Selections from the Writings of Kierkegaard
reason I agree with Cicero when he asserts that the son is always in the
wrong as against his father; and it is precisely filial piety which
teaches me to believe this, teaches me not even to penetrate the hidden,
but rather to remain hidden in the father. Quite true, I am glad to be
another person's greatest debtor; but as to the opposite, viz., before
deciding to make another person my greatest debtor, I want to arrive
at greater clarity. For to my conception there is a world of difference
between being some person's debtor, and making some person one's
debtor to such an extent that he will never be able to clear himself.
What filial piety forbids the son to consider, love bids the father
to consider. And here contradiction sets in again. If the son has an
immortal soul like his father, what does it mean, then, to be a father?
For must I not smile at myself when thinking of myself as a
father--whereas the son is most deeply moved when he reflects on
the relation he bears to his father? Very well do I understand Plato
when he says that an animal will give birth to an animal of the same
species, a plant, to a plant of the same species, and thus also man
to man.[22] But this explains nothing, does not satisfy one's thought,
and arouses but a dim feeling; for an immortal soul cannot be born.
Whenever, then, a father considers his son in the light of his son's
immortality--which is, indeed, the essential consideration[23]--he
will probably smile at himself, for he cannot, by any means, grasp in
their entirety all the beautiful and noble thoughts which his son with
filial piety entertains about him. If, on the other hand, he considers
his son from the point of view of his animal nature he must smile again,
because the conception of fatherhood is too exalted an expression
for it.
Finally, if it were thinkable that a father influenced his son in
such fashion that his own nature was a condition from which the
son's nature could not free itself, then the contradiction would arise
in another direction; for in this case nothing more terrible is
thinkable than being a father. There is no comparison between killing
a person and giving him life--the former decides his fate only in
time, the other for all eternity. So there is a contradiction again, and
one both to laugh and to weep about. Is paternity then an
illusion--even if not in the same sense as is implied in Magdelone's
speech to Jeronymus[24]--or is it the most terrible thought imaginable?
Is it the greatest benefit conferred on one, or is it the sweetest
gratification of one's desire--is it something which just happens,
or is it the greatest task of life?
Look you, for this reason have I forsworn all love, for my thought
is to me the most essential consideration. So even if love be the most
exquisite joy, I renounce it, without wishing either to offend or to
envy any one; and even if love be the condition for conferring the
greatest benefit imaginable I deny myself the opportunity therefor--but
my thought I have not prostituted. By no means do I lack an eye for
what is beautiful, by no means does my heart remain unmoved when I
read the songs of the poets, by no means is my soul without sadness
when it yields to the beautiful conception of love; but I do not wish
to become unfaithful to my thought. And of what avail were it to be,
for there is no happiness possible for me except my thought have
free sway. If it had not, I would in desperation yearn for my
thought, which I may not desert to cleave to a wife, for it is my
immortal part and, hence, of more importance than a wife. Well do I
comprehend that if any thing is sacred it is love; that if faithlessness
in any relation is base, it is doubly so in love; that if any deceit
is detestable, it is tenfold more detestable in love. But my soul is
innocent of blame. I have never looked at any woman to desire her,
neither have I fluttered about aimlessly before blindly plunging, or
lapsing, into the most decisive of all relations. If I knew what the
lovable were I would know with certainty whether I had offended by
tempting any one; but since I do not know, I am certain only of
never having had the conscious desire to do so.
Supposing I should yield to love and be made to laugh; or supposing
I should be cast down by terror, since I cannot find the narrow path
which lovers travel as easily as if it were the broad highway,
undisturbed by any doubts, which they surely have bestowed thought on
(seeing our times have, indeed, reflected about all[25] and consequently
will comprehend me when I assert that to act unreflectingly is nonsense,
as one ought to have gone through all possible reflections before
acting)--supposing, I say, I should yield to love! Would I not
insult past redress my beloved one if I laughed; or irrevocably plunge
her into despair if I were overwhelmed by terror? For I understand
well enough that a woman cannot be expected to have thought as
profoundly about these matters; and a woman who found love comical
(as but gods and men can, for which reason woman is a temptation
luring them to become ridiculous) would both betray a suspicious
amount of previous experience and understand me least. But a woman
who comprehended the terror of love would have lost her loveliness
and still fail to understand me--she would be annihilated; which
is in nowise my case, so long as my thought saves me.
Is there no one ready to laugh? When I began by wanting to speak
about the comical element in love you perhaps expected to be made to
laugh, for it is easy to make you laugh, and I myself am a friend of
laughter; and still you did not laugh, I believe. The effect of my
speech was a different one, and yet precisely this proves that I have
spoken about the comical. If there be no one who laughs at my
speech--well, then laugh a little at me, dear fellow-banqueters,
and I shall not wonder; for I do not understand what I have occasionally
heard you say about love. Very probably, though, you are among the
initiated as I am not.
