The Gambler
I must confess that this puerile explanation gave me great pleasure. I
felt a strong desire to overlay the incident with an even added measure
of grossness; so, the further I proceeded, the more did the gusto of my
proceeding increase.
“You are only making fun of me!” vociferated the General as, turning to
the Frenchman, he declared that my bringing about of the incident had
been gratuitous. De Griers smiled contemptuously, and shrugged his
shoulders.
“Do not think _that_,” I put in. “It was not so at all. I grant you
that my behaviour was bad—I fully confess that it was so, and make no
secret of the fact. I would even go so far as to grant you that my
behaviour might well be called stupid and indecent tomfoolery; but,
_more_ than that it was not. Also, let me tell you that I am very sorry
for my conduct. Yet there is one circumstance which, in my eyes, almost
absolves me from regret in the matter. Of late—that is to say, for the
last two or three weeks—I have been feeling not at all well. That is to
say, I have been in a sick, nervous, irritable, fanciful condition, so
that I have periodically lost control over myself. For instance, on
more than one occasion I have tried to pick a quarrel even with
Monsieur le Marquise here; and, under the circumstances, he had no
choice but to answer me. In short, I have recently been showing signs
of ill-health. Whether the Baroness Burmergelm will take this
circumstance into consideration when I come to beg her pardon (for I
_do_ intend to make her amends) I do not know; but I doubt if she will,
and the less so since, so far as I know, the circumstance is one which,
of late, has begun to be abused in the legal world, in that advocates
in criminal cases have taken to justifying their clients on the ground
that, at the moment of the crime, they (the clients) were unconscious
of what they were doing—that, in short, they were out of health. ‘My
client committed the murder—that is true; but he has no recollection of
having committed it.’ And doctors actually support these advocates by
affirming that there really is such a malady—that there really _can_
arise temporary delusions which make a man remember nothing of a given
deed, or only a half or a quarter of it! But the Baron and Baroness are
members of an older generation, as well as Prussian Junkers and
landowners. To them such a process in the medico-judicial world will be
unknown, and therefore, they are the more unlikely to accept any such
explanation. What is _your_ opinion about it, General?”
“Enough, sir!” he thundered with barely restrained fury. “Enough, I
say! Once and for all I must endeavour to rid myself of you and your
impertinence. To justify yourself in the eyes of the Baron and Baroness
will be impossible. Any intercourse with you, even though it be
confined to a begging of their pardons, they would look upon as a
degradation. I may tell you that, on learning that you formed part of
my household, the Baron approached me in the Casino, and demanded of me
additional satisfaction. Do you understand, then, what it is that you
have entailed upon me—upon _me_, my good sir? You have entailed upon me
the fact of my being forced to sue humbly to the Baron, and to give him
my word of honour that this very day you shall cease to belong to my
establishment!”
“Excuse me, General,” I interrupted, “but did he make an express point
of it that I should ‘cease to belong to your establishment,’ as you
call it?”
“No; I, of my own initiative, thought that I ought to afford him that
satisfaction; and, with it he was satisfied. So we must part, good sir.
It is my duty to hand over to you forty gülden, three florins, as per
the accompanying statement. Here is the money, and here the account,
which you are at liberty to verify. Farewell. From henceforth we are
strangers. From you I have never had anything but trouble and
unpleasantness. I am about to call the landlord, and explain to him
that from tomorrow onwards I shall no longer be responsible for your
hotel expenses. Also I have the honour to remain your obedient
servant.”
I took the money and the account (which was indicted in pencil), and,
bowing low to the General, said to him very gravely:
“The matter cannot end here. I regret very much that you should have
been put to unpleasantness at the Baron’s hands; but, the fault (pardon
me) is your own. How came you to answer for me to the Baron? And what
did you mean by saying that I formed part of your household? I am
merely your family tutor—not a son of yours, nor yet your ward, nor a
person of any kind for whose acts you need be responsible. I am a
judicially competent person, a man of twenty-five years of age, a
university graduate, a gentleman, and, until I met yourself, a complete
stranger to you. Only my boundless respect for your merits restrains me
from demanding satisfaction at your hands, as well as a further
explanation as to the reasons which have led you to take it upon
yourself to answer for my conduct.”
So struck was he with my words that, spreading out his hands, he turned
to the Frenchman, and interpreted to him that I had challenged himself
(the General) to a duel. The Frenchman laughed aloud.
“Nor do I intend to let the Baron off,” I continued calmly, but with
not a little discomfiture at De Griers’ merriment. “And since you,
General, have today been so good as to listen to the Baron’s
complaints, and to enter into his concerns—since you have made yourself
a participator in the affair—I have the honour to inform you that,
tomorrow morning at the latest, I shall, in my own name, demand of the
said Baron a formal explanation as to the reasons which have led him to
disregard the fact that the matter lies between him and myself alone,
and to put a slight upon me by referring it to another person, as
though I were unworthy to answer for my own conduct.”
