Pooh, looking at the sun.
"Between, as I was saying, the hours of twelve and twelve five. So,
really, dear old Pooh, if you'll excuse me----_What's that?_"
Pooh looked up at the sky, and then, as he heard the whistle again, he
looked up into the branches of a big oak-tree, and then he saw a friend
of his.
"It's Christopher Robin," he said.
"Ah, then you'll be all right," said Piglet. "You'll be quite safe with
_him_. Good-bye," and he trotted off home as quickly as he could, very
glad to be Out of All Danger again.
Christopher Robin came slowly down his tree.
"Silly old Bear," he said, "what _were_ you doing? First you went round
the spinney twice by yourself, and then Piglet ran after you and you
went round again together, and then you were just going round a fourth
time----"
"Wait a moment," said Winnie-the-Pooh, holding up his paw.
He sat down and thought, in the most thoughtful way he could think. Then
he fitted his paw into one of the Tracks ... and then he scratched his
nose twice, and stood up.
"Yes," said Winnie-the-Pooh.
"I see now," said Winnie-the-Pooh.
"I have been Foolish and Deluded," said he, "and I am a Bear of No Brain
at All."
"You're the Best Bear in All the World," said Christopher Robin
soothingly.
"Am I?" said Pooh hopefully. And then he brightened up suddenly.
"Anyhow," he said, "it is nearly Luncheon Time."
So he went home for it.
CHAPTER IV
IN WHICH EEYORE LOSES A TAIL
AND POOH FINDS ONE
The Old Grey Donkey, Eeyore, stood by himself in a thistly corner of
the forest, his front feet well apart, his head on one side, and thought
about things. Sometimes he thought sadly to himself, "Why?" and
sometimes he thought, "Wherefore?" and sometimes he thought, "Inasmuch
as which?"--and sometimes he didn't quite know what he _was_ thinking
about. So when Winnie-the-Pooh came stumping along, Eeyore was very glad
to be able to stop thinking for a little, in order to say "How do you
do?" in a gloomy manner to him.
"And how are you?" said Winnie-the-Pooh.
Eeyore shook his head from side to side.
"Not very how," he said. "I don't seem to have felt at all how for a
long time."
"Dear, dear," said Pooh, "I'm sorry about that. Let's have a look at
you."
So Eeyore stood there, gazing sadly at the ground, and Winnie-the-Pooh
walked all round him once.
"Why, what's happened to your tail?" he said in surprise.
"What _has_ happened to it?" said Eeyore.
"It isn't there!"
"Are you sure?"
"Well, either a tail _is_ there or it isn't there. You can't make a
mistake about it. And yours _isn't_ there!"
"Then what is?"
"Nothing."
"Let's have a look," said Eeyore, and he turned slowly round to the
place where his tail had been a little while ago, and then, finding that
he couldn't catch it up, he turned round the other way, until he came
back to where he was at first, and then he put his head down and looked
between his front legs, and at last he said, with a long, sad sigh, "I
believe you're right."
"Of course I'm right," said Pooh.
"That Accounts for a Good Deal," said Eeyore gloomily. "It Explains
Everything. No Wonder."
"You must have left it somewhere," said Winnie-the-Pooh.
"Somebody must have taken it," said Eeyore. "How Like Them," he added,
after a long silence.
Pooh felt that he ought to say something helpful about it, but didn't
quite know what. So he decided to do something helpful instead.
"Eeyore," he said solemnly, "I, Winnie-the-Pooh, will find your tail for
you."