Crime and Punishment
forgive myself for not asking her to. I ran away in a fright, and,
besides, the bell rang. I was sitting to-day, feeling very heavy after a
miserable dinner from a cookshop; I was sitting smoking, all of a sudden
Marfa Petrovna again. She came in very smart in a new green silk dress
with a long train. ‘Good day, Arkady Ivanovitch! How do you like my
dress? Aniska can’t make like this.’ (Aniska was a dressmaker in the
country, one of our former serf girls who had been trained in Moscow, a
pretty wench.) She stood turning round before me. I looked at the dress,
and then I looked carefully, very carefully, at her face. ‘I wonder
you trouble to come to me about such trifles, Marfa Petrovna.’ ‘Good
gracious, you won’t let one disturb you about anything!’ To tease her
I said, ‘I want to get married, Marfa Petrovna.’ ‘That’s just like you,
Arkady Ivanovitch; it does you very little credit to come looking for a
bride when you’ve hardly buried your wife. And if you could make a good
choice, at least, but I know it won’t be for your happiness or hers, you
will only be a laughing-stock to all good people.’ Then she went out and
her train seemed to rustle. Isn’t it nonsense, eh?”
“But perhaps you are telling lies?” Raskolnikov put in.
“I rarely lie,” answered Svidrigaïlov thoughtfully, apparently not
noticing the rudeness of the question.
“And in the past, have you ever seen ghosts before?”
“Y-yes, I have seen them, but only once in my life, six years ago. I had
a serf, Filka; just after his burial I called out forgetting ‘Filka, my
pipe!’ He came in and went to the cupboard where my pipes were. I sat
still and thought ‘he is doing it out of revenge,’ because we had a
violent quarrel just before his death. ‘How dare you come in with a hole
in your elbow?’ I said. ‘Go away, you scamp!’ He turned and went out,
and never came again. I didn’t tell Marfa Petrovna at the time. I wanted
to have a service sung for him, but I was ashamed.”
“You should go to a doctor.”
“I know I am not well, without your telling me, though I don’t know
what’s wrong; I believe I am five times as strong as you are. I didn’t
ask you whether you believe that ghosts are seen, but whether you
believe that they exist.”
“No, I won’t believe it!” Raskolnikov cried, with positive anger.
“What do people generally say?” muttered Svidrigaïlov, as though
speaking to himself, looking aside and bowing his head. “They say, ‘You
are ill, so what appears to you is only unreal fantasy.’ But that’s not
strictly logical. I agree that ghosts only appear to the sick, but that
only proves that they are unable to appear except to the sick, not that
they don’t exist.”
“Nothing of the sort,” Raskolnikov insisted irritably.
“No? You don’t think so?” Svidrigaïlov went on, looking at him
deliberately. “But what do you say to this argument (help me with
it): ghosts are, as it were, shreds and fragments of other worlds, the
beginning of them. A man in health has, of course, no reason to see
them, because he is above all a man of this earth and is bound for the
sake of completeness and order to live only in this life. But as soon
as one is ill, as soon as the normal earthly order of the organism is
broken, one begins to realise the possibility of another world; and the
more seriously ill one is, the closer becomes one’s contact with that
other world, so that as soon as the man dies he steps straight into that
world. I thought of that long ago. If you believe in a future life, you
could believe in that, too.”
“I don’t believe in a future life,” said Raskolnikov.
Svidrigaïlov sat lost in thought.
“And what if there are only spiders there, or something of that sort,”
he said suddenly.
“He is a madman,” thought Raskolnikov.
“We always imagine eternity as something beyond our conception,
something vast, vast! But why must it be vast? Instead of all that, what
if it’s one little room, like a bath house in the country, black
and grimy and spiders in every corner, and that’s all eternity is? I
sometimes fancy it like that.”
“Can it be you can imagine nothing juster and more comforting than
that?” Raskolnikov cried, with a feeling of anguish.
“Juster? And how can we tell, perhaps that is just, and do you know
it’s what I would certainly have made it,” answered Svidrigaïlov, with a
vague smile.
This horrible answer sent a cold chill through Raskolnikov. Svidrigaïlov
raised his head, looked at him, and suddenly began laughing.
“Only think,” he cried, “half an hour ago we had never seen each other,
we regarded each other as enemies; there is a matter unsettled between
us; we’ve thrown it aside, and away we’ve gone into the abstract! Wasn’t
I right in saying that we were birds of a feather?”
“Kindly allow me,” Raskolnikov went on irritably, “to ask you to explain
why you have honoured me with your visit... and... and I am in a hurry,
I have no time to waste. I want to go out.”
“By all means, by all means. Your sister, Avdotya Romanovna, is going to
be married to Mr. Luzhin, Pyotr Petrovitch?”
“Can you refrain from any question about my sister and from mentioning
her name? I can’t understand how you dare utter her name in my presence,
if you really are Svidrigaïlov.”
“Why, but I’ve come here to speak about her; how can I avoid mentioning
her?”
“Very good, speak, but make haste.”
“I am sure that you must have formed your own opinion of this Mr.
Luzhin, who is a connection of mine through my wife, if you have only
seen him for half an hour, or heard any facts about him. He is no
match for Avdotya Romanovna. I believe Avdotya Romanovna is sacrificing
herself generously and imprudently for the sake of... for the sake of
her family. I fancied from all I had heard of you that you would be very
glad if the match could be broken off without the sacrifice of worldly
advantages. Now I know you personally, I am convinced of it.”