Then there happened what I had foreseen. The General on hearing of this
further intended outrage, showed the white feather.
“What?” he cried. “Do you intend to go on with this damned nonsense? Do
you not realise the harm that it is doing me? I beg of you not to laugh
at me, sir—not to laugh at me, for we have police authorities here who,
out of respect for my rank, and for that of the Baron... In short, sir,
I swear to you that I will have you arrested, and marched out of the
place, to prevent any further brawling on your part. Do you understand
what I say?” He was almost breathless with anger, as well as in a
terrible fright.
“General,” I replied with that calmness which he never could abide,
“one cannot arrest a man for brawling until he has brawled. I have not
so much as begun my explanations to the Baron, and you are altogether
ignorant as to the form and time which my intended procedure is likely
to assume. I wish but to disabuse the Baron of what is, to me, a
shameful supposition—namely, that I am under the guardianship of a
person who is qualified to exercise control over my free will. It is
vain for you to disturb and alarm yourself.”
“For God’s sake, Alexis Ivanovitch, do put an end to this senseless
scheme of yours!” he muttered, but with a sudden change from a
truculent tone to one of entreaty as he caught me by the hand. “Do you
know what is likely to come of it? Merely further unpleasantness. You
will agree with me, I am sure, that at present I ought to move with
especial care—yes, with very especial care. You cannot be fully aware
of how I am situated. When we leave this place I shall be ready to
receive you back into my household; but, for the time being I— Well, I
cannot tell you all my reasons.” With that he wound up in a despairing
voice: “O Alexis Ivanovitch, Alexis Ivanovitch!”
I moved towards the door—begging him to be calm, and promising that
everything should be done decently and in order; whereafter I departed.
Russians, when abroad, are over-apt to play the poltroon, to watch all
their words, and to wonder what people are thinking of their conduct,
or whether such and such a thing is _comme il faut_. In short, they are
over-apt to cosset themselves, and to lay claim to great importance.
Always they prefer the form of behaviour which has once and for all
become accepted and established. This they will follow slavishly
whether in hotels, on promenades, at meetings, or when on a journey.
But the General had avowed to me that, over and above such
considerations as these, there were circumstances which compelled him
to “move with especial care at present”, and that the fact had actually
made him poor-spirited and a coward—it had made him altogether change
his tone towards me. This fact I took into my calculations, and duly
noted it, for, of course, he _might_ apply to the authorities tomorrow,
and it behoved me to go carefully.
Yet it was not the General but Polina that I wanted to anger. She had
treated me with such cruelty, and had got me into such a hole, that I
felt a longing to force her to beseech me to stop. Of course, my
tomfoolery might compromise her; yet certain other feelings and desires
had begun to form themselves in my brain. If I was never to rank in her
eyes as anything but a nonentity, it would not greatly matter if I
figured as a draggle-tailed cockerel, and the Baron were to give me a
good thrashing; but, the fact was that I desired to have the laugh of
them all, and to come out myself unscathed. Let people see what they
_would_ see. Let Polina, for once, have a good fright, and be forced to
whistle me to heel again. But, however much she might whistle, she
should see that I was at least no draggle-tailed cockerel!
I have just received a surprising piece of news. I have just met our
chambermaid on the stairs, and been informed by her that Maria
Philipovna departed today, by the night train, to stay with a cousin at
Carlsbad. What can that mean? The maid declares that Madame packed her
trunks early in the day. Yet how is it that no one else seems to have
been aware of the circumstance? Or is it that _I_ have been the only
person to be unaware of it? Also, the maid has just told me that, three
days ago, Maria Philipovna had some high words with the General. I
understand, then! Probably the words were concerning Mlle. Blanche.
Certainly something decisive is approaching.
VII
In the morning I sent for the maître d’hôtel, and explained to him
that, in future, my bill was to be rendered to me personally. As a
matter of fact, my expenses had never been so large as to alarm me, nor
to lead me to quit the hotel; while, moreover, I still had 160 gülden
left to me, and—in them—yes, in them, perhaps, riches awaited me. It
was a curious fact, that, though I had not yet won anything at play, I
nevertheless acted, thought, and felt as though I were sure, before
long, to become wealthy—since I could not imagine myself otherwise.
Next, I bethought me, despite the earliness of the hour, of going to
see Mr. Astley, who was staying at the Hôtel de l’Angleterre (a
hostelry at no great distance from our own). But suddenly De Griers
entered my room. This had never before happened, for of late that
gentleman and I had stood on the most strained and distant of terms—he
attempting no concealment of his contempt for me (he even made an
express point of showing it), and I having no reason to desire his
company. In short, I detested him. Consequently, his entry at the
present moment the more astounded me. At once I divined that something
out of the way was on the carpet.
He entered with marked affability, and began by complimenting me on my
room. Then, perceiving that I had my hat in my hands, he inquired
whither I was going so early; and, no sooner did he hear that I was
bound for Mr. Astley’s than he stopped, looked grave, and seemed
plunged in thought.