Thereupon the Young Person seated himself. He had become more
beautiful, almost, than before the meal. Now he sat quietly, looking
down before him, unconcerned about the others. John the Seducer
desired at once to urge some objections against the Young Person's
speech but was interrupted by Constantin who warned against discussions
and ruled that on this occasion only speeches were in order. John said
if that was the case, he would stipulate that he should be allowed to be
the last speaker. This again gave rise to a discussion as to the order
in which they were to speak, which Constantin closed by offering to
speak forthwith, against their recognizing his authority to appoint the
speakers in their turn.
(Constantin's Speech)
Constantin spoke as follows:
There is a time to keep silence, and a time to speak,[26] and
now it seems to be the time to speak briefly, for our young friend
has spoken much and very strangely. His _vis comica_[27] has made
us struggle _ancipiti proelio_[28] because his speech was full of
doubts, as he himself is, sitting there now--a perplexed man who
knows not whether to laugh, or weep, or fall in love. In fact, had
I had foreknowledge of his speech, such as he demands one should
have of love, I should have forbidden him to speak; but now it is
too late. I shall bid you then, dear bellow-banqueters, "gladsome and
merry to be," and even if I cannot enforce this I shall ask you to forget
each speech so soon as it is made and to wash it down with a single
draught.
And now as to woman, about whom I shall speak. I too have pondered
about her, and I have finally discovered the category to which she
belongs. I too have sought, but I have found, too, and I have made a
matchless discovery which I shall now communicate to you. Woman is
understood correctly only when placed in the category of "the joke."
It is man's function to be absolute, to act in an absolute fashion,
or to give expression to the absolute. Woman's sphere lies in her
relativity.[29] Between beings so radically different, no true
reciprocal relation can exist. Precisely in this incommensurability
lies the joke. And with woman the joke was born into the world. It
is to be understood, however, that man must know how to stick to
his role of being absolute; for else nothing is seen--that is to
say, something exceedingly common is seen, viz., that man and woman
fit each other, he as a half man and she as a half man.
The joke is not an æsthetic, but an abortive ethical, category. Its
effect on thought is about the same as the impression we receive if a
man were solemnly to begin making a speech, recite a comma or two
with his pronouncement, then say "hm!"--"dash"--and then stop.
Thus with woman. One tries to cover her with the ethical category,
one thinks of human nature, one opens one's eyes, one fastens one's
glances on the most excellent maiden in question, an effort is
made to redeem the claims of the ethical demand; and then one
grows ill at ease and says to one's self: ah, this is undoubtedly
a joke! The joke lies, indeed, in applying that category to her
and measuring her by it, because it would be idle to expect serious
results from her; but just that is the joke. Because if one could
demand it of her it would not be a joke at all. A mighty poor joke
indeed it would be, to place her under the air-pump and draw the air out
of her--indeed it were a shame; but to blow her up to supernatural
size and let her imagine herself to have attained all the ideality which
a little maiden of sixteen imagines she has, that is the beginning of
the game and, indeed, the beginning of a highly entertaining performance.
No youth has half so much imaginary ideality as a young girl, but: "We
shall soon be even" as says the tailor in the proverb; for her ideality
is but an illusion.
If one fails to consider woman from this point of view she may cause
irreparable harm; but through my conception of her she becomes harmless
and amusing. For a man there is nothing more shocking than to catch
himself twaddling. It destroys all true ideality; for one may repent of
having been a rascal, and one may feel sorry for not having meant
a word of what one said; but to have talked nonsense, sheer nonsense,
to have meant all one said and behold! it was all nonsense--that
is too disgusting for repentance incarnate to put up with. But this is
not the case with woman. She has a prescriptive right to transfigure
herself--in less than 24 hours--in the most innocent and pardonable
nonsense; for far is it from her ingenuous soul to wish to deceive
one! Indeed, she meant all she said, and now she says the precise
opposite, but with the same amiable frankness, for now she is
willing to stake everything on what she said last. Now in case a man
in all seriousness surrenders to love he may be called fortunate indeed
if he succeeds in obtaining an insurance--if, indeed, he is able to
obtain it anywhere; for so inflammable a material as woman is most
likely to arouse the suspicions of an insurance agent. Just consider
for a moment what he has done in thus identifying himself with her!
If, some fine New Year's night she goes off like some fireworks he
will promptly follow suit; and even if this should not happen he
will have many a close call. And what may he not lose! He may lose
his all; for there is but one absolute antithesis to the absolute,
and that is nonsense. Therefore, let him not seek refuge in some
society for morally tainted individuals, for he is not morally
tainted--far from it; only, he has been reduced _in absurdum_
and beatified in nonsense; that is, has been made a fool of.
This will never happen among men. If a man should sputter off in
this fashion I would scorn him. If he should fool me by his cleverness