“All this is very naïve... excuse me, I should have said impudent on
your part,” said Raskolnikov.
“You mean to say that I am seeking my own ends. Don’t be uneasy, Rodion
Romanovitch, if I were working for my own advantage, I would not have
spoken out so directly. I am not quite a fool. I will confess something
psychologically curious about that: just now, defending my love for
Avdotya Romanovna, I said I was myself the victim. Well, let me tell you
that I’ve no feeling of love now, not the slightest, so that I wonder
myself indeed, for I really did feel something...”
“Through idleness and depravity,” Raskolnikov put in.
“I certainly am idle and depraved, but your sister has such qualities
that even I could not help being impressed by them. But that’s all
nonsense, as I see myself now.”
“Have you seen that long?”
“I began to be aware of it before, but was only perfectly sure of it the
day before yesterday, almost at the moment I arrived in Petersburg. I
still fancied in Moscow, though, that I was coming to try to get Avdotya
Romanovna’s hand and to cut out Mr. Luzhin.”
“Excuse me for interrupting you; kindly be brief, and come to the object
of your visit. I am in a hurry, I want to go out...”
“With the greatest pleasure. On arriving here and determining on a
certain... journey, I should like to make some necessary preliminary
arrangements. I left my children with an aunt; they are well provided
for; and they have no need of me personally. And a nice father I should
make, too! I have taken nothing but what Marfa Petrovna gave me a year
ago. That’s enough for me. Excuse me, I am just coming to the point.
Before the journey which may come off, I want to settle Mr. Luzhin, too.
It’s not that I detest him so much, but it was through him I quarrelled
with Marfa Petrovna when I learned that she had dished up this marriage.
I want now to see Avdotya Romanovna through your mediation, and if you
like in your presence, to explain to her that in the first place she
will never gain anything but harm from Mr. Luzhin. Then, begging
her pardon for all past unpleasantness, to make her a present of ten
thousand roubles and so assist the rupture with Mr. Luzhin, a rupture to
which I believe she is herself not disinclined, if she could see the way
to it.”
“You are certainly mad,” cried Raskolnikov not so much angered as
astonished. “How dare you talk like that!”
“I knew you would scream at me; but in the first place, though I am not
rich, this ten thousand roubles is perfectly free; I have absolutely no
need for it. If Avdotya Romanovna does not accept it, I shall waste
it in some more foolish way. That’s the first thing. Secondly, my
conscience is perfectly easy; I make the offer with no ulterior motive.
You may not believe it, but in the end Avdotya Romanovna and you will
know. The point is, that I did actually cause your sister, whom I
greatly respect, some trouble and unpleasantness, and so, sincerely
regretting it, I want--not to compensate, not to repay her for the
unpleasantness, but simply to do something to her advantage, to show
that I am not, after all, privileged to do nothing but harm. If there
were a millionth fraction of self-interest in my offer, I should not
have made it so openly; and I should not have offered her ten thousand
only, when five weeks ago I offered her more, Besides, I may, perhaps,
very soon marry a young lady, and that alone ought to prevent suspicion
of any design on Avdotya Romanovna. In conclusion, let me say that
in marrying Mr. Luzhin, she is taking money just the same, only from
another man. Don’t be angry, Rodion Romanovitch, think it over coolly
and quietly.”
Svidrigaïlov himself was exceedingly cool and quiet as he was saying
this.
“I beg you to say no more,” said Raskolnikov. “In any case this is
unpardonable impertinence.”
“Not in the least. Then a man may do nothing but harm to his neighbour
in this world, and is prevented from doing the tiniest bit of good
by trivial conventional formalities. That’s absurd. If I died, for
instance, and left that sum to your sister in my will, surely she
wouldn’t refuse it?”
“Very likely she would.”
“Oh, no, indeed. However, if you refuse it, so be it, though ten
thousand roubles is a capital thing to have on occasion. In any case I
beg you to repeat what I have said to Avdotya Romanovna.”
“No, I won’t.”
“In that case, Rodion Romanovitch, I shall be obliged to try and see her
myself and worry her by doing so.”
“And if I do tell her, will you not try to see her?”
“I don’t know really what to say. I should like very much to see her
once more.”
“Don’t hope for it.”
“I’m sorry. But you don’t know me. Perhaps we may become better
friends.”
“You think we may become friends?”
“And why not?” Svidrigaïlov said, smiling. He stood up and took his hat.
“I didn’t quite intend to disturb you and I came here without reckoning
on it... though I was very much struck by your face this morning.”
“Where did you see me this morning?” Raskolnikov asked uneasily.
“I saw you by chance.... I kept fancying there is something about you
like me.... But don’t be uneasy. I am not intrusive; I used to get on
all right with card-sharpers, and I never bored Prince Svirbey, a great
personage who is a distant relation of mine, and I could write about
Raphael’s _Madonna_ in Madam Prilukov’s album, and I never left Marfa
Petrovna’s side for seven years, and I used to stay the night at
Viazemsky’s house in the Hay Market in the old days, and I may go up in
a balloon with Berg, perhaps.”
“Oh, all right. Are you starting soon on your travels, may I ask?”
“What travels?”
“Why, on that ‘journey’; you spoke of it yourself.”
“A journey? Oh, yes. I did speak of a journey. Well, that’s a wide
subject.... if only you knew what you are asking,” he added, and gave
a sudden, loud, short laugh. “Perhaps I’ll get married instead of the